Uploaded November 2025 | Updated September 2026, 4 minutes ago
They met in vet school and married just as they reached graduation. But now his work takes him around the world, forcing them to live apart for months at a time. He’s ready to start a family, but she’s hesitant: how can they think about children when they’re often separated by distance?
As they wonder about their next phase of life, Esther helps them uncover what sits beneath the surface: the loneliness of the one who stays, the guilt of the one who goes, and the challenge of learning to stay connected across miles of separation.
Chapters
00:00 What Happens When Two Futures Collide?
01:25 How Did Their Love Story Begin?
01:54 Can a Career Come Between Connection?
03:11 What If One Partner Wants a Child and the Other Isn't Sure?
04:43 How Do You Rebuild Trust When Words Stop Working?
06:17 What Happens When Two Paths Start to Diverge?
11:01 Can Love Survive Loneliness and Guilt?
17:21 How Do Our Families Shape the Way We Love?
23:24 The Snowblower That Started a Fight
25:08 A Snowy Morning—and Everything It Revealed
27:26 What Does Real Support Look Like?
28:48 Why Is Emotional Care So Hard to Give and Receive?
30:11 Can You Love Someone and Still Feel Resentful?
35:04 What Do Our Childhoods Teach Us About Love?
40:59 How Do You Balance Ambition and Intimacy?
47:58 What Future Are They Really Building Toward?
50:25 Where Do They Go From Here?
About Where Should We Begin?:
Every Monday morning, step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others.
About Esther Perel:
Psychotherapist, relationship expert, and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED Talks have garnered more than 40 million views and her bestselling books, Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs, are global phenomena translated into more than 30 languages. Esther is also the host of the hit podcast Where Should We Begin? which is available on Apple Podcasts. Learn more at EstherPerel.com (bit.ly/3Mi2081), join my community on Substack(bit.ly/4rurUEz) for Bonus Content or follow @EstherPerelOfficial on Instagram.
They met in vet school and married just as they reached graduation. But now his work takes him around the world, forcing them to live apart for months at a time. He’s ready to start a family, but she’s hesitant: how can they think about children when they’re often separated by distance?
As they wonder about their next phase of life, Esther helps them uncover what sits beneath the surface: the loneliness of the one who stays, the guilt of the one who goes, and the challenge of learning to stay connected across miles of separation.
Chapters
00:00 What Happens When Two Futures Collide?
01:25 How Did Their Love Story Begin?
01:54 Can a Career Come Between Connection?
03:11 What If One Partner Wants a Child and the Other Isn't Sure?
04:43 How Do You Rebuild Trust When Words Stop Working?
06:17 What Happens When Two Paths Start to Diverge?
11:01 Can Love Survive Loneliness and Guilt?
17:21 How Do Our Families Shape the Way We Love?
23:24 The Snowblower That Started a Fight
25:08 A Snowy Morning—and Everything It Revealed
27:26 What Does Real Support Look Like?
28:48 Why Is Emotional Care So Hard to Give and Receive?
30:11 Can You Love Someone and Still Feel Resentful?
35:04 What Do Our Childhoods Teach Us About Love?
40:59 How Do You Balance Ambition and Intimacy?
47:58 What Future Are They Really Building Toward?
50:25 Where Do They Go From Here?
About Where Should We Begin?:
Every Monday morning, step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others.
About Esther Perel:
Psychotherapist, relationship expert, and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED Talks have garnered more than 40 million views and her bestselling books, Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs, are global phenomena translated into more than 30 languages. Esther is also the host of the hit podcast Where Should We Begin? which is available on Apple Podcasts. Learn more at EstherPerel.com (bit.ly/3Mi2081), join my community on Substack(bit.ly/4rurUEz) for Bonus Content or follow @EstherPerelOfficial on Instagram.
