Uploaded March 2026 | Updated September 2026, 1 week ago
In today's episode, we take a look at the brutal landscape of South Texas Consumer Slums/Heat Islands. The first half of the video is spent deconstructing the landscape of hell, while the second half of the video is spent offering viable solutions to the problems and pathologies examined here.
Here are some great alternatives to the garbage trees being planted in parking lots, commercial centers, and private residential lots in South Texas right now.
Native Street Trees for South Texas Parking Lot Hellscapes...
If only there were even the slightest inclination to use any of our South Texas native leguminous trees in the parking lot hell strips around South Texas, maybe the residents here would have some shade to protect themselves and their cars from the sun and heat. Instead, we get regionally-inappropriate live oaks that destroy the sidewalks and lousy non-native palm trees that don't provide shade.
The native plants in a region define that place. Our relationship with those plants gives us a sense of identity. How we treat those plants in turn reflects back on the way we think of ourselves. People need to stop trying to pretend that they live somewhere else. Stop trying to emulate corny Victorian to English gardens or Spanish colonial crap. You will drain your aquifers (and your financial reserves) doing so.
In Tucson or Phoenix, people are using plants like Palo Verde and Mesquite as street trees and parking lot trees. Why can't we do the same here? Why the insistence on corny palm trees and live oaks from places that get twice the average rainfall that we do?
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Your contributions support this content. It sounds cliché but it's true. Whether it's travel expenses, vehicle repair, or medical costs for urushiol poisoning (or rockfalls, bee-stings, hand slices, toxic sap, etc), your financial support allows this content to continue so the beauty of Earth's flora can be made accessible to the public, accompanied by a small dose of profanity and crude humor. At a time when so much is disappearing beneath the human footprint, CPBBD is willing to do whatever it takes to document these plant species and the ecological communities they are a part of before they're gone for good.
Plants make people feel good. Plants quell homicidal (and suicidal!) thoughts. To support Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't, consider donating a few bucks to the venmo account "societyishell" or the PayPal account email crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt@gmail.com...
Or consider becoming a patreon supporter @ :
patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt
Buy some CPBBD merch (shirts, hats, hoodies n' what the shit) available for sale at :
bonfire.com/store/crime-pays-but-botany-doesnt
To purchase stickers, venmo 20 bucks to "societyishell" and leave your address in the comments.
Plants ID questions or reading list suggestions can be sent to crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt@gmail.com
Thanks, GFY.
In today's episode, we take a look at the brutal landscape of South Texas Consumer Slums/Heat Islands. The first half of the video is spent deconstructing the landscape of hell, while the second half of the video is spent offering viable solutions to the problems and pathologies examined here.
Here are some great alternatives to the garbage trees being planted in parking lots, commercial centers, and private residential lots in South Texas right now.
Native Street Trees for South Texas Parking Lot Hellscapes...
If only there were even the slightest inclination to use any of our South Texas native leguminous trees in the parking lot hell strips around South Texas, maybe the residents here would have some shade to protect themselves and their cars from the sun and heat. Instead, we get regionally-inappropriate live oaks that destroy the sidewalks and lousy non-native palm trees that don't provide shade.
The native plants in a region define that place. Our relationship with those plants gives us a sense of identity. How we treat those plants in turn reflects back on the way we think of ourselves. People need to stop trying to pretend that they live somewhere else. Stop trying to emulate corny Victorian to English gardens or Spanish colonial crap. You will drain your aquifers (and your financial reserves) doing so.
In Tucson or Phoenix, people are using plants like Palo Verde and Mesquite as street trees and parking lot trees. Why can't we do the same here? Why the insistence on corny palm trees and live oaks from places that get twice the average rainfall that we do?
-----------
Your contributions support this content. It sounds cliché but it's true. Whether it's travel expenses, vehicle repair, or medical costs for urushiol poisoning (or rockfalls, bee-stings, hand slices, toxic sap, etc), your financial support allows this content to continue so the beauty of Earth's flora can be made accessible to the public, accompanied by a small dose of profanity and crude humor. At a time when so much is disappearing beneath the human footprint, CPBBD is willing to do whatever it takes to document these plant species and the ecological communities they are a part of before they're gone for good.
Plants make people feel good. Plants quell homicidal (and suicidal!) thoughts. To support Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't, consider donating a few bucks to the venmo account "societyishell" or the PayPal account email crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt@gmail.com...
Or consider becoming a patreon supporter @ :
patreon.com/CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt
Buy some CPBBD merch (shirts, hats, hoodies n' what the shit) available for sale at :
bonfire.com/store/crime-pays-but-botany-doesnt
To purchase stickers, venmo 20 bucks to "societyishell" and leave your address in the comments.
Plants ID questions or reading list suggestions can be sent to crimepaysbutbotanydoesnt@gmail.com
Thanks, GFY.
