Uploaded June 2026 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago
Dr. Paul Eastwick, PhD, is a professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, and a leading expert on the modern science of mate selection in humans. We discuss what people actually look for in a partner, including surprising findings about age preferences, finances, and physical attractiveness. We also discuss why dating apps often lead people to select for traits that don't support lasting partnerships. We discuss how initial attractions form and evolve and which factors best predict romantic relationship stability and satisfaction. We also explain activities that can expand your dating pool, as well as practical tools for building and sustaining healthy romantic relationships. This episode is for anyone currently in or wanting to be in a relationship.
Show notes: go.hubermanlab.com/P0ICoDV
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Dr. Paul Eastwick
Website: pauleastwick.com
Bonded by Evolution (book): amzn.to/43P4ccq
Love Factually podcast: lovefactuallypod.com
Substack: substack.com/@pauleastwick
BlueSky: https://bsky.app/profile/pauleastwick.bsky.social
Instagram: instagram.com/pauleastwick
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/paul-eastwick-76a2471
Timestamps
00:00:00 Paul Eastwick
00:03:25 Evolutionary Models of Dating, Mate Value
00:08:57 Initial Attraction, Maturity
00:12:56 Sponsors: David & Lingo
00:15:21 Dating Apps; Shared Moments & Developing Attraction
00:24:17 First Impressions & Early Relationships; Partner Bias
00:31:41 Friends & Family Support; Relationship Research, Attachment Theory
00:42:15 Sponsor: AG1
00:43:34 Couple Friends, Advice from Others
00:47:35 Social Support, Women vs Men
00:55:05 Dating App Algorithms, Distrust of Men & Women
01:05:29 Activities & Dating, Observing Date Social Behavior
01:11:25 Texting, Verbal Skills
01:16:15 Sponsor: LMNT
01:17:36 Partner Actions, Dating vs Relationship
01:22:57 Dating & Asking Good Questions; Genuine Connection
01:29:36 Attraction, What Qualities Men & Women Want
01:36:18 Homosexual Dating & Relationships
01:40:08 Finances; Job Loss; Men vs Women, Ambition
01:46:28 Sponsor: Function
01:48:05 Age Difference, Men vs Women Preference; Wanting Children
01:54:58 Church, Activities, Small Groups & Dating; Work; Perceived Similarity
02:07:10 Social Media, Attraction to Alternative Partners, Infidelity
02:19:13 Stranger Attention, Mate Value
02:24:58 Past Relationship Value; Relationship Duration, Breakups
02:34:33 Physical Intimacy & Relationship Satisfaction
02:39:32 Young Adults & Changing Relationships, Technology
02:47:31 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Protocols Book, Sponsors, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter
#hubermanlab
Disclaimer & Disclosures: hubermanlab.com/disclaimer
Dr. Paul Eastwick, PhD, is a professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, and a leading expert on the modern science of mate selection in humans. We discuss what people actually look for in a partner, including surprising findings about age preferences, finances, and physical attractiveness. We also discuss why dating apps often lead people to select for traits that don't support lasting partnerships. We discuss how initial attractions form and evolve and which factors best predict romantic relationship stability and satisfaction. We also explain activities that can expand your dating pool, as well as practical tools for building and sustaining healthy romantic relationships. This episode is for anyone currently in or wanting to be in a relationship.
Show notes: go.hubermanlab.com/P0ICoDV
Thank you to our sponsors
AG1: drinkag1.com/huberman
David: davidprotein.com/huberman
Lingo: lingo.com/huberman
LMNT: drinklmnt.com/huberman
Function: functionhealth.com/huberman
Follow Huberman Lab
Instagram: instagram.com/hubermanlab
Threads: threads.net/@hubermanlab
X: https://x.com/hubermanlab
Facebook: facebook.com/hubermanlab
TikTok: tiktok.com/@hubermanlab
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/andrew-huberman
Website: hubermanlab.com
Dr. Paul Eastwick
Website: pauleastwick.com
Bonded by Evolution (book): amzn.to/43P4ccq
Love Factually podcast: lovefactuallypod.com
Substack: substack.com/@pauleastwick
BlueSky: https://bsky.app/profile/pauleastwick.bsky.social
Instagram: instagram.com/pauleastwick
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/paul-eastwick-76a2471
Timestamps
00:00:00 Paul Eastwick
00:03:25 Evolutionary Models of Dating, Mate Value
00:08:57 Initial Attraction, Maturity
00:12:56 Sponsors: David & Lingo
00:15:21 Dating Apps; Shared Moments & Developing Attraction
00:24:17 First Impressions & Early Relationships; Partner Bias
00:31:41 Friends & Family Support; Relationship Research, Attachment Theory
00:42:15 Sponsor: AG1
00:43:34 Couple Friends, Advice from Others
00:47:35 Social Support, Women vs Men
00:55:05 Dating App Algorithms, Distrust of Men & Women
01:05:29 Activities & Dating, Observing Date Social Behavior
01:11:25 Texting, Verbal Skills
01:16:15 Sponsor: LMNT
01:17:36 Partner Actions, Dating vs Relationship
01:22:57 Dating & Asking Good Questions; Genuine Connection
01:29:36 Attraction, What Qualities Men & Women Want
01:36:18 Homosexual Dating & Relationships
01:40:08 Finances; Job Loss; Men vs Women, Ambition
01:46:28 Sponsor: Function
01:48:05 Age Difference, Men vs Women Preference; Wanting Children
01:54:58 Church, Activities, Small Groups & Dating; Work; Perceived Similarity
02:07:10 Social Media, Attraction to Alternative Partners, Infidelity
02:19:13 Stranger Attention, Mate Value
02:24:58 Past Relationship Value; Relationship Duration, Breakups
02:34:33 Physical Intimacy & Relationship Satisfaction
02:39:32 Young Adults & Changing Relationships, Technology
02:47:31 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Protocols Book, Sponsors, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter
#hubermanlab
Disclaimer & Disclosures: hubermanlab.com/disclaimer
