Pit Crew(So much for synchronized uploads! We try.) The way cringecore should be listened to! Squeaky voices and fast tempo! A nightcored version of: youtu.be/nMRLR-ShX2M
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
Draw Motherfucker, Draw Motherfucker, Draw Hooves on the holster, coaster on the bar Go, sir, on your mark Get ready, get set, start The melody on the spark Spaghetti up in the pockets Ready to talk, got pages up in my moleskin Pedal to the floor and all four hooves coastin Plan in motion, solely postin boll-shi OC Mary Sue fanfic then I ghost bitch Chrimmus past future Get your ass to the Front of class grab the chalkboard Scratch to it Now doodle like your name was Selenophile I mean I take the piss with my tunes im a demon child Call me Cozy Glow And when I chose this show I could’ve only known Where this approach would go All my Cs are O and all my Gs are O I’m the OG OC holy smokes
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
Way to based to trace shit from Hasbro Way to dang wasted to make this from scratch tho Pay comish to a chick from the chat blow Half the damn paycheck on OCs and jack off Slap a horn onto her face, she’s an alicorn Saved Equestria from Discord ima warn you Ima stay for porn too, courtesy of morons who Dig my scenecore cutie so you better learn to Like her, love her lust for her Freckles on her butt fuck it I’m a bust a nut for her Write a new chapter in her fanfic to fap to Where she goes lesbian for applejack and dash too Cum, feel shame store it in the back too How could I do it to my pure sweet ROUND TWO Buck it she’s a full grown mare I swear the dappled flanks plus face ain’t no fair
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
You can fuckin chalk it up to Me bein chuckles in a slut For these multicolored butts Man I love em White knuckles on the keys and A hundred different DMs Talkin to my artists put a target on OCs friend Grodie on the Kirin Gobi on the ears and Floral shitpost on the cards for the year send- Pictures to Celestia Twiggles and the rest of ya Color scheme guaranteed Banned from Equestria Let my obsession impress The competition I guess the best decisions To flex instead of listen She’s a mess on a mission In a dress in the kitchen Bitch it ain’t misogynistic If she’s pro tradition She’s my little puritanical into Yuri, tentacles Kirby, Antonymph and Tradwife girly manacles Multihued and moltin too New dragonfly wings like a brood of Changelings She containing multitudes
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
Alchemystra Hopefang Nightcore - MLP Cringecore MusicPit Crew2024-09-03 | (So much for synchronized uploads! We try.) The way cringecore should be listened to! Squeaky voices and fast tempo! A nightcored version of: youtu.be/nMRLR-ShX2M
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
Draw Motherfucker, Draw Motherfucker, Draw Hooves on the holster, coaster on the bar Go, sir, on your mark Get ready, get set, start The melody on the spark Spaghetti up in the pockets Ready to talk, got pages up in my moleskin Pedal to the floor and all four hooves coastin Plan in motion, solely postin boll-shi OC Mary Sue fanfic then I ghost bitch Chrimmus past future Get your ass to the Front of class grab the chalkboard Scratch to it Now doodle like your name was Selenophile I mean I take the piss with my tunes im a demon child Call me Cozy Glow And when I chose this show I could’ve only known Where this approach would go All my Cs are O and all my Gs are O I’m the OG OC holy smokes
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
Way to based to trace shit from Hasbro Way to dang wasted to make this from scratch tho Pay comish to a chick from the chat blow Half the damn paycheck on OCs and jack off Slap a horn onto her face, she’s an alicorn Saved Equestria from Discord ima warn you Ima stay for porn too, courtesy of morons who Dig my scenecore cutie so you better learn to Like her, love her lust for her Freckles on her butt fuck it I’m a bust a nut for her Write a new chapter in her fanfic to fap to Where she goes lesbian for applejack and dash too Cum, feel shame store it in the back too How could I do it to my pure sweet ROUND TWO Buck it she’s a full grown mare I swear the dappled flanks plus face ain’t no fair
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
You can fuckin chalk it up to Me bein chuckles in a slut For these multicolored butts Man I love em White knuckles on the keys and A hundred different DMs Talkin to my artists put a target on OCs friend Grodie on the Kirin Gobi on the ears and Floral shitpost on the cards for the year send- Pictures to Celestia Twiggles and the rest of ya Color scheme guaranteed Banned from Equestria Let my obsession impress The competition I guess the best decisions To flex instead of listen She’s a mess on a mission In a dress in the kitchen Bitch it ain’t misogynistic If she’s pro tradition She’s my little puritanical into Yuri, tentacles Kirby, Antonymph and Tradwife girly manacles Multihued and moltin too New dragonfly wings like a brood of Changelings She containing multitudes
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra HopefangFun Time - Pinkie Pie FanmusicPit Crew2025-02-06 | Reuploaded because the three second looping gif of Pinkie Pie in the last one apparently merited a copyright claim, and the appeal was denied. Pit Crew isn't even monetized or anything, dang.
No witty banter on this one. Written in a hard time, when it felt like even the things I love the most were dragging me down. The important thing, my dear friends, is to remember that you have folks who care about you, that no hard time lasts forever, and you're always allowed to be happy again, no matter where you find your heart at the moment.
mp3 available for download here: https://u.smutty.horse/mledsrtkdwl.mp3
Sitting on the floor in sugarcube corner, Smile’s gone and the laughter has worn her out Where’s the warmth the yovidaphone hornist? Gone with the moment, and gone with the mornin’ N’ sun’s up, Seems the time for the fun’s up Party of one Sweep the crumbs up, And thumbs up Never let em’ down Never fuck up, you dumdum Ev’rypony needs someone to hug em N You’re someone So, Hooves out Give this damn world a bear hug, Mare hug, don’t you dare quit Shoulders squared up Cubed up the truth is Your battered and bruised but You’re not even used up By half, you’re a huge one Face the deluge with no raft and No life jacket Just a rubber duck you stole from the bathtub You might hack it, you might not Fuck, damn drown down in the white rapids But as your gaspin' on this water you’re gonna die laughin'.
Come on everypony, Smile, smile! Fill the world up with sunshine, sunshine. Every step is a Mile, mile When the motherfuck can she unwind, unwind? Don’t got nothin if you don’t got style, You can sleep with the sunshine, sunshine. Brain broke and the world went wild; Just pretend it’s a fun time, fun time.
Carefully curated commentary, Calm and steady. Collect of the day, Whether or not your ready, Hot and heavy. Optimistic, first thing in the morning: That’s what the fuck you’re getting. Open her mouth and hope comes out like vomit. (Mom’s spaghetti.) Back on the rock form, that’s where she taught herself that the world was pretty, Maybe dark and hard and modeled in a washed out brush with fifty Shades of maudlin. Would have been so easy just to leave these Dreams she’s coddling, But this is Ponka Pink she bottled them, And drank those dreams up with a silly straw like vodka, when She sings her silly songs that’s when she’s strongest, At her Ponkest. But she can only go so long; The parties leave her somnolent, And argue with biology, But it’s too hard she’s spent. It’s so damn exhausting: burning Fuel she didn’t know she had, and Sweet as sugar frosting, Even when her heart is hurtin' bad. She can bend and bend, But she can never break, Even when the voices in her Tell her every word she says is fake.
Come on everypony, Smile, smile! Fill the world up with sunshine, sunshine. Every step is a Mile, mile When the motherfuck can she unwind, unwind? Don’t got nothin if you don’t got style; You can sleep with the sunshine, sunshine. Brain broke and the world went wild; Just pretend it’s a fun time, fun time.
What if the real her is The one that’s real hurt? What if the way she feels Can steal her? And if the smile drops Who even is she? Cause that’s the bedrock Of her identity. If this is Pinkie Pie Then why the fuck is she cryin? Is she lying to everyone With every smile? And has she always been? Is that her whole life? And if she’s not now Will she ever be alright?
Come on everypony, Smile, smile! Fill the world up with sunshine, sunshine. Every step is a Mile, mile When the motherfuck can she unwind, unwind? Don’t got nothin if you don’t got style You can sleep with the sunshine, sunshine Brain broke and the world went wild Just pretend it’s a fun time, fun timeNaughty List - Horsemas MusicPit Crew2024-12-22 | A song for the 2024 /mlp/ Secret Santa. I had a lot of fun with this one.
You know what I think? I think we’re running outta steam Better grab the shovel and the coal and a couple memes Never felt better is the whole damn philosophy Better laugh a little if I don’t wanna fuckin scream Heaven knows that’s as good as any etymology Guess that’s why Santa called me Chuckles back in 18 Sex, silly songs and a present lemme set the scene Cheer is the target and I’m charging up my laser beam Half fuckin crazy, daily with the greatest wife Heart pumping veins be straining when her lazy eyes Facing my way cause lately I’ve been breaking my Basic arrangements just tryna stay alive Balls to walls. My Hoof is to the heckin floor. We about to stall, so we cant wait a second more Better post the haul, the pictures and the presents or Ima roast your balls, that ain’t a fuckin metaphor It’s incredi-bo Scratch that, inedible Cum in the better bowl Know that’s my fetish though This ain’t the chronicals of narnia Where Santa Claus brings all of ya A gift, it’s just me and these bionicles Chain around my neck reppin sonichu Rainbow Dash and sonic booms Shopping Target cloppin smokin chronic too Hot cocoa with cool whip or barbasol Santee wanted shimmer, so I got the kid some Barbie dolls Paint the fuckers yellow with a can off Krylon aerosol Spin these ponies round like I’m vinyl on a carousel Care about these carols if I have to fucking care at all Tearing off my bra and panties dammit I’ma bare it all
Four hooves with a body this Mare gon’ Force you on the naughty list Swear son Porn groove with a hotty it’s Bare bones Horse tunes so I kinda don’ Care tho
Hop to it miss Gotta sock it to em with Christmas With a quickness Like a spit blitz Sinister minister symbols and semaphore Sippin a Guinness and tickle my penis or Pen it’s a metaphor. It’s a medical menace like needles or people in Canada Slicker than slippery, driven by misery Misinformation and missing a limit each Picture and pickle I’m picking like Peter And pushing my pipes to appoint punctuation Hopping on Pinterest. Hacking the craft like it’s criminal mischief Till I’m their losing interest And turning the jets gonna finish by Christmas Barely on the wagon-taking drags on A cigarette a fag-thank goodness that I’ve got this fuckin dragon This letter chad CardSlut and never had A better lad Don the fuzzy letter jacket, sweater hat and Climbing down the chimney just to reminisce About the friends we Made along the way Plus the enemies Turn em into maids And sweep, sweep Like rarity’s boutique-tique Sleeping til the day Playing keep away with the freaks these Peeps they want a treat each Leaf around my tree goes in wreaths see Saw waves, blades well buck it’s all the same You wanna fuckin play Stomp, sway So merry gentlemares never rest a wink Just grab yourself a drink And drink until you're puking in the sink All my freaking pegasisters spread your wings We’ll wrap it up in spring Til then, I wanna see you people sing
Four hooves with a body this Mare gon’ Force you on the naughty list Swear son Porn groove with a hotty it’s Bare bones Horse tunes so I kinda don’ Care thoPumpkin Pulps Pumpkin Patch - MLP OC MusicPit Crew2024-12-09 | Some Secret Santa music! Gospel music is fun even if I have to sing 20 layers!Friendship Is Pink Toys - My Little Pony MusicPit Crew2024-11-03 | Oh boy! You're gonna need to forgive some barebones editing on this one, it do be Santa Season, and I'm not giving this video a bunch of work. Big ol' thanks to Chompy for coming in on the hook!
I know it's bad form to criticize your own stuff publicly, but although I'm satisfied with this, I generally feel like the more cursing there is in a song the more obviously its lyrics need polishing, and I swear altogether too much in this song. I suppose that's what happens when you're crunching for a deadline, since this was done for one of the Busty's get-togethers. Also, I reckon the third verse probably needs to be cut...buuuuuut I couldn't be arsed tonight. I've got to go write a gospel music song about a goo pony!
A’ight Chuck! Gotta show em that you’re a real hard nut. No more of this cringecore stuff. Gotta stay tough. No more ponies. No more horses. Gotta stay focused on the verses. Nopony can take you seriously out hear, y hear? Aight here comes the drop, No mlp, no clop, no matter what,
Make em believe you’re a hot product.
