Uploaded December 2017 | Updated September 2026, 1 hour ago
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I can't even believe this year is basically over.
I'm not really feeling the cathartic release of another year ending, but it's pretty much here so I figured it'd be a good time to upload this.
Gosh, I don't even know where to start. 2017 was the year of milestones for me. I did so many things I never saw myself doing before, and I reached some personal goals I am so extremely happy with.
The start of this year was very hard emotionally, and it feels like such a long time ago. Blackjack was my rock during most of this time.
April was one of the best months. I was so happy with my life and Blackjack took me through my first real show to place 4th in our intro dressage test. Easily one of the greatest days of my year. So much pride in my boy. April was also the month I met Mack, and our journey began.
During summer I hit a major low point. My mental health suffered severely at some points during this year, but things are improving now. I rekindled some old friendships, made some new relationships, and am now just really coming to terms with growing up.
I also achieved my goal of jumping higher than 2'6", and included those clips of me jumping a 2'7" oxer back in July!
Leaving Blackjack a few months ago was heartbreaking and I will forever be saddened that things didn't work out the way I wanted. But I am so grateful to have met Mack. He's my best friend right now and I really, really hope he can stay in my life for a long time. I also made some big decisions about my future this year. Overall, this year has been a lot about changing my identity and finding and losing myself so many times, but I'm hopeful that things become clearer soon.
2018 is a year I have been waiting for for so long. It'll be the year I graduate high school and really start my life. Thank you to everyone who supported my journey this year, and bring on 2018!
{ hd makes things pretty }
I can't even believe this year is basically over.
I'm not really feeling the cathartic release of another year ending, but it's pretty much here so I figured it'd be a good time to upload this.
Gosh, I don't even know where to start. 2017 was the year of milestones for me. I did so many things I never saw myself doing before, and I reached some personal goals I am so extremely happy with.
The start of this year was very hard emotionally, and it feels like such a long time ago. Blackjack was my rock during most of this time.
April was one of the best months. I was so happy with my life and Blackjack took me through my first real show to place 4th in our intro dressage test. Easily one of the greatest days of my year. So much pride in my boy. April was also the month I met Mack, and our journey began.
During summer I hit a major low point. My mental health suffered severely at some points during this year, but things are improving now. I rekindled some old friendships, made some new relationships, and am now just really coming to terms with growing up.
I also achieved my goal of jumping higher than 2'6", and included those clips of me jumping a 2'7" oxer back in July!
Leaving Blackjack a few months ago was heartbreaking and I will forever be saddened that things didn't work out the way I wanted. But I am so grateful to have met Mack. He's my best friend right now and I really, really hope he can stay in my life for a long time. I also made some big decisions about my future this year. Overall, this year has been a lot about changing my identity and finding and losing myself so many times, but I'm hopeful that things become clearer soon.
2018 is a year I have been waiting for for so long. It'll be the year I graduate high school and really start my life. Thank you to everyone who supported my journey this year, and bring on 2018!
![Home [End of an Era]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mqdcHq2e2BI/mqdefault.jpg "Home [End of an Era]
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Tomorrow I start a new chapter of my life.
Tomorrow I move away to university, where I will likely spend the next 8-9 years studying. A huge chapter of my life is closing today.
These horses have changed my life. I would not be who I am today without them. This video is a celebration of all the love and triumph Ive experienced in the last 6 years. Ive edited in my proudest moments, and the moments where Ive felt overcome by love and joy for these beautiful animals.
Getting involved with horses is what made me realize my true purpose in this world, and helped me realize what I was born to do. I know that no matter what, I will spend my life being with horses and helping to change their lives for the better.
I am so thankful for everything. For these horses, and for my life. They have always made me the best version of myself. They have been my dearest teachers and closest friends. There are no words to eloquently express just how much they mean to me.
The most heartbreaking part of this is leaving my old life behind. There is no going back from this, no way to reverse the clock and go back to how everything used to be. Cheyenne and Blackjack will be pieces of my past. And Ill be leaving Willow for a whole year.
But if theres anything Ive learned from these horses, it is how to be brave. Even when Im scared. Theyve taught me that I am so much more than I believe. They showed me the value of my life on the days when I didnt want to wake up. I am strong enough to move forward with the rest of my life because of them.
But oh, I owe the most to my beautiful Willow. My irreplaceable heart horse. Willow has made every single one of my dreams come true. He is the best part of me, the part that has learned to have patience and kindness, the part of me that has learned to be brave and have courage even when my legs are weak. He was the best thing to ever happen to me. I have to have faith that well be together forever, no matter what obstacles we face going forward. It is because of him that I know I can do this, even if were apart. No matter what, Ill always come back to him.
Thank you, for your honest support and love over the last 6 years. I cant say Ill have much new content for awhile. Ill still make videos of course, but I think its important I step away a little bit to focus on my future. This is truly the end of an era for me. If all goes like I hope it does, then Willow and I will be reunited next year and hell come live with me in my new life.
These horses are home.
I am going to miss them all so much.
Thank you, and I hope you all dont forget about us ♥")
