Uploaded May 2026 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago
I’ve always said that our relationships are the mirrors of our internal world, but what happens when you realize a friendship has reached its expiration date? In this episode, I’m joined by the incredible Alex Elle (New York Times bestselling author of The Company We Keep) to dive deep into the "taboo" side of friendship.
We’re talking about why it’s okay to outgrow people, how to handle that "visceral" feeling of misalignment, and why some of our most sacred bonds are actually voluntary. If you’ve ever felt like you’re walking on eggshells with a friend or struggling with the guilt of moving on, this conversation is for you. We’re curing the "disease to please" and learning how to cultivate a VIP section that actually feels safe.
In this video, you’ll learn:
🔹How to tell if you’re "out of alignment" or if the relationship is worth the investment.
🔹The truth about self-accountability in friendship breakups.
🔹What it means to find people who will "be on their knees" with you in the dark times.
Find Alex at:
alexelle.com
instagram.com/alex_elle
📚 Too Much Book: hfcbook.com
📩 Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
🔑 Ready to build healthier relationships? Join: terricole.com/tcm
Time Stamps
00:00 - The Company We Keep: Redefining Friendship
02:21 - Alex L.’s Origin Story: Why we shift in our 30s
03:03 - Permission to change: Outgrowing vs. being outgrown
05:53 - The "Nikki" Story: When the vibe goes cold
07:43 - Why we walk on eggshells (and how to stop)
10:41 - Everything isn’t that deep: Incompatibility vs. Drama
15:15 - The "VIP Section": Who gets a front-row seat to your life?
18:35 - The Inventory: How do you feel when they leave?
21:15 - The Responsibility of Healthy Communication
24:31 - How to master the Art of Repair
29:05 - One-sided repair is not repair
34:56 - "On your knees" loyalty: The cost of true love
If You Enjoyed This, Watch These Videos
youtu.be/21JOqnKIKTk - Toxic Mother? Why Distance is the Only Way to Truly Heal with Ashley Oerman
youtu.be/IGyRz45cdxg - Which One Was Your Mom? The 7 Maternal Archetypes Explained
youtu.be/Fbiq8p5TLAg - Stop People Pleasing and Being Too Nice: The 1-Sentence Script You Need
youtu.be/EpUmm18TGoU - The Hidden Reason You Feel Like You’re Not Enough
🪔 Meditate with me: insighttimer.com/terricole
📸 Instagram: terricole.com/ig
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free, The Boundary Boss Workbook, and Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over a million people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see terricole.com
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
terricole.com/gethelp -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger, the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust.
#friendshipgoals #friendshipbreakup #healthyrelationships #peoplepleasing #personalgrowth
I’ve always said that our relationships are the mirrors of our internal world, but what happens when you realize a friendship has reached its expiration date? In this episode, I’m joined by the incredible Alex Elle (New York Times bestselling author of The Company We Keep) to dive deep into the "taboo" side of friendship.
We’re talking about why it’s okay to outgrow people, how to handle that "visceral" feeling of misalignment, and why some of our most sacred bonds are actually voluntary. If you’ve ever felt like you’re walking on eggshells with a friend or struggling with the guilt of moving on, this conversation is for you. We’re curing the "disease to please" and learning how to cultivate a VIP section that actually feels safe.
In this video, you’ll learn:
🔹How to tell if you’re "out of alignment" or if the relationship is worth the investment.
🔹The truth about self-accountability in friendship breakups.
🔹What it means to find people who will "be on their knees" with you in the dark times.
Find Alex at:
alexelle.com
instagram.com/alex_elle
📚 Too Much Book: hfcbook.com
📩 Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
🔑 Ready to build healthier relationships? Join: terricole.com/tcm
Time Stamps
00:00 - The Company We Keep: Redefining Friendship
02:21 - Alex L.’s Origin Story: Why we shift in our 30s
03:03 - Permission to change: Outgrowing vs. being outgrown
05:53 - The "Nikki" Story: When the vibe goes cold
07:43 - Why we walk on eggshells (and how to stop)
10:41 - Everything isn’t that deep: Incompatibility vs. Drama
15:15 - The "VIP Section": Who gets a front-row seat to your life?
18:35 - The Inventory: How do you feel when they leave?
21:15 - The Responsibility of Healthy Communication
24:31 - How to master the Art of Repair
29:05 - One-sided repair is not repair
34:56 - "On your knees" loyalty: The cost of true love
If You Enjoyed This, Watch These Videos
youtu.be/21JOqnKIKTk - Toxic Mother? Why Distance is the Only Way to Truly Heal with Ashley Oerman
youtu.be/IGyRz45cdxg - Which One Was Your Mom? The 7 Maternal Archetypes Explained
youtu.be/Fbiq8p5TLAg - Stop People Pleasing and Being Too Nice: The 1-Sentence Script You Need
youtu.be/EpUmm18TGoU - The Hidden Reason You Feel Like You’re Not Enough
🪔 Meditate with me: insighttimer.com/terricole
📸 Instagram: terricole.com/ig
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free, The Boundary Boss Workbook, and Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over a million people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see terricole.com
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
terricole.com/gethelp -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger, the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust.
#friendshipgoals #friendshipbreakup #healthyrelationships #peoplepleasing #personalgrowth
