Uploaded June 2020 | Updated September 2026, 6 minutes ago
Well-meaning friends may tell you not to talk about your spouse's destructive behavior because you have no right to "judge." But is that the correct understanding of Jesus' words: "Judge not, that you be not judged"? No. Jesus is telling arrogant people not to get on their high-horse and pretend to be perfect.
Jesus is *not* saying we can’t point out sin. In fact, the same chapter, Jesus tells us THREE TIMES to identify sin.
Jesus’ “judge not” teaching simply means “don’t act like you’re sinless.”
I don’t know of very many abused or betrayed spouses who think they are perfect and sinless. Usually they are pretty hard on themselves or they wouldn’t have stayed so long. And frankly you don’t have to be perfect to say, “I’m being destroyed in my marriage, and I've got to get out of here.”
Pointing out abuse and betrayal and wanting a divorce isn't "pretending you're perfect." It's getting out to save your life and sanity.
------
A Life-Saving Divorce is a divorce for the serious reasons: a pattern of chronic emotional abuse, infidelity, domestic violence, sexual immorality, felony behavior, neglect, substance abuse, etc.
How to Get the Book, "The Life-Saving Divorce: Hope for People Leaving Destructive Relationships"
Paperback Book/Kindle via Amazon: amzn.to/3CCBsnr As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
Follow Gretchen Baskerville:
Facebook: facebook.com/gretchen.baskerville
Twitter: twitter.com/GGBaskerville
Instagram: instagram.com/gretchenbaskerville
Other helpful links
Website and Blog: LifeSavingDivorce.com
Divorce Story Interviews: LifeSavingDivorce.com/interviews
Life-Saving Divorce Email Signup: LifeSavingDivorce.com/courage
Well-meaning friends may tell you not to talk about your spouse's destructive behavior because you have no right to "judge." But is that the correct understanding of Jesus' words: "Judge not, that you be not judged"? No. Jesus is telling arrogant people not to get on their high-horse and pretend to be perfect.
Jesus is *not* saying we can’t point out sin. In fact, the same chapter, Jesus tells us THREE TIMES to identify sin.
Jesus’ “judge not” teaching simply means “don’t act like you’re sinless.”
I don’t know of very many abused or betrayed spouses who think they are perfect and sinless. Usually they are pretty hard on themselves or they wouldn’t have stayed so long. And frankly you don’t have to be perfect to say, “I’m being destroyed in my marriage, and I've got to get out of here.”
Pointing out abuse and betrayal and wanting a divorce isn't "pretending you're perfect." It's getting out to save your life and sanity.
------
A Life-Saving Divorce is a divorce for the serious reasons: a pattern of chronic emotional abuse, infidelity, domestic violence, sexual immorality, felony behavior, neglect, substance abuse, etc.
How to Get the Book, "The Life-Saving Divorce: Hope for People Leaving Destructive Relationships"
Paperback Book/Kindle via Amazon: amzn.to/3CCBsnr As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
Follow Gretchen Baskerville:
Facebook: facebook.com/gretchen.baskerville
Twitter: twitter.com/GGBaskerville
Instagram: instagram.com/gretchenbaskerville
Other helpful links
Website and Blog: LifeSavingDivorce.com
Divorce Story Interviews: LifeSavingDivorce.com/interviews
Life-Saving Divorce Email Signup: LifeSavingDivorce.com/courage
