![Bob Kanefsky/Heather Alexander - Creature in the Wood [HQ] @SongsfromtheStars](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wUx5xgJy-qU/maxresdefault.jpg)
Uploaded August 2022 | Updated September 2026, 1 hour ago
Tapeworm I track 12. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: archive.org/details/filk_tapeworm_1
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Lyrics:
I am the creature in the wood,
Prepared to end my spinsterhood.
My song is power and is art.
My song can bind a human heart.
And should thou chance to hear me sing,
My tree will grow our wedding ring.
I shall be thy lover!
My roots run deep into the core:
I am the maiden, bride, and whore,
I am the heart of every home,
I am the siren call to roam.
So end thy nights of fleeting thrill,
And live thy days out on my hill.
I shall be thy lover!
Come unto me, my handsome lad:
I see thee bathing there unclad.
Those roots that drift against thy thighs
May be a dryad’s hands and eyes.
Come eat the nuts fresh from my tree,
As I have tasted the like of thee.
I shall be thy lover!
So deep and strong our love shall grow,
Thy inner secrets I will know.
Thou shalt be happy and be free
To dwell forever in my tree.
I’ll be thy captor and thy slave.
I’ll give thee all that thou might crave.
I shall be thy lover!
La la la...
But love can wither like the leaves,
No matter what the heart believes.
I know the end will always come.
The finest lad grows tiresome...
After a century or two,
I need to look for someone new.
So take your rest upon the hill,
And when the evening shadows spill,
I’ll take you in against the chill.
Then I shall eat and drink my fill!
I’ll try your passion and your skill
And your endurance harder still!
I shall be thy lover!
La la la...
I am the creature in the wood,
Prepared to end my spinsterhood.
My song is power and is art.
My song will bind a human heart.
And when you chance to hear me sing,
Our tree will grow our wedding ring.
I shall be thy lover!
Tapeworm I track 12. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: archive.org/details/filk_tapeworm_1
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lyrics:
I am the creature in the wood,
Prepared to end my spinsterhood.
My song is power and is art.
My song can bind a human heart.
And should thou chance to hear me sing,
My tree will grow our wedding ring.
I shall be thy lover!
My roots run deep into the core:
I am the maiden, bride, and whore,
I am the heart of every home,
I am the siren call to roam.
So end thy nights of fleeting thrill,
And live thy days out on my hill.
I shall be thy lover!
Come unto me, my handsome lad:
I see thee bathing there unclad.
Those roots that drift against thy thighs
May be a dryad’s hands and eyes.
Come eat the nuts fresh from my tree,
As I have tasted the like of thee.
I shall be thy lover!
So deep and strong our love shall grow,
Thy inner secrets I will know.
Thou shalt be happy and be free
To dwell forever in my tree.
I’ll be thy captor and thy slave.
I’ll give thee all that thou might crave.
I shall be thy lover!
La la la...
But love can wither like the leaves,
No matter what the heart believes.
I know the end will always come.
The finest lad grows tiresome...
After a century or two,
I need to look for someone new.
So take your rest upon the hill,
And when the evening shadows spill,
I’ll take you in against the chill.
Then I shall eat and drink my fill!
I’ll try your passion and your skill
And your endurance harder still!
I shall be thy lover!
La la la...
I am the creature in the wood,
Prepared to end my spinsterhood.
My song is power and is art.
My song will bind a human heart.
And when you chance to hear me sing,
Our tree will grow our wedding ring.
I shall be thy lover!
![Bob Kanefsky/Heather Alexander - Creature in the Wood [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wUx5xgJy-qU/mqdefault.jpg "Bob Kanefsky/Heather Alexander - Creature in the Wood [HQ]
Tapeworm I track 12. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_tapeworm_1
Lyrics:
I am the creature in the wood,
Prepared to end my spinsterhood.
My song is power and is art.
My song can bind a human heart.
And should thou chance to hear me sing,
My tree will grow our wedding ring.
I shall be thy lover!
My roots run deep into the core:
I am the maiden, bride, and whore,
I am the heart of every home,
I am the siren call to roam.
So end thy nights of fleeting thrill,
And live thy days out on my hill.
I shall be thy lover!
Come unto me, my handsome lad:
I see thee bathing there unclad.
Those roots that drift against thy thighs
May be a dryad’s hands and eyes.
Come eat the nuts fresh from my tree,
As I have tasted the like of thee.
I shall be thy lover!
So deep and strong our love shall grow,
Thy inner secrets I will know.
