Uploaded December 2025 | Updated September 2026, 1 week ago

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Not a Shitty Christmas, but a Shiddy Christmas... That happens to be shitty..

"Shiddy Christmas" - Collective Variety Crew
Lyrics (Written by Matt G Martin):

I kept fartin' til I shidded
I kept poopin' til I peed
I kept blowing up, the toilet bowl
Under the Christmas Tree

Santa won't be Happy
Santa won't be pleased
When he sees these mounds of poo
He might friggin' freak

Then to my surprise
It's almost like he knew
Pouring down the chim ih nee
Loads and loads of poo...

[Chorus]
Oh, it's gonna be a shiddy Christmas
Is it good or is it bad?
I don't know, but Santas red
Only because he's mad..
Yezzur it's a shiddy Christmas
No presents to be found.
For, on this shiddy Christmas
There's only poo poo around.

I ran outside quickly
And to my surprise,
I look up at the roof top
And can't believe my eyes..

Santa's got his massive ass
Planted on my chimney,
Dropping loads, down below
But that's not all I see..

Each of his furry reindeer
Are spraying shidd around
All over the roof and house,
I can see it pouring down

They must have ate something bad
It was just all liquid poo..
Now it's all just brown around
And there's nothing I can do..

[Chorus]
Oh, it's gonna be a shiddy Christmas
Is it good or is it bad?
I don't know, but Santas red
Only because he's mad..
Yezzur it's a shiddy Christmas
No presents to be found.
For, on this shiddy Christmas
There's only poo poo around.

I call out up to Santa, "What the Hell, You Doin'?"
With a Jolly Laugh,
and loads of crap
He said "Ho, Ho" then shat

Right in my direction,
I dodged out of the way
Da poo poo and da pee pee
Santa tries to spray

Backflips, front flips, summersault
All over, my white lawn
The poop seeped in the snow now
But, it won't do it harm

Like a shit buffet fertilizer
For the plants under the snow
Looking up at Santa,
This bitch has gots to go

[Chorus]
Oh, it's gonna be a shiddy Christmas
Is it good or is it bad?
I don't know, but Santas red
Only because he's mad..
Yezzur it's a shiddy Christmas
No presents to be found.
For, on this shiddy Christmas
There's only poo poo around.

I ran inside to get my gun
Then head right back out
Just scare the fat man away
But then I hear something loud

Clipping clopping and banging
The big guy stomping around
I ran outside, gun in hand
Then he slipped and he fell down

I am no, Scott Calvin
I can't take the lead
Especially in this poo
I don't want your suit, eww e

The reindeer get excited,
Santa gets up, looking down at me
He says, "young man, pooze what we dooze"
Then I saw shit on my hand...

Santa floating back up top
Got back in his sleigh
He said, "Jingle Bell Mother fucker,
Jingle Bell All The Way".

...off into the night.
...I see him vanish off.
...head back inside to see.
...a surprise that made me scoff.
...a chuckle as I notice.
...what Santa had left me.
...12 pack, 4 ply, toilet paper.
...under my Christmas Tree....

#Christmas #Shiddy #Shitty #ShiddyChristmas #cVc #CollectiveVarietyCrew #randumENT #randumEntertainment #Suno #SunoAI