Uploaded July 2017 | Updated September 2026, 10 hours ago
He has all that time and opportunity to bash my fucking skull into mashed potatoes but just stumbles and shuffles off like a mong because the boss fight ended and he had to leave instead.
He has all that time and opportunity to bash my fucking skull into mashed potatoes but just stumbles and shuffles off like a mong because the boss fight ended and he had to leave instead.

![Captain Novolin Deathless Speedrun [SNES, 1992]
Its not really a speedrun, and certainly not in any serious context, but this game is something of an endless joke for some of us and by some miracle also winds up being very short.
So of course this shit happened.
Jesus god almighty this game has some of the worst hit detection imaginable, but at least it works both ways with that feature; at times youll go to jump on an enemy only to take damage yourself, then youll find yourself killing foes by leaping into them side-on. How does this work? Why does this work?
Who gives a fuck?
Games awful. Not the absolute worst in the SNES library but definitely far from being anything close to good. And that music! Fucking hell!
(I tried to get the CHECK YOU FEET message to appear but even by the fifth attempt it wasnt happening so I just gave up on that and finished the game instead. Oh well.) Captain Novolin Deathless Speedrun [SNES, 1992]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NAMSHOQXJgE/mqdefault.jpg)






![[Angry Animal Noises]
Lizardman cant reach his food while it tickles him to death. [Angry Animal Noises]](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Poby1VJC5xo/mqdefault.jpg)