Thou shalt be happy and be free
To dwell forever in my tree.
I’ll be thy captor and thy slave.
I’ll give thee all that thou might crave.
I shall be thy lover!
La la la...
But love can wither like the leaves,
No matter what the heart believes.
I know the end will always come.
The finest lad grows tiresome...
After a century or two,
I need to look for someone new.
So take your rest upon the hill,
And when the evening shadows spill,
I’ll take you in against the chill.
Then I shall eat and drink my fill!
I’ll try your passion and your skill
And your endurance harder still!
I shall be thy lover!
La la la...
I am the creature in the wood,
Prepared to end my spinsterhood.
My song is power and is art.
My song will bind a human heart.
And when you chance to hear me sing,
Our tree will grow our wedding ring.
I shall be thy lover!")
![Bill Sutton - Stray Dog Man [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wd2ctZz0Pto/mqdefault.jpg "Bill Sutton - Stray Dog Man [HQ]
Past Due track 03. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_past_due
Lyrics:
Well, Im always bringin home the dogs thats found beside the road
I feed em and I pet em and they keep me on my toes
Well, but now its gone a bit too far, I dont see why its me
That has to take the strays in from the whole damn galaxy!
Chorus:
But Im the stray dog man, and I do what I can
To give them pups some lovin and a home (a home)
But I wish the ones in space would go find another place
And leave me and my doggies here alone!
Well, I was sittin in the backyard in a t-shirt, drinkin a beer
It was a hot and muggy evenin but the sky was crystal clear
When I heard an engine poppin, but there was no one on the lane
So I shrugged and looked to heaven, rubbed my eyes and looked again
There was a kind of flyin pickup with a glow across the back
And as I watched it hover there, out flew this gunny sack
Well, that pickup truck got fuzzy, then it flashed into the sky
That gunny sack bounced off the roof and it landed with a cry
(Chorus)
Well now, Old Rover bounded over and he sniffed around the sack
Then he took off a-runnin and he aint ever comin back!
Well, poor Fido was the next to go, he bit down on that thing
He died before he finished and he started turning green
(Kind of sad, them four legs sticking straight up in the air.)
Well now, that gunny sack it rustled and it opened dark and wide
With the ugliest damn critter that I ever saw inside
Well, it crawled out, stretched, and preened itself, then it ate poor Fido raw
Picked up the tractor and gulped it down, then sat back with a yawn
(Well, by now I was gettin a mite peeved—see, that was a brand new John Deere.)
(Chorus)
Well now, I got a collar on it and I hauled it to the shed
It tried to eat the padlock but I fed it nails instead
Well, it cried all night out there alone, but I knew what to do
I put a clock inside a mitten, but it ate that sucker, too!
(I guess it got kind of hungry when the alarm went off. It was kind of cute when you got to know him, though. I named him Ursa Major—thats cause hes a major pain in the urse.)
Well, I finally got him paper trained and I soon was glad to find
That everywhere that I would go, ol Urse would tag behind
Well, the other dogs accept him now, he eats the ones that fight
The twelve of them are nasty huntin rabbits late at night
(That rabbit thinks hes smart, he hides inside a tree—well, old Urse, he eats the tree!)
(Chorus)
Well now, I thought that was the end of it, but when a month went by
Another flying pickup threw a sack out on the fly
Well, it struggled and it rumbled, then that gunny baggie burst
And the thing that was inside it ate poor Ursa Major first!
Well now, it happens every month or so, and Im getting rather vexed
As soon as I get fond of one, it gets eaten by the next!
So Im buildin me a rocket, next time I see a sack
Im gonna toss it in the nosecone and Ill throw that sucker back!
(Chorus)")
![UnReal Estate 12 - Two Hundred Years On [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xDmV-zDO0gg/mqdefault.jpg "UnReal Estate 12 - Two Hundred Years On [HQ]
Sung by Mitchell Burnside Clapp. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_unreal_estate
Lyrics:
They sent him up from Sydney on a seven-year,
One more reluctant pioneer
With a past that wasnt quite within the law.
They put him in a cell to do his time,
Set him working in a mine
Where greyish clinging dust was all he saw.
When his time was done, in the rock he stayed;
For one more time hed been betrayed,
By his body and a lower gravity.
And the busker singing in the corridor,
He played a song hed heard before—
It went: “Wholl come a-waltzing Matilda with me?”
Spacesuits patched with tape and twine,
Selling drills, his own design,
A trail of regrets to mark where he had been.
