Uploaded December 2022 | Updated September 2026, 1 week ago
Everyone's worst nightmare (or best dream UwU?), you share your information on the internet in order to get a Christmas gift, but you get more, oh so much more.
I'm not even gonna lie, the running anthrax/pipe bomb/sneaking into your house to lick your toes while you sleep gag is hilarious to me, and I'm not sure why. But I sure did do a song about it for this year's Secret Santa.
mp3 available at: https://u.smutty.horse/mklcovuvpvp.mp3
This is the year that I finally
Put the fire to vinyl
Heat proof, with ice in my style
Freeze you in time for revival
Peep you and see through your panties
Creep on my santee and handing
Handies and hoofsies like candies
Fantasy fanart by Fanny
Featuring fetishes: Leafy
Greens groping lettuces
Plus as proven by precedent
Stinky penises prevalent
Cheesy, memey, unseemly
I’m preaching peachy believe me
My genius keeps me upbeating
Plus all these sweets I keep eating
My teeth are rotten I’ve gotten all pudgy
Fudge eating shove in my tummy
Rumcake I’m baking so yummy
Come take the drum diddy dummy
Pa rump pa pa pump up the boombox
Rumchatta come set up the jukebox
Rumchatta and some in my juicebox
Cum gotta cum into these lewd socks
Shoebox of google docs
Printout pictures of nude docks and
Fetlocks, moon horse’s moon makes me swoon
Kung fu you like this was The Boondocks
Hit you like boom and I Zip like Zoom
Hit the room, and I slip right through
Dip, slide move and my dick’s like
Coom in their womb and I get my
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and
Anybody think make you my spouse
Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with
Antibody cream it’s going down, and
Keep calm and I’m gonna
Creep on ya
While ya sleep nonny
Up in your home
No locks or cops
Can cockblock or stop me
Under ya box spring
Watching and clopping
Till Dawn
I’m gonna tiptoe
To your window.
No-clip right into your den so
You’re straight, santee, I’m all bent though
It’s not gay if I act all fem yo
No escape when I mail you a dildo
You meme r4p3 but I’m all real though
Just kidding; I didn’t mean that
Still heads up, might get you a Peanut
No mail; coming dee-rect
Even though it’s not Halloween yet
Santa Pone said I’m too obscene, yep
Rap’s too dirty; I better clean that
Otherwise she’s gonna put me back
On the naughty list for the naughty fags
Or a body bag if I push too hard
So I’m sorry that I took this too far
And I spooked the shark when I shook the floor
Dropping bombs like nukes and I took the board
Fool of a Took and I booked this whore
Named Blizzard Boop and I scooped this chord
Courting these courtesans
All according to corporate
And while I’m driving accords I’ll be
Looking fly as a cormorant
Spicy like coriander
I’m course correcting meandering
My erection’s outstanding
And all these horses demanding
While they forcefully demand my schwing
I’m rambling in from random /b/
Unhand my damn OCs
I’m Loveseat Shambling
I’ll keep on pandering
It’s just a fandom thing
And I’m the fandom king
So let my anthem ring
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and
Anybody think make you my spouse
Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with
Antibody cream it’s going down, and
Keep calm and I’m gonna
Creep on ya
While ya sleep nonny
Up in your home
No locks or cops
Can cockblock or stop me
Under ya box spring
Watching and clopping
Till Dawn
This is the half verse to wrap up
Apples like Hapsburgs in hats but
Sexy like Miss Coco’s ass butt-
Sexing her half up my shaft I’m
Sure that you’re not missing it
Spits got ridiculous
Lyrics hit like pistols in
The fists of old Saint Nicholas
It’s victimless, it’s so benign
In fact I doubt you mind
I’ve padded out the time
Enough now bring that chorus line
Of course and Merry Christmas
I’m here to grant your wishes
Infamous as Icarus
I’ll get too close; I’m gonna visit
(You)
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and
Anybody think make you my spouse
Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with
Antibody cream it’s going down, and
Keep calm and I’m gonna
Creep on ya
While ya sleep nonny
Up in your home
No locks or cops
Can cockblock or stop me
Under ya box spring
Watching and clopping
Till Dawn
Everyone's worst nightmare (or best dream UwU?), you share your information on the internet in order to get a Christmas gift, but you get more, oh so much more.
