Uploaded August 2015 | Updated September 2026, 1 week ago
My hope with today's Philosophy Friday: On Criticism, is that you take a moment to look at your own behaviors and see those that are serving to connect you with those around you and let go of those behaviors that serve to distance you from others.
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My previous video: youtube.com/watch?v=Y82B_Si6u_4
Another Philosophy Friday: youtube.com/watch?v=lOfrxi_knHw
According the the research of relationship experts John and Julie Gottman the four henchmen of a relationship are:
Criticism
Stating one’s complaints as a defect in one’s partner’s personality, i.e., giving the partner negative trait attributions. Example: “You always talk about yourself. You are so selfish.”
Contempt
Statements that come from a relative position of superiority. Contempt is the greatest predictor of divorce and must be eliminated. Example: “You’re an idiot.”
Defensiveness
Self-protection in the form of righteous indignation or innocent victim-hood. Defensiveness wards off a perceived attack. Example: “It’s not my fault that we’re always late; it’s your fault.”
Stonewalling
Emotional withdrawal from interaction. Example: The listener does not give the speaker the usual nonverbal signals that the listener is “tracking” the speaker.
Don't do these things.
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My hope with today's Philosophy Friday: On Criticism, is that you take a moment to look at your own behaviors and see those that are serving to connect you with those around you and let go of those behaviors that serve to distance you from others.
Subscribe to FRESH PRINCESS!: goo.gl/3tcyi
My previous video: youtube.com/watch?v=Y82B_Si6u_4
Another Philosophy Friday: youtube.com/watch?v=lOfrxi_knHw
According the the research of relationship experts John and Julie Gottman the four henchmen of a relationship are:
Criticism
Stating one’s complaints as a defect in one’s partner’s personality, i.e., giving the partner negative trait attributions. Example: “You always talk about yourself. You are so selfish.”
Contempt
Statements that come from a relative position of superiority. Contempt is the greatest predictor of divorce and must be eliminated. Example: “You’re an idiot.”
Defensiveness
Self-protection in the form of righteous indignation or innocent victim-hood. Defensiveness wards off a perceived attack. Example: “It’s not my fault that we’re always late; it’s your fault.”
Stonewalling
Emotional withdrawal from interaction. Example: The listener does not give the speaker the usual nonverbal signals that the listener is “tracking” the speaker.
Don't do these things.
MORE LINKS
For more Fresh P: goo.gl/md68WTl
Facebook: goo.gl/KrScu5
Pinterest: pinterest.com/freshpcooks
Instagram: instagram.com/freshprincesscooks
Twitter: twitter.com/CorrinCPhillips
Tumblr: freshpcooks.tumblr.com