And his home hung neatly centered in the airlocks porthole door
An endless black, a distant dream of green.
An exile now from gravity,
No friends to the authority,
He made a life beneath a league of stone.
He married well and raised a son
(The only worthwhile thing hed done),
Today he doesnt feel so much alone.
To put the tucker on the plate,
These days, youll see him navigate
A bus across a desert lunar sea,
And the line runs around inside his head—
Was it something that his father said?
It goes: “Wholl come a-waltzing Matilda with me?”
Billabongs just a frozen pond a hundred meters down
The squatter drives a thoroughbred of steel
And if he runs forever, would his life be all in vain?
At least, thats how it makes him feel.
Still the line runs around inside his head
Was it something that his father said?
It goes: “Wholl come a-waltzing Matilda with me?”
“Waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda,
Wholl come a-waltzing Matilda with me?
Waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda,
Wholl come a-waltzing Matilda with me?”
And the busker singing in the corridor,
He plays a song hes heard before—
It goes: “Wholl come a-waltzing Matilda with me?”")
![Jordin Kare - Car Fire [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xHKXCiy5A90/mqdefault.jpg "Jordin Kare - Car Fire [HQ]
Parody Violation track 17. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_parody_violation
Lyrics (TTTO Star Fire, Cynthia McQuillin):
I sit here knowing credits overdrawn
Surrounded by the ghastly stench that says my engines gone
Charring plastic, burning oil,
End result of all my toil
In these endless, dismal hours before the dawn
Car fire...car fire...
Take my savings to the universe beyond
Ten thousand bucks to buy this shining shell
They built it on a Monday and they did not build it well
And every soul who touched its birth,
If they be still on Earth,
I would set to building Yugos down in Hell
Car fire...car fire...
Its burning neath my hood, I know it well
Car fire...car fire...
Its burning neath my hood, I know that smell")
![Aislinn (Anne Prather) - What the Heck Good is Heaven (If You Dont Have Wings) [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xQv-PHf-EDk/mqdefault.jpg "Aislinn (Anne Prather) - What the Heck Good is Heaven (If You Dont Have Wings) [HQ]
High Wings track 11. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_high_wings
Lyrics:
Oh, people see Heaven as many things (singing oh, hallelujah!)
Full of angels with harps that play and sing (singing oh, hallelujah!)
But when I see an angel I say just one thing
I say, What the heck good are angels if they dont have wings?
Oh, if they dont have wings
Now a well-meaning pastor came up to me
He said, What more could you want from Eternity
Than a voice like yours that rises clear and free
To sing the praises of the Trinity?
Oh, the Persians draw angels that make me cry (singing oh, hallelujah!)
They got skinny little wings thatll never fly (singing oh, hallelujah!)
They may have voices to praise their King,
But I say, What the heck good are angels if they dont have wings?
Oh, real flying wings!
Now the roaring of the jets ought to make it clear
That the kingdom of God is really almost here
Werent airplanes what was meant by the King of Kings
When he promised to raise us up on eagles wings?
Oh, Nirvana is some peoples religious goal (singing oh, hallelujah!)
Enlightenment and union with the cosmic whole (singing oh, hallelujah!)
But Nirvana lacks one important thing
I say, What the heck goods Nirvana if you dont have wings?
Oh, real flying wings!
Now Im talking here about a few barrel rolls, some spins, an Immelmann just to top it all off—a sixteen-point inverted slow roll would be a challenge. This levitation is boring!
Oh, Moronis sitting up there on the Temple heights (singing oh, hallelujah!)
His trumpet pointing out past the city lights (singing oh, hallelujah!)
But Moroni in his beauty lacks just one thing
I say, What the heck goods an angel if he dont have wings?
Oh, if he dont have wings
Now the clean-cut missionary on my doorstep said
You must find the truth or youll be lost when youre dead.
I know where Im going when I finally die
I dont want anybodys Heaven if I cant fly
Oh people see Heaven as many things (singing oh, hallelujah!)
Full of angels with harps that play and sing (singing oh, hallelujah!)
Im glad your view of Heaven is a place that sings,
But I say, What the hell good is Heaven if you dont have wings?
Oh, real flying wings!")
![Frank Hayes - 3 A.M. [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xSEo1TOHIoM/mqdefault.jpg "Frank Hayes - 3 A.M. [HQ]
Dont Ask track 03. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_dont_ask
Lyrics:
A dog is barking at the moon with his eyes turned up toward space
Another joins him very soon in the yard next to your place
You could call their owner on the phone and give him hell also,
But you know theyll stop the second that the fellow says,
“Hello? No, my dogs aint makin no noise.
