Uploaded October 2020 | Updated September 2026, 3 weeks ago

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#stories
LYRICS:
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TRUMP
Sorry we’re gonna need that

MAILMAN
Wait, our ELECTION’S gonna need these
Up to half of Americans are voting by mail

TRUMP
Not my fault.

MAILMAN
It kind of is.

TRUMP
It was China!!

MAILMAN
but look how fast they recuperated
Now we need vote by mail to fix a problem you created:
this pandemic - and mail in voting is saving lives

TRUMP
All the real patriots will wait in line
Less boxes, less fraud, that’s why I planned the removals

MAILMAN
You’re pushing the envelope Donnie, that doesn’t get my stamp of approval
You know you can’t win so you made us your scapegoat

TRUMP
No - I hate’ fraud - no fake news, no fake votes

MAILMAN
Thru depression and world wars, always deliver was the policy
Even in a pandemic we’ll stand committed to democracy

TRUMP
But someone could die and vote two times after/

MAILMAN
You wanna defund mailmen - I thought blue lives matter?

TRUMP
I only want to count the good votes!

MAILMAN
we do too!
But you don’t get to choose the voters, the voters choose you!
you cheated on taxes, your wife, your SAT’s are in question
But let’s get this straight - you cant cheat the election
For 150 years we’ve been picking up the votes
So when you lose, I’ll be there to deliver the results
Speaking of...

TRUMP
Positive?

CREDITS
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Created by: Rhyme Combinator, 6 Point Harness, Loogaroo
Executive Producer: Reid Hoffman
Producers: Beau Lewis, Ian Alas
Director: Beau Lewis
Vocal Directors: Illmac, Frak
Writers: Illmac, Frak, Pass
Music: Will Randolph V, Chase Moore
Mix/master: Nafets
Animation: 6 Point Harness, Loogaroo

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CAST
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Donald Trump: Jonathan Kite
Mailman: Pass