Uploaded August 2016 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago
[Warning: Using such material in class can get you seriously fired!] This is about a guy who, well, had…. I mean, no, no – what I mean is that he managed to grow a rather big marrow. OK, look, I don’t know how to describe the song – I think the refrain says it all:
“(Ooooh! What a beauty!), I've never seen one as big as that before
(Ooooh! What a beauty!), It must be two feet long or even more
It's such a lovely colour, and nice and round and fat
I never thought a marrow could grow as big as that
(Ooooh! What a beauty!), I've never seen one as big as that before…”
Just listen to it. It’s incredible how much humour the comic genius of Kenneth Williams manages to squeeze out of a rather simple song – just by colouring his voice…
[NB: I do not own the copyright to this audio clip. I have uploaded it here for educational purposes].
[Warning: Using such material in class can get you seriously fired!] This is about a guy who, well, had…. I mean, no, no – what I mean is that he managed to grow a rather big marrow. OK, look, I don’t know how to describe the song – I think the refrain says it all:
“(Ooooh! What a beauty!), I've never seen one as big as that before
(Ooooh! What a beauty!), It must be two feet long or even more
It's such a lovely colour, and nice and round and fat
I never thought a marrow could grow as big as that
(Ooooh! What a beauty!), I've never seen one as big as that before…”
Just listen to it. It’s incredible how much humour the comic genius of Kenneth Williams manages to squeeze out of a rather simple song – just by colouring his voice…
[NB: I do not own the copyright to this audio clip. I have uploaded it here for educational purposes].
![Comedy for ELT - Homo Devis 2 [The Race]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ux876msHnXg/mqdefault.jpg "Comedy for ELT - Homo Devis 2 [The Race]
Scientists have recently discovered a new human (sub-)species. It’s called ‘Homo Devis’. Most of us plebs refer to them as ‘the super posh’ and ‘the filthy rich’, though people have been known to use other names as well… These people live differently, they think differently, they speak differently.
A brilliant comment on class stratification by the very talented Catherine Tate. Taken from the BBC TV Series ‘The Catherine Tate Show’. Level: C1 – C2 Topics: Rich – Poor / Class / Discrimination / Values.
[NB: I do not own the copyright to this audio clip. I have uploaded it here for educational purposes].
SCRIPT
M: Now – remember what daddy told you about sports day?
S&D: That ‘The taking part is everything; to win with dignity and to lose with pride in the knowledge that you did your absolute best’. *
M: Remember, whatever happens here today, mummy and daddy are immensely proud of you.
S&D: Thank you mummy…
M: OK darlings, now… it’s nearly time… in perpetua vincere.
S&D: In perpetua vincere… *
A: In lane 1, Cloe Taylor Thomas; in lane 2, Thomas Taylor Thomas; * in lane 3, Imogen Fitzroy Ferguson; in lane 4, Fergus Fitzroy Ferguson; * in lane 5, Emilia Harvey Henry; and in lane 6, Henry Harvey Henry. *
R: On your marks; get – set - * go!
M: Nooooo!!! It’s the eggs!! They’re not organic!!! (the children scream and everybody rushes off to the cars…) ***")