Hell, no, Lucille and Godzilla are asleep in their doghouse.
Wassamatter? Why you lousy...”
Chorus:
Drip by drip, the faucets leak
Drives you nuts
Drives you nuts
Cats that yowl and walls that creak
Mangy mutts
Noisy mutts
If I had the cash to do it, Id move to Timbuktu
Think about it; so would you
Split splat spluts
Split splat spluts
The neighbors cats in heat again and that probably is why
Shes singing from Aida as old boots go whizzing by
A garbage truck comes down the street with a noise to wake the dead
Theyll take their break and park it eighteen inches from your bed.
“Nah, Charlie. You dont want to shut it off.
It, uh, its fine. Just uh, just let er run.”
(Chorus)
The floor is creaking down below; you hear it, but its faint
Perhaps it is a burglar—then again, perhaps it aint.
The radiator starts to bang, and the plumbing joins the din
Just when you think youve had enough, those dogs start up again!
(Chorus)")
![UnReal Estate 14 - Helvas Song [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xnl4lvlKqTM/mqdefault.jpg "UnReal Estate 14 - Helvas Song [HQ]
Sung by Cecilia Eng. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_unreal_estate
Lyrics:
My sister and my brother ships speak softly by my side,
But I only hear the emptiness of space
And a siren song which calls to me from a burning, white-hot star
Promising oblivion and peace.
Chorus:
And the stars still dance the spiral dance,
And the planets circle far,
But the ship who sang will sing no more
Between the distant stars.
Ill sing no more.
For my love lies dead within me, his voice forever still;
It seems as though my heart will never mend.
The musics died unfinished, his song is at an end,
Well never sing again.
(Chorus)
Now I could turn and fly away, a rogue without a home,
And turn my back on all that we have known,
But a hundred years is far too long to live on nothing more
Than memories and heartache, all alone.
(Chorus)
So here, upon this lonely field, Ill bid my love goodbye.
The honors at his graveside are the best.
And somehow I will find my voice and fill the silent plain,
Yes, Ill sing him to his rest.
And the stars still dance the spiral dance,
And the planets circle far,
And the ship who sang will sing once more
Between the distant stars.
Ill sing once more.
And the ship who sang will sing once more
Between the distant stars.
Ill sing once more.")
![Technical Difficulties - Dedication [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xyCDhioHBSw/mqdefault.jpg "Technical Difficulties - Dedication [HQ]
Please Stand By track 06. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_please_stand_by/
Lyrics:
Seven names to represent the whole damn human race (seven names)
Seven who died reaching for space (as we reach for space)
Others will fly
In that tempting void that waits beyond the sky
We’ll control the lightning once again (we’ll control the lightning)
Stars have ever beckoned men to reach for higher things (higher things)
Stars for which we try with homemade wings (with our wings we soar)
Time is our friend
As we try and fail and try and never bend
We’ve controlled the lightning and the wind
Once we sailed o’er the seas, slave to tide and breeze
Guided by the stars we seek to know
And to further our schemes lay the mother world of dreams
Smiling even as we turned to go
Cradle world that brought us forth beneath our warming sun (warming sun)
Cradle world of life that’s just begun (as we begin)
Watch as we grow
In the face of hate and strife and hammer blow
We’ll control the lightning once again
We’ll control the lightning once again
We’ll control the lightning once again
We’ll control the lightning once again
We will control the lightning again")
![Frank Hayes - Cosmos [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yEoHMz_55V8/mqdefault.jpg "Frank Hayes - Cosmos [HQ]
Dont Ask track 17. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_dont_ask/
Lyrics:
Theres a hole in the middle of it all
Theres a hole in the middle of it all
Theres a hole, theres a hole, theres a hole in the middle of it all.
Now, the Bang caused the hole in the middle of it all
The Bang caused the hole in the middle of it all
Theres a hole, theres a hole, theres a hole in the middle of it all.
And theres a void where the Bang caused the hole in the middle of it all...
And there is nothing in the void where the Bang caused the hole in the middle of it all...
And now Im looking for the nothing in the void where the Bang caused the hole in the middle of it all...
And Ill get government funding for looking for the nothing in the void where the Bang caused the hole in the middle of it all...
And Ill get a book contract and a TV show with the government funding for looking for the nothing in the void where the Bang caused the hole in the middle of it all...
