Uploaded March 2026 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago
The way you frame a problem changes everything. 🔄
Most of us fall into the "You never listen to me" trap. But here is the truth: criticism usually triggers defensiveness, not change. 🛑
In this video, I’m sharing a simple shift to move from critical feedback to empowered requests.
Instead of: "You never listen to me!"
Try: "When I’m talking and you’re on your phone, I feel ignored. I’d love it if we could have phone-free dinners." 🍽️📱
Why this works:
✅ You name the behavior, not the person.
✅ You share your feeling (vulnerability = connection).
✅ You give them a clear way to "win" with a request.
Stop blaming and start building. 🧱✨
📚 Too Much Book: hfcbook.com
📩 Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
🔑 Ready to build healthier relationships? Join: terricole.com/tcm
🪔 Meditate with me: insighttimer.com/terricole
📸 Instagram: terricole.com/ig
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free, The Boundary Boss Workbook, and Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over a million people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see terricole.com
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
terricole.com/gethelp -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger, the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust.
The way you frame a problem changes everything. 🔄
Most of us fall into the "You never listen to me" trap. But here is the truth: criticism usually triggers defensiveness, not change. 🛑
In this video, I’m sharing a simple shift to move from critical feedback to empowered requests.
Instead of: "You never listen to me!"
Try: "When I’m talking and you’re on your phone, I feel ignored. I’d love it if we could have phone-free dinners." 🍽️📱
Why this works:
✅ You name the behavior, not the person.
✅ You share your feeling (vulnerability = connection).
✅ You give them a clear way to "win" with a request.
Stop blaming and start building. 🧱✨
📚 Too Much Book: hfcbook.com
📩 Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
🔑 Ready to build healthier relationships? Join: terricole.com/tcm
🪔 Meditate with me: insighttimer.com/terricole
📸 Instagram: terricole.com/ig
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free, The Boundary Boss Workbook, and Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over a million people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see terricole.com
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
terricole.com/gethelp -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger, the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust.
