Uploaded May 2024 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago
#classicvinyl #strictlyvinyl #vinyl #vinylrip #nostalgia #music #obscurerecords #obscurevinyl
"Come in here, dear boy, have a cigar, you're gonna go far..."
Lyrics
[Verse 1]
The music business gonna need stitches
After I slap these punk ass b*tches
Your producer is a f*cking loser
Watch this pimp backhand maneuver
[Chorus]
I must destroy the music industry
With cartoon pimps and MP3s
Make fun of everyone and their mother
Don't test me I'm a bad mother f*cker
[Verse 2]
Cruisin' for a bruisin' through time and space
Slapping CEOs in the f*cking face
I'll backhand your band as the music plays
B*tch slapping that damn DJ made my day
[Bridge]
I got a b*tch slap for your dumb a** too
Come close to the screen so I can slap you
The music industry must be destroyed
Making all the CEOs unemployed
[Break / Outro]
I'll slap that cigar out your f*cking mouth!
Don't test me b*tch I don't f*ck around!
#classicvinyl #strictlyvinyl #vinyl #vinylrip #nostalgia #music #obscurerecords #obscurevinyl
"Come in here, dear boy, have a cigar, you're gonna go far..."
Lyrics
[Verse 1]
The music business gonna need stitches
After I slap these punk ass b*tches
Your producer is a f*cking loser
Watch this pimp backhand maneuver
[Chorus]
I must destroy the music industry
With cartoon pimps and MP3s
Make fun of everyone and their mother
Don't test me I'm a bad mother f*cker
[Verse 2]
Cruisin' for a bruisin' through time and space
Slapping CEOs in the f*cking face
I'll backhand your band as the music plays
B*tch slapping that damn DJ made my day
[Bridge]
I got a b*tch slap for your dumb a** too
Come close to the screen so I can slap you
The music industry must be destroyed
Making all the CEOs unemployed
[Break / Outro]
I'll slap that cigar out your f*cking mouth!
Don't test me b*tch I don't f*ck around!
![Beach is Closed (1985)
#hardarchive #classicvinyl #strictlyvinyl #vinyl #vinylrip #nostalgia #music #obscurerecords #obscurevinyl #funk #80svinyl #80sfunk
This pop funk single by Richard Magic and The Raiders was released less than a year after the strange outbreak of a new form of pool A*DS had spread through stingrays to the local beaches causing them all to be shut down. The disease was causing the infected wildlife to display bizarre, aggressive, and horny behavior towards humans.
Lyrics
[Verse 1]
These damn stingrays are getting funky
Some say the rays had s*x with monkeys
Theyre stabbing people with their stingers
Theyre taking out their hate on swimmers
These stingrays are f*cking aggressive
Theyre making sure we get the message
Better be careful if youre surfing
You dont want to pull a Steve Irwin
[Chorus 1]
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The beach is closed today
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
Beach closed due to stingrays
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The beach is closed today
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The stingrays all have a*ds
[Verse 2]
The stingrays numbers keep on growing
Now all the best beaches are closing
Been a week since the beach was open
Theyre gonna close down the whole ocean
Everyone is getting infected
Stingrays strike when you least expect it
On the beach you can never relax
Stingrays are also known to smoke cr*ck
[Chorus 2]
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The beach is closed today
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
Beach closed due to stingrays
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The beach is closed today
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The stingrays all have a*ds (Woo!)
[Keytar Solo]
[Verse 3]
The aids are causing strange behavior
These stingrays have no fear of danger
Theyve gotten completely out of control
Theyre stinging people in the a**hole
They dont care if youre already g*y
They killed a life guard the other day
Before you swim Ill give fair warning
The stingrays have aids and theyre horny
[Chorus 3]
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The beach is closed today
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
Beach closed due to stingrays
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The beach is closed today
The beach is closed (beach is closed)
The stingrays all have a*ds (f*ck yeah)
[Outro]
You dont wanna get a*ds, b*tch!
Woo!
F*ck yeah! Beach is Closed (1985)](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/O0DikilPCLw/mqdefault.jpg)





![B*tch Slap (1967)
#obscurerecords #obscureviny #classicvinyl #strictlyvinyl #vinyl #vinylrip #nostalgia #music #60svinyl #60ssoul #randb
Extremely rare 1967 R&B soul demo version of B*tch Slap by soul singer Reginald Right Hook Jackson, the first cousin of Cornelius Backhand Jackson. This demo was recorded two years before Mike Turners release in 1969. At the time Reginald had been receiving complaints about singing too many songs about slapping women, to which he commented on saying quote They just proving that its impossible to sing ENOUGH songs about slapping b*tches. Reginald, who was considered a sex symbol at the time, dismissed the numerous claims that he had slapped over one hundred b*tches off of the stage during his high energy live performances in the summer of 1967.