I'm not even gonna lie, the running anthrax/pipe bomb/sneaking into your house to lick your toes while you sleep gag is hilarious to me, and I'm not sure why. But I sure did do a song about it for this year's Secret Santa.
mp3 available at: https://u.smutty.horse/mklcovuvpvp.mp3
This is the year that I finally
Put the fire to vinyl
Heat proof, with ice in my style
Freeze you in time for revival
Peep you and see through your panties
Creep on my santee and handing
Handies and hoofsies like candies
Fantasy fanart by Fanny
Featuring fetishes: Leafy
Greens groping lettuces
Plus as proven by precedent
Stinky penises prevalent
Cheesy, memey, unseemly
I’m preaching peachy believe me
My genius keeps me upbeating
Plus all these sweets I keep eating
My teeth are rotten I’ve gotten all pudgy
Fudge eating shove in my tummy
Rumcake I’m baking so yummy
Come take the drum diddy dummy
Pa rump pa pa pump up the boombox
Rumchatta come set up the jukebox
Rumchatta and some in my juicebox
Cum gotta cum into these lewd socks
Shoebox of google docs
Printout pictures of nude docks and
Fetlocks, moon horse’s moon makes me swoon
Kung fu you like this was The Boondocks
Hit you like boom and I Zip like Zoom
Hit the room, and I slip right through
Dip, slide move and my dick’s like
Coom in their womb and I get my
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and
Anybody think make you my spouse
Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with
Antibody cream it’s going down, and
Keep calm and I’m gonna
Creep on ya
While ya sleep nonny
Up in your home
No locks or cops
Can cockblock or stop me
Under ya box spring
Watching and clopping
Till Dawn
I’m gonna tiptoe
To your window.
No-clip right into your den so
You’re straight, santee, I’m all bent though
It’s not gay if I act all fem yo
No escape when I mail you a dildo
You meme r4p3 but I’m all real though
Just kidding; I didn’t mean that
Still heads up, might get you a Peanut
No mail; coming dee-rect
Even though it’s not Halloween yet
Santa Pone said I’m too obscene, yep
Rap’s too dirty; I better clean that
Otherwise she’s gonna put me back
On the naughty list for the naughty fags
Or a body bag if I push too hard
So I’m sorry that I took this too far
And I spooked the shark when I shook the floor
Dropping bombs like nukes and I took the board
Fool of a Took and I booked this whore
Named Blizzard Boop and I scooped this chord
Courting these courtesans
All according to corporate
And while I’m driving accords I’ll be
Looking fly as a cormorant
Spicy like coriander
I’m course correcting meandering
My erection’s outstanding
And all these horses demanding
While they forcefully demand my schwing
I’m rambling in from random /b/
Unhand my damn OCs
I’m Loveseat Shambling
I’ll keep on pandering
It’s just a fandom thing
And I’m the fandom king
So let my anthem ring
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and
Anybody think make you my spouse
Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with
Antibody cream it’s going down, and
Keep calm and I’m gonna
Creep on ya
While ya sleep nonny
Up in your home
No locks or cops
Can cockblock or stop me
Under ya box spring
Watching and clopping
Till Dawn
This is the half verse to wrap up
Apples like Hapsburgs in hats but
Sexy like Miss Coco’s ass butt-
Sexing her half up my shaft I’m
Sure that you’re not missing it
Spits got ridiculous
Lyrics hit like pistols in
The fists of old Saint Nicholas
It’s victimless, it’s so benign
In fact I doubt you mind
I’ve padded out the time
Enough now bring that chorus line
Of course and Merry Christmas
I’m here to grant your wishes
Infamous as Icarus
I’ll get too close; I’m gonna visit
(You)
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and
Anybody think make you my spouse
Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with
Antibody cream it’s going down, and
Keep calm and I’m gonna
Creep on ya
While ya sleep nonny
Up in your home
No locks or cops
Can cockblock or stop me
Under ya box spring
Watching and clopping
Till Dawn
