Uploaded December 2025 | Updated September 2026, 3 weeks ago
(Disclaimer: This is a fictional church not my church.. *)
(* ..but there are some real stories in here...)
One Sunday in our morning church service
My son looked over, he was kinda nervous
He said, Dad I almost fell asleep just then!
Is God angry with me? Did I commit a sin?
I told my son don't worry, not even one little bit!
The preacher's good but he don't know when to quit
And you're not the only one, squirming in your seat
Look around, others have got you beat!
It's about 20 minutes too long
20 minutes more than we need
When you hear the choir's fifth song
Just know there's one more comin' along!
So if you feel your mind drift and wander
And wonder why time seems so slow
Just remind yourself to hold on a bit longer
There's only 20 more minutes to go!
Aunt Edna's texting friends about lunch plans for the day
Sue and Fred in the pew are getting quite cozy, I'd say
And that old man's head is drooping, bobbing way too low
Son, there's one thing about this church you need to know...
It's about 20 minutes too long
20 minutes more than we need
When you hear the choir's fifth song
Just know there's one more comin' along!
So if you feel your mind drift and wander
And wonder why time seems so slow
Just remind yourself to hold on a bit longer
There's only 20 more minutes to go!
Every year for the Christmas pageant
We're encouraged to invite our friends
And they always ask me the schedule
When does it start and when does it end?
Our choir is the best in the city
A showcase of talent I'd say
But can they cut 20 minutes?
Or will I hear it all in one day!
(Disclaimer: This is a fictional church not my church.. *)
(* ..but there are some real stories in here...)
One Sunday in our morning church service
My son looked over, he was kinda nervous
He said, Dad I almost fell asleep just then!
Is God angry with me? Did I commit a sin?
I told my son don't worry, not even one little bit!
The preacher's good but he don't know when to quit
And you're not the only one, squirming in your seat
Look around, others have got you beat!
It's about 20 minutes too long
20 minutes more than we need
When you hear the choir's fifth song
Just know there's one more comin' along!
So if you feel your mind drift and wander
And wonder why time seems so slow
Just remind yourself to hold on a bit longer
There's only 20 more minutes to go!
Aunt Edna's texting friends about lunch plans for the day
Sue and Fred in the pew are getting quite cozy, I'd say
And that old man's head is drooping, bobbing way too low
Son, there's one thing about this church you need to know...
It's about 20 minutes too long
20 minutes more than we need
When you hear the choir's fifth song
Just know there's one more comin' along!
So if you feel your mind drift and wander
And wonder why time seems so slow
Just remind yourself to hold on a bit longer
There's only 20 more minutes to go!
Every year for the Christmas pageant
We're encouraged to invite our friends
And they always ask me the schedule
When does it start and when does it end?
Our choir is the best in the city
A showcase of talent I'd say
But can they cut 20 minutes?
Or will I hear it all in one day!
