Uploaded July 2026 | Updated September 2026, 7 hours ago
This is a classic session of Where Should We Begin? They share a legacy of war, a refugee upbringing and family trauma. Their marriage was seen as taboo and now they're trying to build a happier relationship for their child.
Chapters
00:00 What Happens When Love Turns Into War?
00:36 Why This Story Comes With A Warning
01:18 Was The Affair The Real Beginning?
01:39 What Happens When Love Is Forbidden?
03:03 Can This Marriage Be Saved?
03:30 How Does A Refugee Story Shape A Marriage?
05:00 What Happens When A Parent Leaves?
07:06 What Changes When You Share The Pain?
09:24 How Does Childhood Violence Follow You?
11:34 How Does Trauma Travel Across Generations?
13:33 Where Does The Affair Fit In?
15:32 What If You Brought The Charm Home?
17:43 Are You Fighting Each Other Or Fighting To Survive?
20:47 Why Do They Keep Triggering Each Other?
22:09 What Does Survival Mode Do To Love?
22:50 Are The Dishes Really About The Dishes?
25:03 Can Adults Give Themselves Permission To Play?
27:03 Why Is It So Hard For Her To Stop?
28:09 When Does A Partner Become A Parent?
29:40 Can They Rewrite The Dishes Conversation?
34:17 How Do You Break The Choreography Of Conflict?
35:34 What Is Your Daughter Learning From You?
37:56 What's Missing From Their Marriage?
About Where Should We Begin?:
Every Monday morning, step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others.
About Esther Perel:
Psychotherapist, relationship expert, and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED Talks have garnered more than 40 million views and her bestselling books, Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs, are global phenomena translated into more than 30 languages. Esther is also the host of the hit podcast Where Should We Begin? which is available on Apple Podcasts. Learn more at EstherPerel.com or by subscribe to her Substack Entre Nous for bonus content.
This is a classic session of Where Should We Begin? They share a legacy of war, a refugee upbringing and family trauma. Their marriage was seen as taboo and now they're trying to build a happier relationship for their child.
Chapters
00:00 What Happens When Love Turns Into War?
00:36 Why This Story Comes With A Warning
01:18 Was The Affair The Real Beginning?
01:39 What Happens When Love Is Forbidden?
03:03 Can This Marriage Be Saved?
03:30 How Does A Refugee Story Shape A Marriage?
05:00 What Happens When A Parent Leaves?
07:06 What Changes When You Share The Pain?
09:24 How Does Childhood Violence Follow You?
11:34 How Does Trauma Travel Across Generations?
13:33 Where Does The Affair Fit In?
15:32 What If You Brought The Charm Home?
17:43 Are You Fighting Each Other Or Fighting To Survive?
20:47 Why Do They Keep Triggering Each Other?
22:09 What Does Survival Mode Do To Love?
22:50 Are The Dishes Really About The Dishes?
25:03 Can Adults Give Themselves Permission To Play?
27:03 Why Is It So Hard For Her To Stop?
28:09 When Does A Partner Become A Parent?
29:40 Can They Rewrite The Dishes Conversation?
34:17 How Do You Break The Choreography Of Conflict?
35:34 What Is Your Daughter Learning From You?
37:56 What's Missing From Their Marriage?
About Where Should We Begin?:
Every Monday morning, step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others.
About Esther Perel:
Psychotherapist, relationship expert, and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED Talks have garnered more than 40 million views and her bestselling books, Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs, are global phenomena translated into more than 30 languages. Esther is also the host of the hit podcast Where Should We Begin? which is available on Apple Podcasts. Learn more at EstherPerel.com or by subscribe to her Substack Entre Nous for bonus content.
