Uploaded January 2026 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago
I didn’t expect to encounter an old fear when I started watching Pluribus.
I thought I was just watching a piece of science fiction.
Instead, I found myself staring directly at a fear I’ve been circling for years—one that has changed shape many times over my life. It’s the fear(s) of death. It’s not a single fear, but a progression: fear of punishment. Then, fear of annihilation— nothingness. That fear was then eased by the belief that we continue without punishment. And then—unexpectedly—fear stirred again by the idea of Oneness itself. A different form of annihilation— being absorbed.Here’s where I’ve been and where I am now with this ever-changing fear of death.
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit grief2growth.substack.com/subscribe (grief2growth.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2)
I didn’t expect to encounter an old fear when I started watching Pluribus.
I thought I was just watching a piece of science fiction.
Instead, I found myself staring directly at a fear I’ve been circling for years—one that has changed shape many times over my life. It’s the fear(s) of death. It’s not a single fear, but a progression: fear of punishment. Then, fear of annihilation— nothingness. That fear was then eased by the belief that we continue without punishment. And then—unexpectedly—fear stirred again by the idea of Oneness itself. A different form of annihilation— being absorbed.Here’s where I’ve been and where I am now with this ever-changing fear of death.
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit grief2growth.substack.com/subscribe (grief2growth.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2)
