Uploaded May 2026 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago
Are you reliable for everyone but yourself? Learn how to identify your needs, stop the cycle of burnout, and finally honor yourself with this HFC recovery guide.
📝 Guide to find your needs: terricole.com/guide
Are you the person everyone counts on, but you have no idea what you actually need? I’m diving deep into High Functioning Codependency (HFC) to explain why so many capable women are disconnected from their own needs—and how to finally start honoring yourself.
What you’ll learn in this episode:
I’ve spent years helping high functioning women realize that being "reliable" shouldn't mean self-abandoning. In this video, I share my personal framework for identifying your needs in categories like safety, autonomy, and connection. We’ll discuss why we minimize our feelings, how to stop the cycle of burnout and resentment, and the exact steps to take your "next right action."
📚 Too Much Book: hfcbook.com
📩 Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
🔑 Ready to build healthier relationships? Join: terricole.com/tcm
Time Stamps
0:00 Do you know what you need?
1:45 Defining High Functioning Codependency (HFC)
3:15 Why we get rewarded for having no needs
5:40 The cost of self-abandonment: Resentment & Burnout
8:05 Breaking down the Needs List (Safety, Emotional, Autonomy)
11:15 Why HFCs are "perennial listeners"
14:50 Self-Love vs. Self-Consideration
16:50 A simple practice to start honoring yourself today
If You Enjoyed This, Watch These Videos
youtu.be/pjEuiIiqOIk?si=vz9c5FI6abGePJTx - Are you overly attached? 11 ways to heal from codependency
youtu.be/AuweH-5IJ4A?si=QqOkalFLevSOXdIo - 5 Traits of High-Functioning Codependency (Is This You?)
youtu.be/ehIHuuVdSdM?si=IyTky71THjrSwBPc - Disordered Boundaries + High-Functioning Codependency: What You Need to Know (Part 1)
youtu.be/JqdCXjxM7MQ?si=CMe_OJWTsaDES4td - The High Price of High-Functioning Codependency
🪔 Meditate with me: insighttimer.com/terricole
📸 Instagram: terricole.com/ig
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free, The Boundary Boss Workbook, and Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over a million people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see terricole.com
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
terricole.com/gethelp -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger, the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust.
#codependency #burnout #peoplepleasing #selfcompassion
Are you reliable for everyone but yourself? Learn how to identify your needs, stop the cycle of burnout, and finally honor yourself with this HFC recovery guide.
📝 Guide to find your needs: terricole.com/guide
Are you the person everyone counts on, but you have no idea what you actually need? I’m diving deep into High Functioning Codependency (HFC) to explain why so many capable women are disconnected from their own needs—and how to finally start honoring yourself.
What you’ll learn in this episode:
I’ve spent years helping high functioning women realize that being "reliable" shouldn't mean self-abandoning. In this video, I share my personal framework for identifying your needs in categories like safety, autonomy, and connection. We’ll discuss why we minimize our feelings, how to stop the cycle of burnout and resentment, and the exact steps to take your "next right action."
📚 Too Much Book: hfcbook.com
📩 Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
🔑 Ready to build healthier relationships? Join: terricole.com/tcm
Time Stamps
0:00 Do you know what you need?
1:45 Defining High Functioning Codependency (HFC)
3:15 Why we get rewarded for having no needs
5:40 The cost of self-abandonment: Resentment & Burnout
8:05 Breaking down the Needs List (Safety, Emotional, Autonomy)
11:15 Why HFCs are "perennial listeners"
14:50 Self-Love vs. Self-Consideration
16:50 A simple practice to start honoring yourself today
If You Enjoyed This, Watch These Videos
youtu.be/pjEuiIiqOIk?si=vz9c5FI6abGePJTx - Are you overly attached? 11 ways to heal from codependency
youtu.be/AuweH-5IJ4A?si=QqOkalFLevSOXdIo - 5 Traits of High-Functioning Codependency (Is This You?)
youtu.be/ehIHuuVdSdM?si=IyTky71THjrSwBPc - Disordered Boundaries + High-Functioning Codependency: What You Need to Know (Part 1)
youtu.be/JqdCXjxM7MQ?si=CMe_OJWTsaDES4td - The High Price of High-Functioning Codependency
🪔 Meditate with me: insighttimer.com/terricole
📸 Instagram: terricole.com/ig
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free, The Boundary Boss Workbook, and Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over a million people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see terricole.com
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
terricole.com/gethelp -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger, the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust.
#codependency #burnout #peoplepleasing #selfcompassion