That’s One step, just a little one But a giant leap for the gentlemen Fuck Hennessy only drink horse linamint Til my ass gets tanked-Tiananmen Fuck squares, motherfuck being there I’m like Schrodinger's cool cat Don’t fuckin care If my ass breathes air Or a rap beat That means strapping in cleats Like an athlete At least Half breed and I’m half obscene Half inner demons and half deceased Bring it back to fucking Scrodingers half pussy Am I dead or alive with a rap disease With a trap wife packing massive feet And I rack slides, slapping magazines With a jack knife cappin’ cats in streets Oh gosh I’m fucking lying I fap to these Applejack thighs Fluttershy’s happy squees Pinkie Pies pies pies that’s a masterpiece My fucking my like disaster scenes Life’s like Katrina, catastrophe Better call FEMA, no actually Better not, since we caught them in action see If we learned anything since they jacked Orleans The only worse agency is Hasbro's team
Now the motherbuckin hook didn’t sound very good Without a little bridge here to darken up the mood Drop the bass in to the beat everypony stomp your hooves Motherfuckers on your feet, let me see your asses move
My Little Pony, friendship and pink toys Stable full of waifus, futas and twink boys Hit em with the beat and the whole kitchen sink noise Get em on they feet with the Macintosh deep voice My little Pony, Harmony n Magic Rarity a hoe, and you know she into wack shit Up inside the bedroom, Luna is a bad bitch And I wanna coom inside a Rainbow Dash kids
Three to the one from the one To the twenty ten You can call me Trixie See? I begin again Wait this the same rhyme scheme What an idiot I don’t got enough time for this I ain’t Eminem Better mix it up, pick it up, better switch it up Get out there and smash bros You can call me Jigglypuff Writing FlutterDash prose Shits getting serious Even Littlepip’s ass lookin bi-curious Lyrics: injurious Spirit: Impervious Sittin’ on my golden throne Feeling: Imperious Various flows, and I go multifarious Marry, hold close, poke nose: hilarious Think I’m gregarious? Kid I’m just fairy gold All an illusion to cover up the scary old Hermit like Zecora, a witch, Triss Merigold Skipped LittlePip just to marry a Gary clone Very own wife: kind eyes, iron thighs Activates fight or flight, every time that she smiles Her design: iodine-heals my heart and my mind Kiss her and my fever like 110 Farenheit That’s about 40 for the rest of you motherheckin Rick and Morty, wait, gosh damn that’s the wrong fandom Little Pony stans, what I meant to say And I’m allowed to say it; I was born this way
My Little Pony, friendship and pink toys Stable full of waifus, futas and twink boys Hit em with the beat and the whole kitchen sink noise Get em on they feet with the Macintosh deep voice My little Pony, Harmony n Magic Rarity a hoe, and you know she into wack shit Up inside the bedroom, Luna is a bad bitch And I wanna coom inside a Rainbow Dash kids
Yes well, wrapping up and rolling out I’d make a Transformers reference but I dunno shit about it Red and blue guy is Optimus Prime And I pretty sure that at the time of writing he had died And i didn’t give a shit Cause he ain’t a little pastel Pony with the cutie mark Plastered on his ass well Ride in on your waifu Throw her in the trash pail Celly like, “Bitch let’s fly to the castle.”
My Little Pony, friendship and pink toys Stable full of waifus, futas and twink boys Hit em with the beat and the whole kitchen sink noise Get em on they feet with the Macintosh deep voice My little Pony, Harmony n Magic Rarity a hoe, and you know she into wack shit Up inside the bedroom, Luna is a bad bitch And I wanna coom inside a Rainbow Dash kids
Eeyup(The Mare With) Bubbles On Her Butt - My Little Pony Music by ChucklesPit Crew2024-10-12 | Oh boy pony music! I love Derpy so gosh dang much, guys. She fills me with joy and happiness and just makes the world better. I love to see her resilience, making mistakes but getting through them and over them, facing tough moments and choosing to overcome. It's inspiring and I love it. This is just a cutesy song for her. Hey, I know the mix maybe isn't spot on. I'm not the best at sound design, but it' Secret Santa season, so I'm already stealing time from the event, and also what better song to be a little, y'know, imperfect. One sweet story, the name Derperella J Muffins comes from a short voice clip that Tabitha St. Germaine did a few years ago for a friend, telling him about all the ways that things might not always be perfect, but sometimes those trials lead to exciting new things, and that we just need to keep putting one hoof in front of the other and remember that we got this.
She’s got bubbles in her soul Bubbles in her heart And you know she’s got a lot of bubbles on her butt Things are going wrong She don’t know what’s up And I can’t get enough The mare with bubbles on her butt
Get back from the mail route, settles in Verifiably a letter flying veteran Wings hurt, hooves hurt, Grab the kettle n’ Tea bags, muffin tin That’s the best medicine Blueberries in the batter Nothing else matters Thoughts scatter Fill the house with laughter And she’s humming to herself Pulling sugar from the shelf Topsy-turvy Might fly backwards I lack words For how she makes me feel And she’s healing every part of me The chapters Of the story she reveals She’s a Silly, sweet dichotomy Me oh my When I see her fly With her wings spread wide In the evening sky No matter what the trouble is I know how to cover it I’m just gonna cuddle this Snuggle miss Bubbles
-in her soul Bubbles in her heart And you know she’s got a lot of bubbles on her butt Things are going wrong She don’t know what’s up And I can’t get enough The mare with bubbles on her butt
I know the world can be a little wild Truth told I just want to see her smile And hold her close and stroke her mane a while So she knows I’ll be with her through any trial Through any tribulation To any destination No matter what went wrong, With love and peace and patience And even if she doesn’t always get it right I’ll be by her side Deperella J Muffins, She was meant for lovin Huggin and Her eyes are like an oven And ice is just a season It’s just another reason to Cuddle by the fire and Lie between her wings and Blowing bubbles on her bubble wand Snuggle till the break of dawn Take a little break and make another song To sing when she’s feeling blue… Best Pony, Miss Derpy Hooves
-in her soul Bubbles in her heart And you know she’s got a lot of bubbles on her butt Things are going wrong She don’t know what’s up And I can’t get enough The mare with bubbles on her butt
In her eyes I see the endless skies Of friendship tinted lives A princess lifted high A gift to call my own A gold and silver pone And she can love the world Atop her muffin throne
She’s got bubbles in her soul Bubbles in her heart And you know she’s got a lot of bubbles on her butt Things are going wrong She don’t know what’s up And I can’t get enough The mare with bubbles in her soul Bubbles in her heart And you know she’s got a lot of bubbles on her butt Things are going wrong She don’t know what’s up And I can’t get enough The mare with bubbles on her buttAlchemystra Hopefang - My Little Pony OC Cringecore MusicPit Crew2024-09-03 | I always thought the OC from Cringe OC Anthem turned out kinda cute, so here's a follow-up song for her. Mind you, in real cringecore fashion, I'm personally of the opinion that the real version is, in fact the nightcore version. Here: youtu.be/waanmCvKu1Q
Thank you, as always to ArwenCuack for the incredible art. Find more of her stuff here: The artwork done by the ever-talented ArwenCuack, who you can find here: twitter.com/ArwenCuack ko-fi.com/arwencuack/commissions
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
Draw Motherfucker, Draw Motherfucker, Draw Hooves on the holster, coaster on the bar Go, sir, on your mark Get ready, get set, start The melody on the spark Spaghetti up in the pockets Ready to talk, got pages up in my moleskin Pedal to the floor and all four hooves coastin Plan in motion, solely postin boll-shi OC Mary Sue fanfic then I ghost bitch Chrimmus past future Get your ass to the Front of class grab the chalkboard Scratch to it Now doodle like your name was Selenophile I mean I take the piss with my tunes im a demon child Call me Cozy Glow And when I chose this show I could’ve only known Where this approach would go All my Cs are O and all my Gs are O I’m the OG OC holy smokes
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
Way to based to trace shit from Hasbro Way to dang wasted to make this from scratch tho Pay comish to a chick from the chat blow Half the damn paycheck on OCs and jack off Slap a horn onto her face, she’s an alicorn Saved Equestria from Discord ima warn you Ima stay for porn too, courtesy of morons who Dig my scenecore cutie so you better learn to Like her, love her lust for her Freckles on her butt fuck it I’m a bust a nut for her Write a new chapter in her fanfic to fap to Where she goes lesbian for applejack and dash too Cum, feel shame store it in the back too How could I do it to my pure sweet ROUND TWO Buck it she’s a full grown mare I swear the dappled flanks plus face ain’t no fair
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra Hopefang
You can fuckin chalk it up to Me bein chuckles in a slut For these multicolored butts Man I love em White knuckles on the keys and A hundred different DMs Talkin to my artists put a target on OCs friend Grodie on the Kirin Gobi on the ears and Floral shitpost on the cards for the year send- Pictures to Celestia Twiggles and the rest of ya Color scheme guaranteed Banned from Equestria Let my obsession impress The competition I guess the best decisions To flex instead of listen She’s a mess on a mission In a dress in the kitchen Bitch it ain’t misogynistic If she’s pro tradition She’s my little puritanical into Yuri, tentacles Kirby, Antonymph and Tradwife girly manacles Multihued and moltin too New dragonfly wings like a brood of Changelings She containing multitudes
Fairy wings plus the vampire fangs Too late to ever change Sparkles up in her mane Cringecore gosh dang No cynics up where she hang The minute that she’s arranged Gosh damn the game change No chains, no brains, no shame Silly name, filly came To rave until the day With the OC gang And the only thang That’s left is to bang with Alchemystra HopefangHero - Fallout Equestria RapPit Crew2024-07-03 | Sat on this one for a few weeks, but we're getting it out there eventually! I'm finally through the big FoE stories now, having done the original, Project Horizons, Pink Eyes, Murky Number Seven and now Heroes. Now I've just got to find some other good side stories. Had a lot of fun doing the lyrics for this one; it's always fun to write something in an accent and explore new possibilities. My favorite I think was, "Hmmm, I need a good long 'a' rhyme to go with 'hey'...of course! 'Feet!'" The accent, of course, taken from Equestria Narrator's wonderful coverage of the series, which you can find here: youtu.be/sSEQqApx5CY?si=YlmrqSXv07Qgl--b The artwork done by the ever-talented ArwenCuack, who you can find here: twitter.com/ArwenCuack ko-fi.com/arwencuack/commissions
I’m the hero of the wasteland Take a shotgun to the face and Shake it off baby todays plans Don’t involve me getting laid dead Minotaur trying to lay hands But I’ve got a better replacement Wires and iron, my dang leg Connects and your ass gonna face plant My plans involving no Friendship or harmony Honest to goddess Iconic with subtlety Call it ironic A shot to the bonnet Leaves me with a Marvelous optical monocle Darn it You think if I want it Then all of these chronic face injuries could be avoided Well honey I might be moronic But put me in stomping range And you’ll be a goner
Hi team! I’m the hero here in Paradise Might seem My demeanour isn’t very nice (but if you’ve seen) What I’ve seen Then I swear you’d be aware that life’s Mean, And I have highbeam cybernetic laser eyes
Nose to nose with the steel rangers They’re the one’s here in real danger This wasteland needs a gay saviour And hay man, that’s what I’m made for Touch serenity face my anger You’ll be living in great pain for Bout a second then your brain’ll Paint the drapes in gray vapor Caped crusader or crazed raider Put em all down with a haymaker Punch first and pray later Kickin in doors like “Hey, neighbor!” Frankly I’m in great shape, Not counting the bullets or blades, thanks Once you can look past my face, hey Only prosthetics are two of my feet I’ll clean up this sin city N’ anypony who ain’t friendly Gonna meet with a grim n’ grisly End when they contend with me Last name of Gun, first Hired Army of one, and I’m wired Ready to burn like a Wild Fire Time to run, and I’m tired Can’t a mare just take damn nap Without getting captured and handicapped? Making me think out my plans n tactics, “Kill em all.” Fantastic. Back in the day they said friendship is magic But now I’m grenading a balefire catapult Strapped to my back on my saddle and tapping the Trigger so call me a madmare or radical
Hi team! I’m the hero here in Paradise Might seem My demeanour isn’t very nice (but if you’ve seen) What I’ve seen Then I swear you’d be aware that life’s Mean, And I have highbeam cybernetic laser eyes
I’m seeing ghosts but mostly Makin em Cutting it close these colts I’m Taking ‘em Ready to roll, filly in tow Flare is a whole other level of Hoe- Ly smokes And cuddling colts I’m totally broken Doped up opium toking Hope I can roll with the blows Drop into SATS and I’m living in Slow Mo So! Gimme dat Med X Oh! I’m seeing red-next Foe! Put em in bed rest Go Hit em with lead legs Feeling horrendous Popping syringes Choking on friendship Like it’s oranges Rifles and wrenches Right to the finish Locking your door And I’ll kick in the hinges Just you wait I’m on a date with Haze Hate to say I’m Feelin gay for days Maybe crazy hay But to escape malaise I’ll take a break from hatred While I chase the day Pray to Luna while I Play my tunes I’m gonna Draw and shoot like it was High Noon Since I saw Foundation in a tight noose I’ve been breaking faces and my sights true Cut loose on a whiskey binge Only way I can forget my sins Is when I’m high as enclave Raptor’s I’ll shave Chapters off these Bastards y’all Call me a megaspell ready to spark Sun in my eyes while I live in the dark Puttin the horse behind the cart, ‘Cause doll the game was rigged from the start
Hi team! I’m the hero here in Paradise Might seem My demeanour isn’t very nice (but if you’ve seen) What I’ve seen Then I swear you’d be aware that life’s Mean, And I have highbeam cybernetic laser eyesFriends In Maretime Bay - My Little Pony FanmusicPit Crew2024-04-29 | Still not dead. Not quite yet anyway. Something of a spiritual sequel to Sunnytime Vibes, because sometimes when you're a bit down and out you need a pretty orange pony to give you some hope and remind you that, hey, you aren't alone out there.
__ Alarm clock plays, gonna be her day, solar rays Hair braid, dope shades, strap on roller blades She’s headed out the lighthouse, Spread the joy and light out, Meeting every morning with a hopeful face.
