Uploaded February 2025 | Updated September 2026, 1 week ago
Narcissistic people know exactly where to poke and bait to get a reaction. And when you donโt respond, they escalate, going after what matters most to you. Once you react, they flip the script, making you seem like the problem. This is how gaslighting works, keeping you off balance and questioning yourself.
In this week's episode, clinical psychologist and narcissism expert Dr. Ramani Durvasula joins me to break down how to recognize, resist, and recover from narcissistic relationships. We explore the spectrum of narcissistic behaviors, what makes these dynamics so confusing, and how to protect yourself.
The episode is titled Protecting Yourself from Narcissistic People with Dr. Ramani Durvasula, and you can watch it here: youtube.com/watch?v=5N38lO4FweA
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
You can follow me here:
๐ค apple.co/38ufGG0
๐ forresthanson.com
๐ธ instagram.com/f.hanson
Narcissistic people know exactly where to poke and bait to get a reaction. And when you donโt respond, they escalate, going after what matters most to you. Once you react, they flip the script, making you seem like the problem. This is how gaslighting works, keeping you off balance and questioning yourself.
In this week's episode, clinical psychologist and narcissism expert Dr. Ramani Durvasula joins me to break down how to recognize, resist, and recover from narcissistic relationships. We explore the spectrum of narcissistic behaviors, what makes these dynamics so confusing, and how to protect yourself.
The episode is titled Protecting Yourself from Narcissistic People with Dr. Ramani Durvasula, and you can watch it here: youtube.com/watch?v=5N38lO4FweA
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
You can follow me here:
๐ค apple.co/38ufGG0
๐ forresthanson.com
๐ธ instagram.com/f.hanson


![Healing from Parentification: When the โGifted Childโ Grows Up | Being Well
Some kids learn early on that the way to be loved is to be useful. They take on the emotional or practical care of their parents in a process known as parentification, and today @RickHanson I explore the costs of being a โgifted child.โ
We discuss the โbargainโ these kids make: suppressing their authentic self in order to fulfill a role and earn love. We then walk through four tracks that allow us to reclaim authenticity: becoming visible to yourself, building a coherent narrative, reconnecting with what you gave up, and renegotiating relationships.
This episode is heavily influenced by psychologist Alice Millerโs classic book The Drama of the Gifted Child.
Key Topics:
0:00 Intro: what is parentification?
9:58 Examining your own childhood
13:59 Grandiosity and Depression
19:19 Peer-entification, self-narratives, and adult relationships
24:08 [Sponsor] Audience Survey
24:46 Emotional insight and grief
28:20 Tracks to healing
36:20 Track 1: Becoming more visible to yourself
40:52 Track 2: Building a coherent narrative
46:52 Track 3: Reparenting
52:16 Track 4: Building a new bargain
56:30 [Sponsor] Shopify
57:40 Dealing with pushback from other people
1:07:53 Recap
Sponsors:
Level up your bedding with Quince. Go to https://Quince.com/BEINGWELL for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://shopify.com/beingwell.ย
Im not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: Im Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (https://amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (https://apple.co/38ufGG0). Im making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
Subscribe to Rick on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@RickHanson?sub_confirmation=1
Get Ricks Free Newsletters: https://rickhanson.com/writings/newsletters-from-dr-rick-hanson/
Follow Rick Here:
๐ https://rickhanson.com/
๐ธ https://www.instagram.com/rickhansonphd
You can follow me here:
๐ค https://apple.co/38ufGG0
๐ https://www.forresthanson.com
๐ธ https://www.instagram.com/f.hanson Healing from Parentification: When the โGifted Childโ Grows Up | Being Well](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/i3Cze-uUrt0/mqdefault.jpg)





![Happiness Researcher: Five Mindsets that Change Everything | Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, Being Well
Iโm joined by one of the worlds leading happiness researchers, Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, to discuss the real secret to happiness: feeling loved. Dr. Lyubomirsky explains the key difference between being loved and feeling loved, why self-improvement (usually) isnโt the answer, and how giving love leads to getting love. We then walk through five mindsets that help people both get more love and feel more loved. Other topics include the vulnerability paradox, capitalization and the importance of enthusiasm, using the mindsets to evaluate our relationships, polyamory and non-monogamous love, and AI companions.
You can find Sonjas diagnostic quiz at https://howtofeelloved.comย
About our Guest: Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky is a Professor of Psychology at UC Riverside, and the author of a number of bestselling books including How to Feel Loved with Dr. Harry Reis. She is one of the most frequently cited well-being researchers in the world.
Key Topics:
0:00 Intro: connection as the key to happiness
2:31 The difference between being loved and feeling loved
6:58 What love is
9:09 If only beliefs and the vulnerability paradox
19:36 Mindsets to embrace if youre looking for more love and connection
23:26 The relationship โseaโsaw
29:33 [Sponsor] Rula
31:44 Five mindsets to embrace if you want to feel more loved
51:51 AI companionship, polyamory, and MDMA
1:08:03 Recap
Sponsors:
Visit https://Rula.com/BEINGWELL to find affordable, high-quality therapy thatโs actually covered by insurance.ย
Level up your bedding with Quince. Go to https://Quince.com/BEINGWELL for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns.
Im not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: Im Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (https://amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (https://apple.co/38ufGG0). Im making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
Subscribe to Rick on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@RickHanson?sub_confirmation=1
Get Ricks Free Newsletters: https://rickhanson.com/writings/newsletters-from-dr-rick-hanson/
Follow Rick Here:
๐ https://rickhanson.com/
๐ธ https://www.instagram.com/rickhansonphd
You can follow me here:
๐ค https://apple.co/38ufGG0
๐ https://www.forresthanson.com
๐ธ https://www.instagram.com/f.hanson Happiness Researcher: Five Mindsets that Change Everything | Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, Being Well](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jit-FeTgaJs/mqdefault.jpg)

