Vance Crowe | During intense conversations, some people can't help but raise their voices. @VanceCrowePodcast | Uploaded July 2024 | Updated October 2024, 3 hours ago.
During intense conversations, some people can't help but raise their voices.
No one likes to be yelled at, but if you find yourself in this situation, there's a simple and frictionless way to lower the volume.
First, it's important to note that I'm not talking about dealing with abusive or drunk people.
People raise their voices all the time, and it's helpful to understand why.
Yelling is psychologically triggered when we feel like we're not being heard.
It signals, "pay attention!" and it is probably paid off for them before, so they don't even realize they're doing it.
The best way to calm a person down is to let them talk. When they're done, instead of pointing out that they're yelling, calmly repeat back for them what you heard them say without judgment or comment. Simply restate what they said.
This is called mirroring.
Mirroring demonstrates that you're attentive and it forces them to have to listen to their own argument.
They will almost certainly lower their voice and may even soften their position after hearing how it sounded coming from someone else.
The next time you're in a loud disagreement. Try mirroring and watch things calm down.
#communication #convo #arguments #talking #negotiation #mirroring
During intense conversations, some people can't help but raise their voices.
No one likes to be yelled at, but if you find yourself in this situation, there's a simple and frictionless way to lower the volume.
First, it's important to note that I'm not talking about dealing with abusive or drunk people.
People raise their voices all the time, and it's helpful to understand why.
Yelling is psychologically triggered when we feel like we're not being heard.
It signals, "pay attention!" and it is probably paid off for them before, so they don't even realize they're doing it.
The best way to calm a person down is to let them talk. When they're done, instead of pointing out that they're yelling, calmly repeat back for them what you heard them say without judgment or comment. Simply restate what they said.
This is called mirroring.
Mirroring demonstrates that you're attentive and it forces them to have to listen to their own argument.
They will almost certainly lower their voice and may even soften their position after hearing how it sounded coming from someone else.
The next time you're in a loud disagreement. Try mirroring and watch things calm down.
#communication #convo #arguments #talking #negotiation #mirroring