She’s got a Sunny smile She’s got a Sunny soul And always happy to help you know you’re not alone Her heart is hope And she’s hoping that you’ll hear her say You have friends You have friends in Maretime Bay
Little hooves, lighting lanterns by the moonlight, Paper balloons, see her smile as it takes flight Her dad says she’s a dreamer And he can see it in her eyes But he’s a true believer And says he’s always here to help her shine. He taught her “Sunny we can do our part.” And make things better say it, “Hoof to Heart” With friends to call your own You’ll never be alone Even if I cannot be there when you’re grown
She’s got a Sunny smile She’s got a Sunny soul And always happy to help you know you’re not alone Her heart is hope And she’s hoping that you’ll hear her say You have friends You have friends in Maretime Bay
Princess Pipp, Zipp, Hitch and Senor Butterscotch Izzy, Minty, Misty-must be interesting to watch Even Misses Posey knows This is just a glowing soul Little pony full of hope like smoldering coals
You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us! Light a lantern of friendship today! Come visit us! Come visit us! Lift your hooves and let it fly away! Come visit us! Come visit us! You aren’t alone and I want to hear you say, “Come visit us! Come visit, visit, visit, visit…”
She’s got a Sunny smile She’s got a Sunny soul And always happy to help you know you’re not alone Her heart is hope And she’s hoping that you’ll hear her say You have friends You have friends in Maretime-
You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us! You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us! You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us! You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us!
You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us! You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us! You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us! You have friends in Maretime Bay Come visit us! Come visit us!Control the Crowd - My Little Pony FanmusicPit Crew2024-02-25 | I know, I know, I'm not super productive lately. A lot on my plate right now, but as I work my way through all the main mares, I was very excited to get to the music powerhouse that is Princess Pipp Petals. Only Misty now remains and I'll have collected all 10! Pipp is such a charming and adorable mare, and her positivity and personality always fills any scene she takes part in. This song actually originated as a much different version based off the official Pipp guided meditation for sleep, but all that really remains of that version are the opening lines. After totally failing to get the lyric video automated, I had So MuCh FuN rendering out and placing all 500 words into this video by hand. So much fun. So much. So, like, I hope it was worth it. Seriously, though, I did have a good time writing and working on this song. Thanks as always to Chompy and Snowy for rendering their thoughts as I fumbled through the mixing process.
Lyrics: Let me help you get to sleep Spread out your wings and breath deep Even when the dreams keep crawling Even when the breeze keeps calling Even even even when your feathers keep falling Weather keeps squalling Even keeled evening even when panicking everything’s calm Everypony stomp your feet See? Everything’s sweet Everypony find the time See? Everything is gonna be fine. Shine. Find your lifeline High time take to flight My my lookin’ Fine- I’ll be your waifu (Not the first time) So let’s draft another song Pull the stops and hop on Hip hop bops and drop bombs Pipp pop target stalked and locked on Tip top clip trot clips to clop on Princess hits with vids and pics So buy my merch and get subscriptions
Oh I might be a princess And I might play the part But know my confidence is Instrumental an indispensable heart And might be quite intense Since heavy is the mane that wears the crown And maybe little but I’m Still Pipp Petals I control the crowd Oh, oh, oh, oh I control the crowd Oh, oh oh, oh And never let you down
Everypony follow me P, I, Double P Pleased to be here Up on the beat Just skip through the intro Just like you’re meant to Walk your plot down to Mane Melody My team painting hooves And My team raising roofs. And Might seem crazy too But My dream, I mean, made it true. Got my face on my own perfume, and Everypony gapes when I hit the room Who’s that beautiful, tasteful, gracefu Bracelets, lace and bangles too? Slip the guards, and Hit the boulevard Tipsy getting carded Every single bar. I’m just so frickin smol They think that I’m a foal But everywhere I go The show knows I’m a star So Start That Beat Everypony Eyes On Me Supercharging All I See So welcome to my Melody
Oh I might be a princess And I might play the part But know my confidence is Instrumental an indispensable heart And might be quite intense Since heavy is the mane that wears the crown And maybe little but I’m Still Pipp Petals I control the crowd Oh, oh, oh, oh I control the crowd Oh, oh oh, oh And never let you down
No votes Unlikes Don’t choke Just try Get subs Cope Cry Flop Fail Then Fly
Oh I might be a princess And I might play the part But know my confidence is Instrumental an indispensable heart And might be quite intense Since heavy is the mane that wears the crown And maybe little but I’m Still Pipp Petals I control the crowd Oh, oh, oh, oh I control the crowd Oh, oh oh, oh And never let you down Oh, oh, oh, oh I control the crowd Oh, oh oh, oh And never let you downMiss 2018-mlp Secret Santa MusicPit Crew2024-01-16 | I waffled about posting this because I feel like someone is going to feel like I'm upset, and I'm not. But after running it by some friends, the consensus was that it should be out there somewhere. Anyway. https://files.catbox.moe/8u1l7x.wav
Lyrics: So I guess I kind of backed off the music this year, you know, doing the backend stuff, and last year really pushed me beyond my limits trying to do both. And I know it’s the same shit for everyone, I just, you know, hoped that maybe some new friend would write a few parodies or something. It’s been a big part of the season for me, so you know, sometimes I just have to sing how I feel.
Where the fuck is the music without me? High key wanted you to take me out back with the backbeat And oust me Do I really need to go round announcing I can’t do this shit anymore Every ounce of my ass it’s exhausting And my brand new life as a housekeeper Trad wife Santa pone my, I’m a crowd pleaser And I never find time like a broken metronome In the loudspeakers By the time I get home feel old and alone And a little bit cold and and my foot still hurts where the bone broke But it’s run, run, run On this old road And it’s go, go, go motherhecker No slowing down til the checker flag rolls Better Luck next time Drunk text my next lines Straight to my ex With a dick pic sex time Gosh damn that’s a weird flex Like Arnold Schwarzenegger in a sweater vest I can be your terminator in a turtleneck Treat these lyrics like a Kennedy, I murder text But remedy I couldn’t guess Prolly just me, full of vinegar and winter sweat Not a winner, just a little pest Best case scenario, I’m quitting when I finish this
Just guess that I miss 2018 Stories and songs going strong like the A-Team Don’t get me wrong you belong it’s a great thing Just wish I had time for the making
I’ll keep it short cause I don’t got the spare time Just to spin a tall tale for y’all in a mare rhyme Pull my hair out mane and tail too Hooves gnawed short cause I’m worried that I failed you Envelopes mailed tracking numbers in the inbox Stacking up like Maud pie piling the gem rocks Pony Sex wife beater, panties and the gym socks I’ll corrupt the youth til they got me sippin hemlock Fuck TikTok, skip Pipp’s ClipTrots You can call me Littlepip, pistol grip and flip stock I can empty whole clips I don’t need a trigger finger Or a middle finger, two hooves flipped off Chip on my shoulder cause I wanna hug the whole globe But I can’t through this damn computer so they won’t know Holy coke smoke maybe I’m a slowpoke Not a very clever pony, Chuckles, but it’s no joke Nope, nope, nope there’s too many broken folks Hurting in this fucking bitch I can’t keep my throat closed Singing in the shower with my sweater on, clothes soaked Breakfast just a soggy piece of waterlogged oat toast Face the day with the folks I love the most o- Ver compensating everytime I hope post Shake it like I’m derpy in a snow globe, go, go! Back on the beat, and I’m going til I croak yo
Just guess that I miss 2018 Stories and songs going strong like the A-Team Don’t get me wrong you belong it’s a great thing Just wish I had time for the making
I swear I’m not upset or anything. Really, I know everyone is busy. It just feels not quite the same without a whole bunch of songs coming out during the event about the OC bullshit and all. It’s part of the Season to me, and maybe that’s just because I did a whole bunch of them, who knows? I just needed to make something, you know, and you have to write what you feel if you want it to mean anything. Yeah so you should sing a song.The Man With A SmilePit Crew2024-01-02 | ...Hearths Warming Time(Live)Pit Crew2023-12-24 | Recorded live on 01/21/2023 at ANE in Boston. Originally written for Dustcar 12. I have so many happy memories of this song. From writing it, to recording it, to finally preforming it live.
Not far away in a town we all know A stallion walks slowly, his head hanging low There's purpose and drive in his eyes as he goes The wind in his mane and hooves caked in snow And there in the square of that quaint little town By the door of town hall is where he hunkers down He pulls his scarf tighter to fight off the cold Strums a guitar and carols alone
Happy Hearth's Warming, and if you find time Give thanks for your blessings, ahead and behind It isn't a chore or a bore, soon you'll see Most important of all are the smallest of things So please, everypony, I beg hear my cry, Happy Hearth's Warming all, after all, It's Hearth's Warming Time
There's not very much to the song that he sings It's simple and sadder it should rightfully be The world turns around him and nopony sees Past guitar, and scarf, and the things that they need Sweets and surprises are sold in the stalls And the stallion has nothing to sell them at all There's presents to wrap and there's garland to string Through the din of their thoughts they scarce hear him sing
The streetlights come on and the ornaments glow Ponies head home to escape from the cold Hearth's Warming came and joy did abound To all that did dwell in that quaint little town But then so much later, the following year There was somehow in town just a little less cheer No one could place it, but something was gone A stallion, a scarf, a guitar and a song
His absence not noticed, but still to this day What exactly is missing, nopony can say And there by the door of the sprawling town hall Past wagons and streetlights and vendors and stalls The wind blows the snow while nopony sings Perhaps what is missing is the smallest of things I'm sure were he there he would say full of cheer Take stock of the things that you truly hold dear
Happy Hearth's Warming, and if you find the time Give thanks for your blessings, ahead and behind It isn't a chore or a bore, soon you'll see Most important of all are the smallest of things So please, everypony, I beg hear my cry, Happy Hearth's Warming all, after all, It's Hearth's Warming TimeMy Roommate is a Vampire - My Little Pony Fanmusic Featuring GobiraptorPit Crew2023-10-30 | If you don't already know it, this Spooktober song is based on the absolutely classic Octascratch slashfic by the same name, which you can find here: fimfiction.net/story/36388/my-roommate-is-a-vampire Definitely a good golden age fanfic and worth your time for the nostalgia if nothing else.
Many thanks to Gobiraptor, a for real life tea-and-crumpets-person for bringing her wonderful voice to Octavia. Catch more of her endeavors at: twitter.com/Gobiraptor https://bsky.app/profile/gobiraptor.bsky.social
Big thanks to ArwenCuack for the artwork (done months ago, lol, this song has languished in a folder for a long time waiting for Halloween to come around. It was actually done for a Busty's back in like April or something.) Find her art and comms at: twitter.com/ArwenCuack/status/1682091059340255241 ko-fi.com/arwencuack/commissions
A monster attack? Blast!
How am I meant to practice with a monster?
Two room loft in Canterlot Split the rent with a loud, obnoxious Hot and gorgeous (What am I saying?) Rude and boisterous, And a slob. And her pants are off, And her rooms a mess! To be fair, in her defence, She does the does the dishes, and the cups She cleans them…with wubs. Wakes up in the dead of night, With her eyes all red and her coat is white Dark, nocturnal That infernal creature Has me drooling- wait I didn’t mean that…did I? And I’m staying up til midnight Just to spend the time with Scratch; There’s a catch. Bloodbag in the icebox, Then our eyes locked, And to my shock, The fangs came out and When they sank down It was time to flip the lights off. Teeth in my jugular In the struggle blood Pours and so do words I’m in love with her And it sounds absurd But those aren’t the eyes Of a murderer Final kiss, final breath, final instant But I guess that I broke through her instinct So warm with her chest on my chest Now I’ll lay me down to rest But the death that lies Behind those crimson eyes Dies and I Might survive to see the daylight
She’s a motherbuckin’ bloodsucker Got the fans starstruck Eyes red, undead creature of the night With the too wide smile and the eyes like fire Don’t deny it, Vinyl My roommate is a vampire
Better be careful Or you’ll end up a werewolf It’s a miracle That I’m here at all Cause my roommate mare Is nuttier than a pair of balls Can’t bear to fall. And I swear to all The princesses In Canterlot I should be scared, But the truth is dear, I’m too damn queer to be Scared at all. No fear! That’s the spirit Cello’s out, and it’s time to hear it Drop the bass while I wash the taste Of rabbit clear. Cheers! Oh dear it Seems the fifth of gin and tonics gone And so’s my phonics, darn, Not even dawn so, Vinyl, darling Grab another bottle; pop! Let’s get lush, Let’s get lit, Let’s unlive a little bit. Might be undead but (Please excuse the language) I don’t give a shit. Whiskey down the hatch- Next! Tipsy have to laugh- Just! Call this track a smash- Hit! Half liquor and half- Sex! Like Katy Perry’s cherry chapstick I’m addicted to this halfwit Brash, erratic, captivated and Snap a photo she has “Ze Magics” Ghoulish grin with a girlish soul, Break and enter and break the rules, So damn loud and so damn cool, No wonder I’ve been filly-fooled
She’s a motherbuckin’ bloodsucker Got the fans starstruck Eyes red, undead creature of the night With the too wide smile and the eyes like fire Don’t deny it, Vinyl My roommate is a vampire
Know damn well she’s dangerous. But are those fangs, or just The way she grins? Delicious, Lackadaisical and languorous Intimate, Physically indecent Every day is an incident I’m the tinder, and she’s the flint And our kindred spirit lit this bitch, Like gelignite in a rubbish bin And the bomb goes off when the bass drops in Vicious sinner, sinister and Anything but innocent Inner Circle, hitter, fixer Big intimidator, bitch Slugger, thug, enforcer horse. And holy shit I’m into it.