Lyrics
[Verse 1]
Asking for dinner aint asking for much
You had one job and still f*cked it up
Sometimes you gotta learn respect
I use my pimp hand to correct
[Chorus]
Its called a b*tch slap (b*tch slap!)
Come get your face clapped (face clapped!)
Come get your lip smacked (smack smack!)
You need a b*tch slap (oh oh yeah!)
[Verse 2]
I make money but you spend it all
Dont make me leave to get some menthols
I wont wait to ditch you b*tch
Before I go just one more hit
[Chorus]
Its called a b*tch slap (b*tch slap!)
Come get your face clapped (face clapped!)
Come get your lip smacked (smack smack!)
You need a b*tch slap (oh oh yeah!)
[Verse 3]
Asking for dinner aint asking for much
You had one job and still f*cked it up
Sometimes you gotta learn respect
I use my pimp hand to correct
[Chorus]
Its called a b*tch slap (b*tch slap!)
Come get your face clapped (face clapped!)
Come get your lip smacked (smack smack!)
You need a b*tch slap (oh oh yeah!) B*tch Slap (1967)](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/QkfSsEBQRJ0/mqdefault.jpg)

![All I Want for Christmas (1967)
Rare copy of the original uncensored version of All I Want for Christmas performed by Mike Tooth Fairy Jones.
LYRICS
[Chorus]
All I want for Christmas
Is your two front teeth
Your two front teeth
B*tch your two front teeth
Sh*t, if I could only
Have your two front teeth
Then I could wish you
Merry Fistmas
[Verse 1]
Itll be so long til you can say
Sister Susie sitting on a sh*tter!
B*tch you better watch your mouth
I will slap a n****
[Chorus]
All I want for Christmas
Is your two front teeth
Your two front teeth
B*tch your two front teeth
Sh*t, if I could only
Have your two front teeth
Then I could wish you
Merry Fistmas! All I Want for Christmas (1967)](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RD2zgivw-o8/mqdefault.jpg)
![Eight Maids a Milking (1968)
#obscurerecords #obscureviny #classicvinyl #strictlyvinyl #vinyl #vinylrip #nostalgia #hardarchive #soulmusic #60ssoul #christmasmusic
Extremely rare 1960s Christmas soul single by Tiny Herman and The Milkmen. Tiny wrote this song about the eighth day of Christmas, saying its by far the most important day of the twelve days of Christmas. This holiday hit single was at the top of the pop charts for exactly eight days in December 1968 before being knocked off by Aretha Franklins feminist anthem Think.
Lyrics
[Verse 1]
Baby! I dont want no birds in a pear tree
I just want to watch these ladies squeeze
Ooh yeah!
[Chorus 1]
Eight maids a milking (eight maids)
I want eight maids a milking (thats hot!)
Give me eight maids a milking (f*ck yeah)
I need eight maids a milking (thats a lot of milk!)
[Verse 2]
Baby! I dont need any of those fancy gifts
I just want to see those awesome t*ts
Woo! Yeah
[Chorus 2]
Eight maids a milking (eight maids)
I want eight maids a milking (thats hot!)
Give me eight maids a milking (f*ck yeah)
I need eight maids a milking (thats a lot of milk!)
[Bridge]
Theres ten lords a leaping to peep through the window
Trying to see all that sweet milk flow (oh yeah!)
The pipers all start piping with their pipes
With their skin flutes they bang out tunes all night
(Woo!)
[Verse 3]
Baby! I dont care about those stocking fillers
I just want to see those sweet sweet milkers
Oh yeah!
[Chorus 3]
Eight maids a milking (eight maids)
I want eight maids a milking (thats hot!)
Give me eight maids a milking (f*ck yeah)
I need eight maids a milking (thats a lot of milk!)
[Chorus 4]
Eight maids a milking (eight maids)
I want eight maids a milking (thats hot!)
Give me eight maids a milking (f*ck yeah)
I need eight maids a milking (thats a lot of milk!)
Merry Milkmas! Eight Maids a Milking (1968)](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RFUj5_NYtQ4/mqdefault.jpg)
