Uploaded December 2017 | Updated September 2026, 2 hours ago

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When you’re fighting the War on Christmas the words “Merry Christmas” take on special meaning. It’s time we celebrated that fact in song!

Lyrics:
You’ve probably heard “Merry Christmas”
said in a new way
With scowls and steely eyes
that contradict what these words say
It’s no longer said with smiles
it comes out with a frown
’Cause they’re not trying to lift you up
they’re putting the whole world down

When they say “Merry Christmas”
they really mean “AMERICA!”
Their radio and TV shows
filled them with hysteria
The world is out to get them
they feel they’re under attack
When they say “Merry Christmas”
they mean “Take My Country Back!”

These surly yuletide warriors
get angrier each year
Their greetings get more desperate
as they give in to fear
They put special meaning into
these certain words they say
And hope these incantations
keep the evil world at bay


When they say “Merry Christmas’
they really mean “J’ACCUSE!”
To rain down condemnation on
those who don’t share their views
They just want to celebrate
the gift of peace and light
So if you say “Happy Holidays”
there’s gonna be a fight

A baby born this season brings us joy
Now all we see is Satan
and those in his employ

When they say “Merry Christmas”
they really mean “Fuck You!”
They inflict their politics
on everything they do
They’re not wishing peace on Earth
or good will anymore
It’s not “Merry Christmas”
it’s a call to war!
Oh, it’s not “Merry Christmas”
it’s a call to war!