She’s a motherbuckin’ bloodsucker Got the fans starstruck Eyes red, undead creature of the night With the too wide smile and the eyes like fire Don’t deny it, Vinyl My roommate is a vampire She’s a bloodsucker Got the fans starstruck Eyes red, undead creature of the night With the too wide smile and the eyes like fire Don’t deny it, Vinyl My roommate is a vampire.Moonbow - My Little Pony Izzy FanmusicPit Crew2023-10-25 | Someimes you just want to make a song about Izzy Moonbow, y'know?
Available for download here: https://files.catbox.moe/luftmw.wav
You can call me Trash god Twilight Sparkle but I’m half off Laugh at me now but I’m gonna leave ‘em Slack jawed keep believing Ima blast off Faster than a whip crack, batty as a crackpot Master of the knickknacks, chatty as chatbot Tripping every trap when my ass walk Grasp straws Every challenge is a path trod And the paths long Thank Scott I got the brass balls Best friend Sunny that’s my bffs Funny how it feels to have her stunning Smile brilliant and burning Eyes to light me up and optimism Foil to my autism Long as I’m along with em Stronger than a Kong “hit em”
Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. You can call me. Izzy. Izzy. Moonbow.
Kick the frickin rhythm get em Grinnin spittin spinnin Dizzy like I’m sippin venom Sniffin Sunny smells like cinnamon And I’m a gremlin I’m a goblin. I’m your Robin Hood your Dalai Lama I’m the sparkle in your fuckin aura I’m the harlot, I’m the carnal pleasure I’m the starlet, im the supernova in the darkness And this is how a unicorn spits spits Slick victorious and vicious Glitter lesbians with the lipstick Hit this you can call me fickle but my friendships Solid as a brick fist Mystic. Back in Bridlewood and I’m a misfit. Sprout got me on a hit list. Bitch!
Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. You can call me. Izzy. Izzy. Moonbow.
Moon. Bow. Goon. So. Me n my crew glow. True gold. Music in the room grows Whosoever choose so You can do it to Gonna bloom you’re a new rose Screw it Ima do it too What a loophole Up high, too slow I’m the dynamite and And my fuse low Tick, tick tick Boom! How the fuck did you think This concludes yo?? True chaotic in a world Of true neutral And I’ll only ever snooze After- afternoon goes If you ever need a blue Mane unicorn the tune goes Sea pony shoo bee doo yo
Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. Moon bow. Moon bow. You can call me. You can call me. Izzy. Izzy. Moonbow.Potion Shop - Silly Pony Rap featuring ChompyPit Crew2023-10-07 | Remember, winners don't do drugs, they do ponies.
Written for Busty's 44: Drugs, and I mean, I think it came out decent for a square who has never illegally drugged. Big thanks to Chompy for always being down to throw a bro a hoof.
Hello! Welcome to Pony Potions, where every potion is perfect and every is an experience! What can I get for you today?
Uh, I dunno…what do you got?
Well… I go the uppers and downers And pcp by the gallon I got a fun futa potion To turn a mare to a stallion And psychedelics, a hill of them, also codeine and Valium An got that sodium chlorine* in powdered form for your salad I’ve got elixirs and mixers and liquor Pictures of Nyx and her sister Kissing so dicks’ll get thicker Strippers and stickers and glitter Damn I got everything You a fan of amphetamines I got meth I got methadone I got kettles of ketamine pack of pegasus feathers To get you higher than ever And leave you looking at rainbows Like you were walkin on weather But it get better and better I got the salt and the pepper You got the bread and the cheddar You want it I can go get her “You got the sparkles and glitter glue?” Motherbucker in red and blue Purple, orange and burgundy Do you know who you’re talking to? Unforgettable edibles They be silly and funny I got em special from Pinkie Pie So they lookin like gummy Got the morphine it’s medical Robitussin, incredible My concoctions and chemicals Too advanced to be ethical Like I said I’m the potion shop And I’m sellin overstock I’m as dope as my dope yo an holy Smokes we don’t ever “STOP!”
Kick the door down Hit the floor now Bitch we going to the potion shop Get the horse This what we lookin for Flip the scoreboard til we grope the top Blow a line that Buckin blows your mind And gulpin coke and lime While jokin smokin pot Know it’s time For goin spoken rhymes So take a toke and dime And throw a bro a scotch
Hey that’s pretty good, but hey, I’m looking for something a little special. Is that all you got?
Is that all I got? Maaaan…
I got the coke in the back, You want a key I got stacks I got the heroin “Black?” Don’t even narrow it down About a billion pills like I’m Fillin millionaire deals Even Sacklers can lack words About the dope that I shill I got your ecstasy next to me No flex just the best pony Sex and fetish for medi-scene Checks in the melody Call it a felony fella sellin This hella cream Sweet as sugary saccharine Laughing snacking on gelatine And I fill em with jealousy But they never be jailin me Spittin words like a spelling bee While I’m selling my jelly beans Oxy, boxes and buckets and barrels Carry em Buck it and bare em Poppers I suck em and share em Barely enough for my harem horn of a unicorn Eye of newt and thistle thorn Got my recipe coded Like it’s written in cuneiform And my uniform vest Has got a plate in the chest Because the haters attempt To put a blade in my breast Got the sunshine and celery stalks Clover and berries in stock Clever economy stocks End up in pillory stocks Homophone, homonym Thank the moon, not a hominid I’m a goon of a pony With all the juices a lot of them
“Time”
Pick up the items you took Scribble the price in the book Eyes on the prizes and vices I got these fish on the “HOOK!”
Kick the door down Hit the floor now Bitch we going to the potion shop Get the horse This what we lookin for Flip the scoreboard til we grope the top Blow a line that Buckin blows your mind And gulpin coke and lime While jokin smokin pot Know it’s time For goin spoken rhymes So take a toke and dime And throw a bro a scotch
“So…uh yeah I guess give me some glitter…some alicorn sparkles and like an 8 ball of coke?”
*I know it's chloride. This sounded better.Back in the Saddle - A Song by ChompyPit Crew2023-09-27 | It's hard to be back when you don't even remember leaving. Many thanks to Chuckles editing the video. I could never have done it without you. And thank you for the amazing background artwork! See the link below!
Lyrics: Now I'm back in the saddle and I say okay Cause I worked all night and I slept all day But I'm back in the saddle, I'll get tossed no way Let's give this sucker just one more play So get back in your saddle so what do you say Hey, go out and win this day
A win is a win by an inch or a yard And winnin' don't come just by tryin' hard Take your lumps and your bumps, And your bruises and cuts Blue ribbons don't come just by hanging tough The ones who finally win, I'm sure you'll find Were the ones kept working past the finish line But when the lights go out and your vision gets clearer Can you even stand to look in the mirror?
So I'm back in the saddle and I'm ready to ride Been sittin' too long and I say it's high time Once your back in your saddle with your friends at your side You pull yourself up and continue the climb Now your back in the saddle and I'm sure you'll find The only thing I'm thinkin' bout is crossing that line
I'm preaching to the choir, but I hope that I inspire Just a little bit of confidence in things that have transpired That time you thought you fractured, well honestly and factually Was shining testament to your amazing personality Because when you reflect with optimism, retrospect The things that broke you down were things you couldn't do without So it's time to dust it off, take the L, walk it off Cause partner there's a worse thing than an isolated loss
So I'm back in the saddle and I don't care when Cause I know I ain't stopping till I reach the end Yes I'm back in the saddle you can bet my friend I got sweat to spill and I got fences to mend Oh I'm back in the saddle and I intend To make the best of of the time I spend
Now spiritually and logically you're not quite where you want to be But getting there ain't getting closer sitting melancholy The world will keep on turnin' Weather idling or burnin' So you might as well keep swinging till you hear the bell a ringin' I know that you can do this, buckle down and get on to it Only one mistake you'll make is if you stop on working through it 'Cause courage is defined by those who fall and keep on rising So friend we got a road ahead; I say it's winning time
So we're back in the saddle keep your eyes on the prize You're better than the rest ain't no compromise Yeah we're back in the saddle high time to realize No time to look down, when your soaring through the skies Yes you're back in the saddle got fire in your eyes You been down in your lows, keep your head held high
Thanks to floralshitpost for the chilled-out background art.Find more of her art here! (NSFW): twitter.com/floralsh_tpostCherry Berrys Balloon - MLP FanmusicPit Crew2023-09-18 | A song for a nice pink aviatrix. Big thank you to Snowy for giving me a good critique of an early draft to improve the mix. I always feel like I learn something new from you, friend.
She’s Looking down at top mares From her basket in the atmosphere Tryna find what’s out there Catch the magic breeze and let it steer Every doubt she’s fighting Lies beneath the clouds she’s riding Up above the cirrus hiding Higher than her fear The sun and moon are glowing Almost close enough for her to touch And that ol' wind keeps blowing Hear the bora bellow, zephyr rush The world’s within her clutch And even when the wind is rough When all her problems lie below The only road that’s left to go is up
Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon An escape to the great bright blue in Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon What a view, when you’re higher than the moon Fire up the furnace Lightin’ up the burners Off on an adventure And promise she’ll return its Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon
Floating in an ocean Made of golden sun and silver clouds Rolling with the motion Of the slowly flowing nimbus round And the tolling thunder, Isn’t scary when it’s under Wanderlust like hunger just, Accumulates in cumulus, And Peering down at pegasi Beyond a care beyond the sky She longs to see what she can find Beyond the deep horizon line And every sunbeam dancing Beauty’s truly dream enhancing Shooting through this bird's eye view Inside the blue is so entrancing
Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon An escape to the great bright blue in Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon What a view, when you’re higher than the moon So fire up the furnace Lightin’ up the burners Off on an adventure And promise she’ll return its Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon
The fire Burns inside her Bids her fly and Lifts her higher
Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon An escape to the great bright blue in Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon What a view, when you’re higher than the moon Fire up the furnace She’s lightin’ up the burners She’s off on an adventure And promise she’ll return its Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s Balloon Cherry Berry’s BalloonSunshine and Rainbows- Fallout: Equestria FansongPit Crew2023-09-06 | So this was actually written in like...2020. Maybe even 2019. Way back in the back in the day, just never got around to moving on it. Thank you so much, as so often the case, to Chompy for putting in the hard work and getting actual music to sing along to. Chompy, you are an amazing friend and a fantastic everycreature. Thanks for always being good. And to ArwenCuack for the lovely art, which you can see unedited here: twitter.com/ArwenCuack/status/1699521454251851993. Find more of her here: twitter.com/ArwenCuack trello.com/b/9sKli91X/arwencuacks-commissions
Welcome to the world It’s dark and gray and feels like everyday there’s Rain in the air and clouds are blocking out the sun But I don’t care; if you’ll be there to Set my world on fire Somepony told me “Girl you’ve got to love someone”
And you’ll have Sunshine and rainbows, these ol’ clouds won’t last forever Sunshine and rainbows down every road we walk together We’ll have Sunshine and rainbows; we’re like two birds of a feather You and I And we’re gonna fly We’re gonna fly Ooo-ooo-ooo, Sunshine and Rainbows We’ll have Ooo-ooo-ooo, Sunshine and Rainbows We’ll have Ooo-ooo-ooo, Sunshine and Rainbows You and I You and I
I’m looking for the stars at night But all I seem to find is thunder It makes me wonder why I even want to try But then you touch my hoof And all the world falls out from under And you keep telling me to fight that, fight that, fight that good fight.
Cause when the world is at its darkest place We need a hero We need a hero who will bring us back the light And we’ll have Sunshine and rainbows, these ol’ clouds won’t last forever Sunshine and rainbows down e-ve-ry road we walk together We’ll have Sunshine and rainbows, and we’ll fix this broken weather you and I We’ll clear the sky We’ll clear it. Sunshine and rainbows, these ol’ clouds won’t last forever Sunshine and rainbows down every road we walk together We’ll have Sunshine and rainbows, we’re like two birds of a feather, you and I And we’re gonna fly.
We’re gonna fly.Rarity Investigates - MLP FanmusicPit Crew2023-08-20 | Oh boy! It only took a month to figure this out, and I just about bricked my poor lappy on an install, on account of how I'm not very clever with computers, but here it is! A song with pony voices!
Synthesizers used were so-vits 4.0 and Controllable Talknet.
