Uploaded August 2015 | Updated September 2026, 1 hour ago

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My ode to cheap furniture. This is the album version from 2001’s Living it Down, available in Spotify, iTunes, and others. I also played this song on Comedy Central’s Premium Blend in 2001.

Here are the lyrics:



I took a good look at my life
What I saw I didn’t like
‘cause there was nothing that was built to last

Underneath all the cheap veneers
There’s nothing that can stand the years
It all falls apart so fast


Particle Board,
All the furniture I own is made of particle board
It’s all I can afford, particle board
Particle Board
Is this what I’ve been working my whole life for?
For walls and a door and particle board

I have to live my life alone
‘Cause if I ever bring a woman home
She’ll take one look at my place and any chance is blown
I guess that I’d have to admit
A guy looks like he can’t commit
When a hex wrench can dismantle anything he owns

Particle board
If I ever move I’ll leave it here on the floor
To move would cost more than my particle board
Particle board
My life sucks and it can’t be ignored
All I can afford is particle board

I tried to live my life without things to tie me down
That’s why I only buy crap I won’t miss if I skip town
But now I see that I can’t live my life like this forever
I’d like to own some furniture I don’t have to put together

Solo

I took a good look at my life, what I saw I didn’t like
It made me want to run away and hide
Just one look around my home shows that everything I own
Is all leaning to one side

Particle Board,
All the furniture I own is made of particle board
It’s all I can afford, particle board
Particle board
My life sucks and it can’t be ignored
All I can afford is particle board
Particle Board
Is this what I’ve been working my whole life for?
For walls and a door and particle board
Particle Board,
All the furniture I own is made of particle board
It’s all I can afford, particle board