And Ill make BILLIONS AND BILLIONS from the book contract and the TV show with the government funding for looking for the nothing in the void where the Bang caused the hole in the middle of it all...
Assuming the theory holds...theres a hole in the middle of it all!")
![Leslie Fish & the Dehorn Crew - Ramboing [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yU4ujvTZLIw/mqdefault.jpg "Leslie Fish & the Dehorn Crew - Ramboing [HQ]
Its Sister Jennys Turn to Throw the Bomb track 14. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_its_sister_jennys_turn_to_throw_the_bomb
Find more of Leslie Fishs music at: https://lesliefish.bandcamp.com/
Lyrics:
For all the ills that plague mankind, there is a certain cure
For neighbors rude and rowdy and for prigs sublime and pure,
For holier-than-thous and nasty children by the store,
There is one man who shows the way, salvation is his store.
Chorus:
So let us go a-Ramboing among the live grenades,
Yes, let us go a-Ramboing, all lively youths and maids.
With an Uzi in the left hand and machete in the right,
O let us go a-Ramboing out on the town tonight!
Your boss is full of fertilizer, but hes still the boss,
You therefore labor mightily to his gain and your loss.
He hassles and torments you, nags and plagues you day and night;
Take heart, O pilgrim, there is hope, redemption is in sight.
(Chorus)
And as for politicians, well, need anymore be said?
Their fingers are all in the till, their skulls are made of lead.
Youll never vote the bastards out, for guess who runs the game,
And no use yelling for the law, the cops are just the same.
(Chorus)
Your neighbor mows his lawn at 3 a.m. on Sunday morn
And thanks to him you often wish that you were never born,
Especially when, after hours and one too many brews,
He alternates Ms. Dolly P. with polka tunes and blues.
(Chorus)
Your neighbors children play their wars at most unholy hours
And recreate Guadalcanal among your shrubs and flowers.
They decorate your trees with tissue normally found on rolls
And excavate your driveway like so many little moles.
(Chorus)
Your other neighbor has been saved and wants to save you too;
Hell gladly tell you endlessly exactly what to do.
Just put your soul into his hands, youll go and sin no more,
Dont drink or smoke or anything, but be (like him) a bore.
(Chorus)
Sweet polite persuasion here will bring you no relief,
For those who yield to reason arent the kind that cause you grief.
So when youve had it up to here, and fear youll grow unhinged,
Its no more Mr. Nice Guy, lets go out and get revenge.
(Chorus)
Yes, there is a solution to the grafter, bore, and prude,
The idiot who bosses you, the neighbor brute and rude.
Just take up arms against the sea of troubles, toil, and fuss,
Whats good enough for the new John Wayne is good enough for us!
(Chorus)")
![UnReal Estate 07 - Songs of Distant Earth [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yjbLIqHmqnc/mqdefault.jpg "UnReal Estate 07 - Songs of Distant Earth [HQ]
Sung by Bill Roper. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_unreal_estate
Lyrics:
The melody is over, the last transmission done,
The cool of Earth is turned to flame with the dying of the Sun.
The nova flare will burn away the world of mankinds birth
And fire will be the ending of the songs of distant Earth.
The sentence was pronounced: the death of Earth would come,
The Sun burn briefly bright, all historyd be done,
And all the things they cared for, the laughter and the tears,
Be ended by the novas flame in fifteen hundred years.
But although die they must, man might outlive his home:
The stars were waiting there, with planets of their own.
The telescopes peered outward; the probes were sent to fly,
To seek a world that they might seed, that mankind need not die.
No man of Earth may walk beneath a foreign sun,
But the seedships sent their life; a new race has begun.
On twenty worlds weve gathered, the human voice grows strong,
And we carry on their writing, their poetry, their song.
The melody is over, but the echoes linger on
From the seeds of life they planted gainst the dying of the Sun.
The echos growing stronger as it calls of mans rebirth
And a score of worlds are singing now the songs of distant Earth.")
![Jordin Kare - Melodies So Deep [HQ]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yo_A26GyhM0/mqdefault.jpg "Jordin Kare - Melodies So Deep [HQ]
Parody Violation track 12. Thanks to rocketman0739 for providing high-quality versions of these songs.
Download the album here: https://archive.org/details/filk_parody_violation
Lyrics (TTTO Dragons in the Deep, Cynthia McQuillin):
Melodies so deep,
A basss life is cheap
And even songs in key of C
May hide a deadly enemy
We pray the gods protect our throats
If we should try to hit those notes")