Swag cap on with the trench coat, darling Brass shoes if the perp starts brawling Flask in the breast pocket Next to the tech call it Cap shooter yes cock it Best get talking Sex sells so I fell for another broad When she walked in the door like “Oh sod.” Here comes another one, Back on the case Pretty face With a loaded gun Don’t call me Zipp though I’m dippin Zip codes Street after street Make it quick or it gets cold Dive bar and strip club Eyeballing victims You got a hot lead? Might get your dick rubbed I’m the Dick with the balls of steel All mare with a flare for dramatic reveals Mind like a hacksaw Leave ‘em all slack jawed When I’m on the track now Villains better back off
Hip flask with the sash and cape When rarity investigates Tipped hat and the fashion’s great When rarity investigates
PI with the keen eye And the sleek shine of my Chic line Hit the streets I Get the beat line And when I squeeze my Wolverine peeps die Never try to lie to me, fool Seeing right through You’re eye to eye With a mind like a Knife too Life’s black and white But my eyes stay ice blue Gumshoe stuck to The right case like glue Chase clues Take dues Get laid while the Bass grooves Get fame Kiss dames Burn change Like a cigarette flame Punch thugs and I Duck from slugs Wake up, take drugs Stay drunk, lay bugs Make love, make discoveries I uncover these While I recover up Under the covers please
Hip flask with the sash and cape When rarity investigates Tipped hat and the fashion’s great When rarity investigates
Rarity investigates You better bet your fates I’ll never rest the case until I check and mate I’m a deck of aces and I’m dedicated My careers like my clothes Highly decorated Ray bans in the middle of the night Better make plans cause a kiddo wanna fight They lay hands but I lay hooves And I might take a bruise but I Break you Take two Gonna smooth talk a stallion That a gun in your pocket or a whole Damn battalion? And what a gal gotta do Round here for a clue Pretty boy, wanna smooch? Yeah I know that you do Now I’m back on the road in the back end street Wrap it up in a bow like it’s fashion week Snappy quote and I’m back to the last boutique Rainbow Dash doesn’t know what she has in me
Hip flask with the sash and cape When rarity investigates Tipped hat and the fashion’s great When rarity investigates Hip flask with the sash and cape When rarity investigates Tipped hat and the fashion’s great When rarity investigatesSh*tposts, Hand Grenades, and Horseshoes - MLP Music [Explicit Lyrics]Pit Crew2023-07-14 | I, uh, I might have gone a little far on this one. But the topic prompt was "The Internet is Scary" so....
The internet is scary? What kind of a topic is that? The internet isn’t scary. The real world is scary. The internet is where the ponies are.
So plug the fuckin modem in, And load ‘em in Like bullets in my Colt again. Hold onto your scrotum; Hit the road and let the show begin. Roll it like it’s Roller Coaster Tycoon, Crying, “I don’t want to go on Mr Bones Wild Ride!” Go again. Pull the lever down; People please the crowd. We can have another go around; Princess Pinkie Pie can keep the crown. I can keep the kilogram of semen; You can keep it down; Very hard to jack it while you’re laughing, Jeezy freaking wow! Can’t a pervert even jerk in peace now? Creep around and deep into your DMs, Sneak into your webcam? Peepin’ out the lenses while your sleeping With my peepee out? Got my Rainbow Dashie mason jar and I drink it down. In my stinky, musty Basement with my minky plushy Ponka Po with Pinkie pussy; Teeny tiny weenie bustin’ Isn’t even interestin’ Thinking, “He’s just so disgusting,” Talking to my daki while I’m boppin’ Call it my dis-cushion.
Hoppin’ on the intertubes just to make a shitpost. Hand grenades and horseshoes, so I ain’t gotta get close. Cloppin’ to a two dimension bitch and switch hoes. Sparky Sparkeroni plus your waifu is a spitroast. You might say I’m knuckle dragging; I know I’m a tip toe. Tipping topping everything; well you know how that this goes. I’ma scribble this prose; T pose in drip clothes; Booping every snootle; bitches say that Nonny gets nose.
Mission after mission On the internet, call it my E-mission Bet that it be kissin’ mares and making Erry single pony wet, And every single person on the board Just a little more annoyed Than they were before I Called their wife a silly whore. Ordinary morning on the forum, It’s a war zone: Ayylmaoes and dougshit Interspersed with pornos. Gee Percenters thirsty for the Spider legs and dog thots. Season one purists On a soapbox selling hog wash. I can start a fist fight right now, here and now, Just by posting Trixie and a trans flag. Gay pow’! But with great pow’ comes a great responsibility This ability to incite a hate crowd. I ain’t even gotta believe the shit I’m posting To leave the bitches choking on my Creamy, memey weeby weenie. Maybe I’m just coping, just to cover up The openness. If I make enough jokes No one knows what’s serious. Seriously friends I’m just dumb as fuck and depressed. Roflcopter. I’m just joshing; don’t believe what he says. Mommy says I’m very clever, she thinks I’m a genius. I don’t think she knows what a year of whiskey drinks did.
Hoppin’ on the intertubes just to make a shitpost. Hand grenades and horseshoes, so I ain’t gotta get close. Cloppin’ to a juicy two dimension bitch and switch hoes. Sparky Sparkeroni plus your waifu is a spitroast. You might say I’m knuckle dragging; I know I’m a tip toe. Tipping topping everything; well you know how that this goes. I’ma scribble this prose; T pose in drip clothes; Booping every snootle; bitches say that Nonny gets nose.
So dial up the broadband, Gosh damn, Logging on to cock spam. Adblockin’ bots, while I’m rubbing on my sock hand. Watch me while I dodge bans, Running from the cops, and Long as I’m anonymous I’ma fuckin’ bomb vans. Kickin’ on the Crocs Sweatpants and the top hat. Damn looking hot: flat butt, And I got fat. Walk that line, and I dunno When to stop that. Typing while I’m fighting, gloved up Like I’m Strong Bad.
Hoppin’ on the intertubes just to make a shitpost. Hand grenades and horseshoes, so I ain’t gotta get close. Cloppin’ to a juicy two dimension bitch and switch hoes. Sparky Sparkeroni plus your waifu is a spitroast. You might say I’m knuckle dragging; I know I’m a tip toe. Tipping topping everything; well you know how that this goes. I’ma scribble this prose; T pose in drip clothes; Booping every snootle; bitches say that Nonny gets nose.
Hoppin’ on the intertubes just to make a shitpost. Hand grenades and horseshoes, so I ain’t gotta get close. Cloppin’ to a juicy two dimension bitch and switch hoes. Sparky Sparkeroni plus your waifu is a spitroast. You might say I’m knuckle dragging; I know I’m a tip toe. Tipping topping everything; well you know how that this goes. I’ma scribble this prose; T pose in drip clothes; Booping every snootle; bitches say that Nonny gets nose.Welcome to the Magic - My Little Pony FanmusicPit Crew2023-07-03 | A silly song because I felt like writing a silly song. At some point soon I will do something uplifting and positive and sappy again, but I'm having a silly week, so not for this one or the next song. Thanks to Snowy for "Yeah?"
Welcome to the magic! Welcome to the madness! Welcome to the slapstick! Welcome to the, to the, to the Welcome to the magic! Welcome to the madness! Welcome to the slapstick! Welcome to the magic!
The friendship lessons: believe ‘em. This positivity: mean it. When I speak I’m so unironic The doctor says I’m anaemic, And it’s not a meme it’s iconic. I keep the smile it’s chronic , And I’m just the cream of crop If you’re farming introvert autists. But I won’t say that I’m sorry That I’m rolling harder than Sonic; I might not roll a Ferrari, But I got a horse on the bonnet. And you’re like, “Damn, feeling nauseous” Cause I’m just more than you can stomach. A dominatrix; this fandom Can’t stand the randomness, nonsense. Honest Applejack. And I’m on it like apple crack; Stepping up and I’ll Apple smack You out the saddle. Slap! Throw hands, throw hooves, I throw noobs off the roof, but Me and my crew will fight you With kindness. Send a nice gift to spite you. Chill like ice cubes. A Clydesdale, and you’re minute. Screaming, “Bite me!” while I bite you, Then throw a party for you and invite you. Blow the mic out like fellatio; Dunno what “ratio” means. I’m too lame and old; Before they made radios Recorded my spits in old Roman: made in stone. Back when we bought shirts and shopped mech Paid in gold. Back when Pangea was a preteen and awkward, And I’m so damn Derped that I’m shipped with the Doctor. Doc! Doc! I’m hurt! The proctologist! stop her! Hoof up my bum while she’s dropping my boxers Down to my Converse. Damn this a long verse. Wrap that shit up, ‘cause I’m strapped for the strong words. Drop the hook! Quick! For I fuck up the song worse Than Ponka Po filling the crosswords with Clop words.
Welcome to the magic! Welcome to the madness! Welcome to the slapstick! Welcome to the, to the, to the Welcome to the magic! Welcome to the madness! Welcome to the slapstick! Welcome to the magic!
Headed back to the internet, Even though there’s no interest In my negative intellect Messages about intersex Futa horses that intersects With my fetish for spinnerets, Spider ponies with cigarettes, Keeping me in a minaret. Locked up like Rapunzel; In the dungeon, with my bum full Of horsecock. So damn hot; It’s wonderful! No homo though! I’m just cum fueled I’m too pudge, dumb, and ugly to run; I’m just gasping on mares by the lungful, Stagger and stumble, Asthmatically wheezing so That Dash says I’m uncool. Comma, conjunction. No transition to the next patter. No one cares; no one listens, So it don’t matter, Long as this shit keeps spinnin. Spittin nonsense ‘bout the mares that I’m kissin’ While I’m sitting in a chair wishin’ I was there. Listen I’m aware that I’m fishin’ For somepony to care; I frickin’ swear to Celestia, I’m just mad for Equestria, Only difference with the rest of ya: When I’m stressed I can rest my nuts On a hydraulic press, press to bust Then flex, and I wreck machines Like I’m flecks of rust, And When I thrust between Then the rest adjust. Get set, bust! I might not know what I’m doing, But I’m having fun while I do it, N’ treatin Grubber’s dick like my career. What I mean I blew it. Gluing horseshoes To my flip flops, And skip, hop right off a cliff Like I’ve been taught. It’s been hot, friends, Now the end. Heres the sendoff: Hey Snow? (Yeah?) Spin that frickin’ disc Like it’s hip hop!
Welcome to the magic! Welcome to the madness! Welcome to the slapstick! Welcome to the, to the, to the Welcome to the magic! Welcome to the madness! Welcome to the slapstick! Welcome to the ma-! Welcome to the magic! Welcome to the madness! Welcome to the slapstick! Welcome to the, to the, to the Welcome to the magic! Welcome to the madness! Welcome to the slapstick! Welcome to the magic!Coco Pommel - Saucy MLP FanmusicPit Crew2023-06-11 | A silly song, for a silly meme, for a sweet mare.
Oh sweet Manehattan; it’s the city that never sleeps There’s always something happening in your busy streets The roar of a million voices, the score of a million feet The stories of choices we make to share generosity And in the workshop she sits there Sweet cream and aquamarine hair Unseen, unfair ‘Cause I need this mare More than I need to Eat, sleep and breathe air There’s a sunset waiting for us past the cold concrete And there’s a romance being written on these swarming streets My heartbeat resonates like music in the steel and glass She puts her hoof in mine Looks deep into my eyes And says “Put it in my ass,”
Oh, Coco Pommel She sweeps me right off my feet, What a treat, she’s like a sweet vanilla Angel Oh, Coco Pommel I’m in love, She’s a cream coloured dove from above And she likes doing butt stuff.
Oh she likes doing butt stuff.
We went walking down the Canterlot Boulevard Our hooves were trottin, yeah, and she would clip and I would clop Trading stories ‘bout her life and family and job I learned that she was perfect She learned that I’m slob But she saw past my broken history Leaned in close And sweetly kissed my cheek Tickly whiskers while she’s whispering “Hey there sweetie, What a lovely evening Got that loving feeling Maybe we can go Back home And do it in the butt”
Oh, Coco Pommel She sweeps me right off my feet, What a treat, she’s like a sweet vanilla Angel Oh, Coco Pommel I’m in love, She’s a cream coloured dove from above And she likes doing butt stuff.
My dear Dandere darling The white dove to my starling And each design she’s drawing Has me falling and falling and falling for
Oh, Coco Pommel She sweeps me right off my feet, What a treat, she’s like a sweet vanilla Angel Oh, Coco Pommel I’m in love, She’s a cream coloured dove from above And she likes doing butt stuff.
She likes doing butt stuff.
Coco Pommel.Dont Kill the Part of You Thats Cringe - My Little Pony MusicPit Crew2023-05-15 | As you might have guessed by now, there are few things I like more than an outrageously overdone Original Character (do not steal). Maybe it's because I grew up solidly in the midst of vintage cringe culture. Maybe I just get a good laugh out of them. Maybe it's because it hits me right in the heart when someone goes all in on a character with no regard for the "right" way to do things, but as part of my ongoing process to make cringecore a thing, have a song. I'm sure it won't be the last.
She's currently building up a commission portfolio, so I really ought to be giving her commissions that, you know, make her look good. Instead she still puts up with my dumb ass asking to prominently feature her making a really terrible cringe pony. We even had a really nice conversation where I sent over a sketch and talked through like..."ok, she's pretty obnoxious, but what can we do to make her WORSE?" And honestly I'm just delighted with the outcome. This girl is so loud, so colorful, a fairy alicorn princess with the fishnets and the stripey socks and the hypersaturated body marking and I just love her. She's adorable.
Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe Kill the part of you that gives even one fucking shit Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe Colour scheme, hot pink, lime, green, and orange Show that shit to all your friends And never listen to the cynicism, embrace the optimism And all that matters in the end Is that you had fun So if you had some Love the part of you that is cringe
So let me tell you ‘bout my sweet self insert She’s pink and all her friends are real pleased with her Inside her brain the season’s always winter And she tries to smile when her inside’s been hurt A little ditzy And she can’t remember heck all Not very clever But hey, that’s what makes her special She cares no matter who the folks might be Yeah, what I really like about her Is she’s kinda like me
Pink coat, and blonde mane She wears a Santa hat in sun and snow or rain She isn’t lewd but you all assume it anyway HoHoHo-ok
Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe Kill the part of you that gives even one fucking shit Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe Colour scheme, hot pink, lime, green, and orange Show that shit to all your friends And never listen to the cynicism, embrace the optimism And all that matters in the end Is that you had fun So if you had some Love the part of you that is cringe
So let me tell you ‘bout my sweet self insert She isn’t sleepy and her knee’s not injured She isn’t broken in a dozen places And every morning she can always face it Extroverted and she knows what to say Her feet don’t hurt and her mane isn’t turning gray She’s never angry, yeah my OC, What I really like about her Is she isn’t like me
She’s sweet. And she’s sane. She doesn’t struggle with her eating or a broken brain. And when I’m mad I stop and ask “Well what would Chuckles say?” HoHoHo-ok
Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe Kill the part of you that gives even one fucking shit Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe Colour scheme, hot pink, lime, green, and orange Show that shit to all your friends And never listen to the cynicism, embrace the optimism And all that matters in the end Is that you had fun So if you had some Love the part of you that is cringe
So make that Mary Sue Make your waifu marry you Why should you care If the hope can help to carry you? The world’s too scary to be Worried ‘bout their point of view. And cringe is very, very (you).
So come on tell me ‘bout your cool self insert Spill that spaghetti. Ready? Go full cringelord Don’t be afraid of looking weird You’re already fookin here’ And you’re beautiful, so fear no censure I hope they’re married to your favourite pony! And when you think about it you’re not lonely, Come on and post that pretty art you drew Yeah, what I really like about them Is what I like about you
Cute snoot and pretty eyes They make me chuckle, heckin holy heck I love you guys And when you smile then I get to smile too, my friend So post that fuckin cringe
Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe Kill the part of you that gives even one fucking shit Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe Color scheme, hot pink, lime, green, and orange Show that shit to all your friends And never listen to the cynicism, embrace the optimism And all that matters in the end Is that you had fun So if you had some Love the part of you that is cringeEvening With Twilight - Peaceful MLP FanmusicPit Crew2023-05-02 | Just a little quiet side project. I have a few songs right now giving me some trouble in production and wanted to do something straightforward and in my comfort zone to feel like I was still making progress.
Up inside of Golden Oak After twilight By the fireside Books on the right To left baby spike lies Quiet So tired, but her eyes shine Violet It’s Twi-time Silent as the night sky Silver moon hanging bright High Bats flying by, shy wing flicker flitter flutter To the shimmer, glitter glamour of the Fireflies Hooves on the ottoman Books: got one, got two, got a lotta them Cardigan blue, warm wool and mug of hot brew Fill the tea pot new gotta start again She’s so smart, call her Solomon; cute too Maybe too cute, brute force brain with a screw loose Drifting off to sleep, sweet dreams, in a book snooze Owlowicious says she’s the who’s who of who’s who
In the stillness of the reading nook Shadows in leaves of the branches and the books Both rustle in the breeze blowing gentle after midnight And I want to spend the evening with Twilight There’s no story to these lyrics Sorry if you came to get a giggle but my spirit Isn’t feeling brilliant or boisterous and until it’s right I just want to paint a quiet picture here with Twilight
Flip, turn the page Candle wick wiggles It holds the flame Bee wax dribbles Dripping like a golden honeydrop Slowly rolling down the taper only stops With the morning clock Flip, turn again Midnight slips, slips, slips into another day Tick, tock, tick “Quick, quick, quick” the seconds say Every minute spent is blessing and I want to stay Till I slip away Blue mane, two stripes, hooves like lavender and Cute bright pupils in her peepers and they Sparkle in the moonlight Got no clue how she manages Hooves on my heart wounds soothe like bandages Two AM comes and Two AM vanishes She’s so beautiful I could fill a million canvases Sandman banished we can sleep when fire dies Flip another page in the library with Twilight
In the stillness of the reading nook Shadows in leaves of the branches and the books Both rustle in the breeze blowing gentle after midnight And I want to spend the evening with Twilight There’s no story to these lyrics Sorry if you came to get a giggle but my spirit Isn’t feeling brilliant or boisterous and until it’s right I just want to paint a quiet picture here with TwilightAnimal - MLP Fanmusic [Explicit Lyrics]Pit Crew2023-04-23 | My favorite part is the wolfgirl awoo in the second chorus. It delights me still.
Many thanks to Chompy for hopping on the chorus to push it down an extra few semitones. I had to get up and record using my morning voice just to get the prechorus down to the fifth, but getting that extra octave is just outside of my range. An EXTRA saucy song for Busty's "Acting Like Animals" theme, with many thanks to floralshitpost for the art to go with it. (Which, for the record, was on commission BEFORE this youtu.be/zPtMglIaroE came out. We're just having a hivemind moment here.) Find more of her art here! (NSFW): twitter.com/floralsh_tpost
Whoa there Fluttershy! Whoa there! No reason to be like that. We can talk this through. Easy there, girl; easy there. Whoa-whoa-whoa-back-back-back-back! (You’re going to LOVE ME!)
Wahaha it’s a mare in heat Coming at me Rarity Head to my feet going weak at the knees She gonna pounce and I’m scared to be here Please be gentle carefully dear Animalistic can’t even see clear Cannibal vision she gonna eat that meat Like jeezy petes she’s freaky And she’s goin creature mode Say the heat makes her explode Begging please can I have your foal Fluttershy bitch I told you no Scratch that itch with a shaft and tip She goin down like “how’s the trip” G and PT disappeared my D And like “how’s that for a magic trick?” Twilight hump with a rule and compass Running that bum like calculus Just when she finish Pinkie’s twitchin Shit well here we go again
I’m gonna hit that estrus ass Dick as big as a Texas hat And when I flex my checks and cash I get a bitch like best in class Mare in the Lexus wreck and crash Ain’t no sweat gotta Estus flask You got the breastes? I gotta pass I wanna come in Rainbow Dash
Animal, animal Want that Animal, animal Want that Animal, animal Want that Animal, animal
So fulla heat like a mare in estrus She tryna flirt it’s goddamn precious Go get her friend for a threesome See son, callin’ that trips, so y’all better check this Like spike on a checklist, reckless Pipp just texted sex pics; heck this High tech, it’s my ticket Straight to the moon when I fuck a princess Queen Haven please believe me I was behaving she tryna freak me See these likes on her clip trot page And her blogspot say I got dick for days Zipp’s the same, even Hitch can say Izzy told him it was just a phase Back in the day with Apple J We used to go for a roll in the (heeeyy!) They hate me. Cause they ain’t me. They gatekeep. Cause they can’t keep Up, and I can’t sleep, cause I’m eight deep In Pank call it hanky panky
I’m gonna hit that estrus ass Dick as big as a Texas hat And when I flex my checks and cash I get a bitch like best in class Mare in the Lexus wreck and crash Ain’t no sweat gotta Estus flask You got the breastes? I gotta pass I wanna come in Rainbow Dash
Animal, animal Want that Animal, animal Want that Animal, animal Want that Animal, animal
The birds and the bees when The herd hits that season I can’t even reload When she goin’ Beastmode.
Animal, animal Want that Animal, animal Want that Animal, animal Want that Animal, animalCant Stop Us - Pony Renaissance AnthemPit Crew2023-04-13 | It feels like we really are in a second boom of pony content these days, with more art and music and discussion than I've felt like we've had since the original drop-off, and the vibe just seems really strong. Content keeps coming, cons keep going, friendships keep arising, and I had the uge to make something celebrating that. Many thanks to Chompy and especially to Snowy Charm for editing advice on this one; Snowy lent me his ear and critique on several drafts that I think really helped the end product.
A new golden age. The pony resurgency. The renaissance. It’s time to come back, so get your pony suit, get your plushy, and get your ass on the floor. Let’s go!
Catch me on the dance floor I’m the one With the rainbow unicorn horn Eyes shut while I jump I’m so high The sky ducked Ponies gimme a hard on And I go off like a carbomb In Belfast You smell that Beat (Hell Yeah) That’s stardom Cut a rail of that stardust Like Twilight Sparkle power scaling Alpha males and Hasbro markets Thirstier than some bar nuts Hard cut to the next- Rhythm Breaking my neck- Get em I’m gonna flex- ‘Tism I’m having sex- With em Watch my inflection Only one direction Left to go and you should know it Celestia, here’s the lesson Headstrong, balls out And here’s the callout To all the motherfuckers Who think it’s too late to start out Golden age starts now Get the markers out Disposition so damn Sunny You can call me Starscout Outbound, out, proud Outside of the box now Inside of the chimney Say it with me we gonna shout loud
Can’t stop us Nah headed straight to the top motherfucker Can’t stop us And we got it on lock Can’t stop us Every time we let the beat drop no Can’t stop us So ponies lemme hear those hooves stomp
Straight to the peak of the mountain Into the teeth of the dragon Bringing the heat spitting fire Tired but never retired Burning desire for the Good old days to come again They never expired We got the magic we only need the friends We only need the rosy tinted lenses Inspiration, instigating this insurgency We only know how to win We only know how to poni poni We only know how to live We only know that we’re going Up cause that’s what I’ve got to give We’re on a rescue mission Never can rest the vision Just to bring some joy so boyo This shit is important, listen We die when we tap out When you wanna cry: shout We’ll pilfer every silver lining Out of every killer cloud Outlawed And outgunned Our jobs Just to have fun Unbound And undone Countdown Just to hit one
Can’t stop us Nah headed straight to the top you Can’t stop us And we got it on lock Can’t stop us Every time we let the beat drop you know you Can’t stop us So ponies lemme hear those hooves stomp
So grab your marker pens And colored pencils, time to begin Quick design an OC pony Bonus points for all the cringe Into the breach, enter the beast All of my energy into this beat Hit ‘em with these spit that I speak Until I’m beaten onto my knees And even when I’m fallen I’m crawling I’m brawling every cotton pickin varmint Darnit and calling out every top and bottom So let your mane down, and get those hooves up To the music stomp those horseshoes Let the groove fuck The days new, the dawn sun shines like bronze yus It’s on unto dusk till songs turn to dust If I had a freaking dime for every time they said that we died RIP the fandoms over, fuck it then I could retire Buy an island, covered in diamonds, sapphire jet and learn how to fly But I guess they were wrong about it every single time So every kinky motherfucker drawing clop Every single person sewin plush or writing bars Never stop
Can’t stop us Nah headed straight to the top motherfucker Can’t stop us And we got it on lock Can’t stop us Every time we let the beat drop you know you Can’t stop us So ponies lemme hear those hooves stomp You can’t stop us.5:15 - MLP FanmusicPit Crew2023-03-25 | Yes. This is the correct time to upload a song about insomnia. Lots of thanks to Chompy for working with me on this and giving it a beautiful guitar track. Based on this familiar image/series twibooru.org/680688, this is a song about wasting the opportunity to dream about my sweet Derpy by staying awake. This is a bad thing. I think I ought to go to bed now.
The day’s never over The work’s never done The night’s getting older At the nadir of the sun But the weight pressing on my shoulders Moves the clock to quarter one When I slip below the covers And my lullabies are sung
Singing lulay, lulay Leave the word behind Lulay lulay You’re running out of time
With deep golden eyes And a bright shining smile I just want to lie here And hold her a while I know the dawn’s coming But I’ll stay in her wings For that short span of midnight Until 5:15
Like clockwork celestial The earth in its sphere Spins onward perpetual ‘Til days become years My labouring breaths and the Gray by my ears Say “Only in rest will You outrun your fears.”
Singing lulay, lulay Leave the word behind Lulay lulay You’re running out of time
With deep golden eyes And a bright shining smile I just want to lie here And hold her a while I know the dawn’s coming But I’ll stay in her wings For that short span of midnight Until 5:15
Escapements unwinding The bells start to ring The day comes to find me I’ve slept not a wink I’ve wasted my time And I’ve wasted my dreams Another lost midnight And now 5:15
Singing lulay, lulay Leave the word behind Lulay lulay You’re running out of time
With deep golden eyes And a bright shining smile I just want to lie here And hold her a while I know the dawn’s coming But I’ll stay in her wings For that short span of midnight Until 5:15 That short span of midnight Until 5:15Flower, the Dumb Robot - Pony FanmusicPit Crew2023-03-19 | Original video by youtube.com/@THE1LFO : youtu.be/rohvbRKHTnA If you haven't seen it GO SEE IT. And give that fool a like and subscribe, cause holy toledo, what a great short. I mean like, good enough that I watched it late last night and had the song written before noon. Inspiring. It's great to see such amazing and incredible work still coming out of the fandom. Way to go friends. Many thanks to LF0 for giving me the nod to use their content for this song and video, super appreciated!
Hello and welcome to the demonstration Here at Pony Laboratories We create a world Run by imagination What we envision is A nation where our roboponies Change the face of not just only Enterprises but situations Far beyond the scope of any Hope dreamed of before but I won’t bore you with the Ordinary words I know that you’re impatient So let me introduce: The replacement you Better than a human you can see she got The pony hooves IQ a million Chess playin’ brilliant Put her on the microphone She killin’ it Up inside the laboratory chillin’ What a silly pony fully in Defiance you can’t put her in a category But you bet your ass That she keter class XK scenario Every time she givin’ sass And she ain’t never heard of three laws Who the hell is Asimov? Slacking off, hurt a human laugh it off
This is Flower, the Dumb Robot Fully uncontainable every time she go off This is Flower, the Dumb Robot Hooves made of rubber and a brain made of cobalt This is Flower, the Dumb Robot I’m trying not to think it but her stripy socks are so hot This is Flower, the Dumb Robot I don’t need it anyway, she can have my whole heart
Mint green model with the fuzzy pink kicks on Shit son, I think I’m freaking feelin’ things. Is this wrong? The way she “eee,” she don’t even hit the diphthong My heart is a bowling pin And Flower kickin trick shots What a trip, she’s a freakin’ lunatic automatic And the static in her system outta tick Picture perfect pervy personality and pertinent To our perpetual annoyance she’s a perky pony Perpetrating periodic peccadillos Ate eleven kilos Of my cds as a meal so For real though Grab your steel toes, hi-vis and hard hats We’re inside the danger zone and I have the scars that Make me question why we gave her fangs in the first place But dang it when she smile I’m in love again with her face Curvaceous, I love the way this Bap pony breaks and All that I can say is
This is Flower, the Dumb Robot Fully uncontainable every time she go off This is Flower, the Dumb Robot Hooves made of rubber and a brain made of cobalt This is Flower, the Dumb Robot I’m trying not to think it but her stripy socks are so hot This is Flower, the Dumb Robot I don’t need it anyway, she can have my whole heart
Half crazy, and half lazy, and you amaze me Flower are you doin’ it on purpose? Maybe. And I’ve been thinking lately Pretty lady, if it isn’t super shady Maybe you could even date me? Plug in and unplug Twenty kilonewton hugs And a struggle just to breathe When she snuggles me Please don’t save me From her electric rabies Going to her brain like HAL Singing with me, Daisy, Daisy
This is Flower, the Dumb Robot Fully uncontainable every time she go off This is Flower, the Dumb Robot Hooves made of rubber and a brain made of cobalt This is Flower, the Dumb Robot I’m trying not to think it but her stripy socks are so hot This is Flower, the Dumb Robot I don’t need it anyway, she can have my whole heartRest - MLP FanmusicPit Crew2023-03-11 | I worked more than a couple late nights on this one, and the irony is not lost on me. These days it seems like rest is mostly just a barrier in the way of accomplishing all the work and projects and socializing that needs to happen, but maybe it's ok to take a break every now and again.
You’re working hard all week Snootle to the Grindstone Hooves on the street skipping time zones You’re a kind soul In a blindfold See how your life shines Even with your eyes closed And when you hold me close You’re so warm like a snowmare Making me chuckle Ho, ho, there Hold the phone, hold up And now that we’ve grown up I don’t think we’ll ever blow up Big, never leave a limousine when we roll up With mares in tuxedos Like Joe Mr. Donuts But it won’t hold us back Nobody owns us No one here to scold us When we break the mold, yes And here’s a bonus fact You’re not alone, nah Anywhere you go I’ll Be there by your shoulder So damn predictable Happy with my old ruts Count sixteen, take it to the chorus
It’s time to rest Put your head on the pillow, with a purpose You’ve tried your best Sweet dreams little filly you deserve this And while you sleep I’ll keep You safe little sunbeam Comf, coze and cuddly And when you wake we’ll take Anything the world tries You and I we’ll fly
We’ll fly And we’ll shine our lights So close Your eyes, And hold me tight
And you say that it hurts With the weight of the world On your Withers We can carry that together And you only look around before the pain inside your heart starts Happy is a far mark You’re a star spark burning in the darkness Look into your calendar Every days a long list So Queue the song list You know who’s the strongest Before the suns gone We can make a small dent So if you’re ever feeling low maybe lonely Just remember that you’re my little pony If you ever need a cry or a smile Just for a while filly you can always hold me And with our friends to remind us Always there behind us we’ll take to the sky You and I, yes You can be the princess Your royal highness Now get your heinie into bed Close your eyes, just-
Just Let me tuck you in so snug You’re safe little stinkbug I'm gonna turn the lights down And I’ll pull the covers up Just Let me tuck you in so snug You’re safe little stinkbug I'm gonna turn the lights down And I’ll pull the covers up
It’s time to rest Put your head on the pillow, with a purpose You’ve tried your best Sweet dreams little filly you deserve this And while you sleep I’ll keep You safe little sunbeam Comf, coze and cuddly And when you wake we’ll take Anything the world tries You and I we’ll flyLast Dance (Live)Pit Crew2023-03-05 | Chompy performing Last Dance live and in the flesh at Anthro New England 2023!Slumber Party - MLP Convention Music [HarmonyCon 2023 Release]Pit Crew2023-02-19 | Is there anything more magical than meeting internet friends in real life? Yes. And that's meeting your internet friends' cute plushies. There's something so special about spending time with folks, having conversations way later than you ought, meeting new friends, new plush, and generally leaving the comfort zone of the internet to spend a weekend remembering that the avatars on your screen have faces too. I've had such an amazing time at HarmonyCon every year I've been, and this was no exception. Thanks to all my dear friends with whom I got to spend this time. Lets do it again soon. Love ya. /)
Note: This song and video represent my own, personal (wonderful) HarmonyCon experience and are not sponsored by or associated with the HarmonyCon event, staff, or organizers in any capacity.
It’s party weekend. And we up in the con Singing songs, dancing, laughing and Drinking. Pass on that sleeping Put a foot on the gas till the Night passed sun starts to creep in And the room up on floor ten We can fit more in And we won’t even close the door Until it’s 4am
We don’t sleep We only slumber party We don’t count sheep We counting out the body Shots Counting down before the con stops Nonstop headbop jumping guess that’s why they call me hip hop Until my head hits the pillow and my lids drop We take this party to the tip top
Three day party weekend get the homies from the airport Weapons grade autism got the hotel pretty scared for What we prepared for; triple shifting janitors But we keep it careful with the mare and horses therefore Party room is squeaky clean If we talking littering If we talking horses then it’s Criminally obscene Got the body pillow fort All my buddys from the board Even met some from the Dusty Busty discord So let the liquor pour Bouncing like a tennis court You can call me Littlepip Taking shots I can’t afford Fifth of wild Pegasus Got me kinda pistol whipped We be getting dizzy Till our eyes are crossed like Derpy Ditz And I’m getting hit on by a lady in a ponysuit Girl you ain’t my waifu I don’t care you thinking I be cute You ain’t my pretty gray Pegasus so hate to say Pick another man but first Please crank the music all the way
I only see y’all once a year and see I I know you know that you’re all so dear To me I feel the love and that festive cheer when we Are close enough to hug right here
Before I even finish seeing, meeting, greeting people They talkin “come to trot” like we was freaking needing sequels I’m booping plushies; I don't know if that shits even legal The Brits are leaving for the shooting range to finger Deagles I see no evil, I hear no evil speak no e-vil We here to party, friendship magic, buddies we chill So grab somebody, pony plushie, brushie we will Just keep it coming until Celestia lights up for real You got your dakimakura This weeb be chomping pocky up But when in Rome I guess I’m Roman Pour that sake in my cup Hitting up that artist comm Drawing clop until the dawn Then Party in the parking lot Cause someone set us up the bomb And when it’s time to go home I hope to heck that you know I love you people and I always will Just like I love pones Wrap it up and we crash And taking ten hour naps I hope that you had a blast Now one more time while it lasts
It’s party weekend. And we up in the con Singing songs, dancing, laughing and Drinking. Pass on that sleeping Put a foot on the gas till the Night passed sun starts to creep in And the room up on floor ten We can fit more in And we won’t even close the door Until it’s 4am
We don’t sleep We only slumber party We don’t count sheep We counting out the body Shots Counting down before the con stops Nonstop headbop jumping guess that’s why they call me hip hop Until my head hits the pillow and my lids drop We take this party to the tip topRed Zone - Cyberpunk Pony FanmusicPit Crew2023-02-01 | Back to bustin'! mp3 available for download here: mediafire.com/file/f4iyd6q3stod2lg/Red+Zone.mp3/file
Welcome to utopia. Rush of dopamine when I open up. Smog choked, and the neon glows. Is this a paradise? Close enough. Cold smoke in the stratosphere, Atmosphere so thick you could capture fear; Smell the ozone, got you folks in a chokehold. Trapped like a unicorn captive:cracks appear. Acid rain set to splash again; Cash I make stained like the cracked terrain. Sky to scrape-skyline is blast in twain. If I’m feeling violent is that insane? Am I to blame-why? If the magic left and left Cyberspace chains like a spider's web. Driver plate chimes like a castanet, And the dynamos whine when I snap my neck.
Got my cyborg leg on. I’m a cyber legend. And my cypher’s dead on. Take it right to the red zone. Got my cyborg leg on. I’m a cyber legend. And my cypher’s dead on. Take it right to the red zone.
Canterlot lost, and the cancer crawls, When the land went rancid, I’m standing tall With my four hooves planted; I’ll handle y’all. Step to me? Panic and plan to fall. Changed flesh for a carbon mesh; Plastic Polymer pulses inside my chest; Don’t sleep and my blood is blessed. Only thing that’s equine-my seizing breath. In my breast is the beat of machinery, Matching step with the grease of the scenery. Are these wings on my back? Well they seem to be; Spread ‘em out like a bat with a steam release. Eyes glow in the infrared, And the telescope goes when I tip my head. Silicone bones in this silly ol’ pone, But the steel below bows when I kick my leg.
Got my cyborg leg on. I’m a cyber legend. And my cypher’s dead on. Take it right to the red zone. Got my cyborg leg on. I’m a cyber legend. And my cypher’s dead on. Take it right to the red zone.
The moon is wrong; the stars are gone; The concrete groans with the souls of a million pones; The Monsters roam coated in flashing chrome. My only comfort: this plasma gun. Calibrate the beam to kill When I calculate their strength to heal. In the deeps of this city sleeps The creeping Caliphate of Steel. In the trash of the tangled warrens Where I wear my mask when I ignore the warnings. I’m the master, the shepherd, warden, And my task to restore the morning. So I face what the city brings; The smoke and streets open beneath my wings. Unprogrammed like broken strings, And my code is the song I sing.
Got my cyborg leg on. I’m a cyber legend. And my cypher’s dead on. Take it right to the red zone. Got my cyborg leg on. I’m a cyber legend. And my cypher’s dead on. Take it right to the red zone.Silver and Gold - MLP Derpy and Carrot Top MusicPit Crew2023-01-24 | The best Derpy matchup of them all, fite me.
I've always loved the Derpy/Carrot Top friendship, and I've been feeling especially nostalgic for it lately. "I emptied your fridge" is an absolutely blessed tag that needs more content, so I wrote a song for it.
mp3 available for download here: https://u.smutty.horse/mljknzktxcg.mp3
I caught her breaking in the fridge again It was half past four and the score Was carrot cake and muffins I had a padlock She made a backdoor With a hacksaw Battleaxe and blowtorch And in her backup plans There was a saddlebag of C4
Derpy, Derpy Hooves and Carrot it Never gets old Perfect, perfect duo you could swear We go together like Silver And Gold Best friends forever And never, never, never Find any ponies even half as beautiful together My oh my and I might not fly, but when I look in her eyes I know we’re two birds of a feather
She flies this way Her shining smile makes my day Her happiness, immutable
Her heart is a song And she might not know what went wrong How can she be so beautiful?
I caught her breaking in the fridge again It was just gone two and she knew I had spinach puffs and dumplins I had a laser grid She had a laser saw I reinforced the door She employed a roboclaw And where she got the Plasma torch I’ll never know
Derpy, Derpy Hooves and Carrot it Never gets old Perfect, perfect duo you could swear We go together like Silver And Gold Best friends forever And never, never, never Find any ponies even half as beautiful together My oh my and I might not fly, but when I look in her eyes I know we’re two birds of a feather
Her heart is Golden as the Harvest fields of grain A little Ditzy but I do believe she’s perfect all the same She may be trouble, but she fills my soul with hope and bubbles In fact I only have one wish: Miss Derpy please stop ransacking the fridge
Derpy, Derpy Hooves and Carrot it Never gets old Perfect, perfect duo you could swear We go together like Silver And Gold Best friends forever And never, never, never Find any ponies even half as beautiful together My oh my and I might not fly, but when I look in her eyes I know we’re two birds of a featherZimblesterns Heart Carol - A My Little Pony Song Arranged for OrganPit Crew2022-12-23 | mp3 available for download here: https://u.smutty.horse/mjyzntnoqkt.mp3
Arrangement based on the Heart Carol from My Little Pony by Daniel Ingram.
Performed by the long suffering Jade Arpeggio who basically had the sheet music poorly (very poorly) rendered out of Reaper because I wrote it out in piano rolls and just can't into MuseScore and thrust, terrible format and all, in front of him, then told "Ok, now make it good, we're gonna do two takes and then I've got to go." Of course, I'd love it if I could capture the sound a little better; the church has a truly marvelous Schoenstein organ that simply isn't represented by the single shotgun mic that I brought to the table, but still hopefully some of that comes across. And just huge enormous big thanks to Gobiraptor for the beautiful art. There's actually a couple of Zimblestern pieces, and I had such a time choosing between them. You can find more of her work here: twitter.com/Gobiraptor
So backstory: the owner of the pictured OC, Zimblestern the Zebra, and I share the common, odd, real life backstory of having spent some time actually living in little flats at churches, and when I went to write a little green for her character I wanted to capture the feeling of being alone in a great big open space like a church (or, for Zimblestern, the great hall of a school) late at night with an organ. This great big instrument that fills up that empty space, or maybe sometimes doesn't, and just...it's special. Being in the dark up in a choir loft with none of the lights on and a big acoustic space and organ music. Honestly, I wasn't even sure at the time that rl Zimblestern's church would have had an organ, but it turn's out she did, and it was great resonance. I love it. You know what; I'll pull the cheese out and just go ahead and post the scene, why the heck not.
Be Zimbelstern the Zebra The great hall of the school is different at night. Not just quieter. Not just darker. Something about the space changes when you take away the students and the bustle, leaving a hole in the atmosphere crying out to be filled, a hole that, when unattended, filled itself with old echoes and creaks, and the mysterious smells of spices and evergreen, even when the big tree hadn’t gone up yet. The weight of that silence-the wrongness of it- always feels compelling for you; pressing you to turn the keys on the blower to fill the reservoirs and prime the bellows. The grand organ on the second level is a towering affair of the old school, with a central clock, and a façade covered in darkly stained oak and silver filigree, with splashes of gold ornamentation accenting the hauptwerk and ruckspositiv. Some of them move, too, in a display of craftsponyship unusual on any machine from the past two centuries. Pulling the Vox Equinas stop causes a wooden pony’s head beneath the clock to open and close its mouth, while the swell pedal rotated a silver moon and golden sun around the top to match the dynamic. The bassoon, for whatever reason, opened a little door and popped out a tiny wooden filly painted green like a cuckoo clock. And, of course, atop the case, the many pointed star connected to your namesake zimbelstern spins and twinkles on command. Above the clock the moon was out now, as you ease the shutters shut on the quiet melody. It’s an old carol, reworked only a little for performance at a slow and easy pace made for listening instead of singing. Outside the hall an early snowfall is coming down onto the yet-unfallen leaves, just enough to speckle the trees and build tiny drifts in crooks and crannies, and a north wind does it’s best to match key with the song The big tree won’t go up in the hall behind you for a little moment yet, but the weather tonight was asking for an early Hearth’s Warming nocturne. It’s hard to wait for the season to begin, and really, what harm is there in getting a little practice in before the season really starts. It won’t be long before every corner has a brass quartet, every doorstep a group of carolers and every phonograph a well worn cylinder of holiday favorites. Tonight though, with the trees still fiery in orange and yellow, Hearth’s Warming is your own private affair. And that, you think as you pull the zimblestern and let the tiny bells sparkle, is just fine.In The Workshop - Happy MLP Holiday MusicPit Crew2022-12-22 | I love going out and losing myself in making a giveaway prize or Christmas gift for a friend. I love smelling the sawdust, and letting Christmas music or an audiobook drown out the dremel and saws and just focusing in on something small and accomplishable in a world full of tasks that are too big. I keep most of my cards in a couple of binders, but I have just a couple, one or two from friends that I can look at and feel like I have friends there alongside me, being part of that Horsemas cheer. And I love that. And this is a song about that.
mp3 available for download here: https://u.smutty.horse/mkudsdwefan.mp3
It’s Horsemas at the North Pole Icebergs drifting by the front door And on the factory floor Elfen ponies working over Time to reach the deadlines While fillies stay up past their bedtime To see if Santa Pone will come tonight She just might Right! The elves are working on conveyor belts and Santa Pone is Busy making seventeen new types of cum tube hoses Thirty seven equine rubber molds for all the colts and Fillies Cause the silly gifts they wish for in their silliness A shaft of silky silicone ain’t even half the silliest This year It’s Horsemas in the Workshop welcome here
Here we are at the top of the planet Every shooting star marks another wish we’ve granted No matter who you are, well I hope you understand How very very much you’re loved this time of year In the Workshop well you’re always welcome here
Hear those silver sleigh bells jingle Swim a lap with Missus Kringle Friends around and time to mingle Toys for every freakin single Person full of merriment and cheer In the workshop well you’re always welcome here!
The night is fast approachin Sweaters, scarves and overcoats and Snowflakes fallin, floating Merry carols, fire’s smokin Ponies working triple shifts Searching, shopping, laughing, crafting And wrapping up their santees special gift It’s perfect Yep! The air is chilly but the fire of friendship’s burning brightly The borealis dances like a string of Horsemas lights see, High above us moving ever toward that special night we Might be Less than always perfect (but) I see all your extra work and I think you are heckin worth it Dear, In the workshop, friend you’re always welcome here
Here we are at the top of the planet Every shooting star marks another wish we’ve granted No matter who you are, well I hope you understand How very very much you’re loved this time of year In the workshop well you’re always welcome here
Hear those silver sleigh bells jingle Swim a lap with Missus Kringle Friends around and time to mingle Toys for every freakin single Person full of merriment and cheer In the workshop well you’re always welcome- (Loved and cherished, saying, “well done”) Workshop, well you’re always welcome here!Hearths Warming on the Beach - A Kiwi ChrimmusPit Crew2022-12-21 | A Hearth's Warming song for my friends who live upside down, especially for that one Kiwi we love and know. May he rest in peace. (I'm writing this hours before publication so, based on precedent, presumably he has died by the time this posts.) Thanks Kiwi, for all you do to keep /mlp/ Secret Santa ticking in down where gravity is reversed and everyone walks upside down all the time.
Can I get an F down in the comments to commemorate his inevitable loss?
mp3 is available for download here: https://u.smutty.horse/mkvmnlavnzw.mp3
I got my shades down. Spaced out. Lounging in the shade by the Waves now. Listen to the sea breeze and the sweet sound Of the seagulls; gonna drink until I’m Face down.
Well I’ll be chilling on the beach with a bottle of rum; I’ve got my mane in the breeze and my feet in the sun, In the shade of the trees, and I’ll be living life easy When they see me saying, "Kiwi gonna Rest In Peace." And I’ll be upside down with my hooves on the ground, And it’s no wonder that the underside when you come around For Merry Christmas in my hemisphere it’s summer in your winter, dear So stow that coat and put on your bikini to lounge.
I’m glad to be where the daiquiris Are gonna be flowin' free ; Laughin', have to be, and I’ll concede That I know my philosophies ain’t exactly Socrates Cloppin, to my doctor and Tossin, all my soccer games. Lying cozy in the shade; Dying almost every day; Find me in a hammock, Or maybe find me at a wake. Lazy by the ocean, and I’m Swaying to the motion Of a crazy little notion known as Mixin up a potion. You can freeze in your Snow White Season well it’s all right; Grab somepony, hold tight. I prefer a colt; I keep on taking my time Shakin' up a mai tai; Eyein' up those mighty fine Stallion butts. My, my... Sippin' margaritas While you folks are blasting heaters, And if Santa Pone don’t cheat us Day’ll be here soon. Life is way to short and risky, And my boss ain’t gonna miss me, So I’ll pour another whiskey, And I’ll sing me a tune.
(And it goes)
Well I’ll be chilling on the beach with a bottle of rum; I’ve got my mane in the breeze and my feet in the sun In the shade of the trees and I’ll be living life easy, When they see me saying, "Kiwi gonna Rest In Peace." And I’ll be upside down with my hooves on the ground, And it’s no wonder that the underside when you come around For Merry Christmas in my hemisphere it’s summer in your winter, dear So stow that coat and put on your bikini to lounge.
Yeah I’ll be chilling on the beach with a bottle of rum; I’ve got my mane in the breeze and my feet in the sun In the shade of the trees and I’ll be living life easy, When they see me saying, "Kiwi gonna Rest In Peace." When they see me saying, "Kiwi gonna Rest In Peace." When they see me saying, "Kiwi. May he Rest In Peace."If I Had a Secret Santa - MLP Holiday ParodyPit Crew2022-12-20 | From the Barenaked Ponies, a song pondering well...what if I had a Secret Santa?
If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) I'd get them a plush -I would get them a plush If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) I'd get them socks for their new plush -Something with a high thread count and stripes If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) I'd get them a fluffy scarf -With colors that would match their brand new plush socks! If I had a Secret Santa I'd send them love!
If I had a Secret Santa -I would make sure that they had a card! If I had a Secret Santa -I could make it from paper, it's not that hard! If I had a Secret Santa -I'd make sure to put a picture of their favorite pony in there Oooh and a sticker. Oooo! Or a whole sticker book so they could put them wherever they wanted! -Maybe some velcro or iron on patches You know you’re supposed to say ‘hook and loop’ now. -Well I guess it’ll have to be iron-on then.
If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) I would write them a green -Just a cutesy little OC green for fun If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) I’d write a song to go with that green. -Nothing fancy just a couple of bars. If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) Well I’d doodle them something cute -Get the crayons out scribble on some printer paper If I had a Secret Santa I'd send them love!
If I had a Secret Santa -I wouldn’t have to go find friends! If I had a Secret Santa -I’d stay online and buy them gifts instead If I had a Secret Santa -We wouldn’t have to talk to our plushies. But we still would talk to our plushies! -Of course, just about holiday things for our santee! And we’d decorate the plushies with festive antlers -and tinsel and little strings of lights! Like those Christmas light necklaces you buy at the store. -yeah!
If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) Well I’d buy them a doll -But not a Peanut Doll that’s cruel If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) Well I’d buy them an art -Lots of excellent vendors at your local cons If I had a Secret Santa (If I had a Secret Santa) I’d buy them a donkey -If they waifu Octavia! If I had a Secret Santa I’d send them love.
If I had a Secret Santa If I had a Secret Santa If I had a Secret Santa I wouldn’t grinch.
A parody of If I Had a Million Dollars by The Barenaked Ladies.Youre a Mean One, Sleigh Bell Scree - MLP Holiday Parody SongPit Crew2022-12-19 | From Snowy Charm for the 2022 /mlp/ Secret Santa, a song for a pony so fould, so cruel, so utterly devoid of heart, that he donated to a charity for no other reason than to take it back afterwards. (Not really; he's a sweetie.)
You're a mean one Sleigh Bell Scree I'm shocked you've not been shot You steal back food from orphan's mouths and leave them all to rot Sleigh Bell Scree You're a bad omelette that Chompy just forgot
You're a monster Sleigh Bell Scree Your Santa should rethink You deserve the worst of peanut's wrath Should be thrown inside the clink Sleigh Bell Scree Why don't you take the jar and imbibe your second drink
You're a cruel one Sleigh Bell Scree A bat with no remorse You hold no love for Verity Nor any colored horse Sleigh Bell Scree Your loyalty is so lacking that your waifu, rainbow dash, well.. She wants a divorce
You're so rotten Sleigh Bell Scree You'll not recieve that lamp A chance you won't recover from If given half the chance Sleigh Bell Scree You were held back five years in highschool with no option to advance
You nauseate me Sleigh Bell Scree You EEEE'd into my ear You think a carol fixes things It absolves you from arrears Sleigh Bell Scree You're a garrish green abomination between the marriage of malaligned merriment and misery compounded with cacophonous jingle jangle gibberish vehemntly hated by santa pone only slightly less than green peppers and deplorable to your peers
You're a foul one Sleigh Bell Scree A big green horses flank Gave cash to starving children, put it right back in the bank Sleigh Bell Scree The three words that best describe your heart are as follows are and I quote Shrink, Shrunk, ShrankChrimmus Creeper - Secret Santa MusicPit Crew2022-12-18 | Everyone's worst nightmare (or best dream UwU?), you share your information on the internet in order to get a Christmas gift, but you get more, oh so much more. I'm not even gonna lie, the running anthrax/pipe bomb/sneaking into your house to lick your toes while you sleep gag is hilarious to me, and I'm not sure why. But I sure did do a song about it for this year's Secret Santa.
mp3 available at: https://u.smutty.horse/mklcovuvpvp.mp3
This is the year that I finally Put the fire to vinyl Heat proof, with ice in my style Freeze you in time for revival Peep you and see through your panties Creep on my santee and handing Handies and hoofsies like candies Fantasy fanart by Fanny Featuring fetishes: Leafy Greens groping lettuces Plus as proven by precedent Stinky penises prevalent Cheesy, memey, unseemly I’m preaching peachy believe me My genius keeps me upbeating Plus all these sweets I keep eating My teeth are rotten I’ve gotten all pudgy Fudge eating shove in my tummy Rumcake I’m baking so yummy Come take the drum diddy dummy Pa rump pa pa pump up the boombox Rumchatta come set up the jukebox Rumchatta and some in my juicebox Cum gotta cum into these lewd socks Shoebox of google docs Printout pictures of nude docks and Fetlocks, moon horse’s moon makes me swoon Kung fu you like this was The Boondocks Hit you like boom and I Zip like Zoom Hit the room, and I slip right through Dip, slide move and my dick’s like Coom in their womb and I get my
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and Anybody think make you my spouse Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with Antibody cream it’s going down, and Keep calm and I’m gonna Creep on ya While ya sleep nonny Up in your home No locks or cops Can cockblock or stop me Under ya box spring Watching and clopping Till Dawn
I’m gonna tiptoe To your window. No-clip right into your den so You’re straight, santee, I’m all bent though It’s not gay if I act all fem yo No escape when I mail you a dildo You meme r4p3 but I’m all real though Just kidding; I didn’t mean that Still heads up, might get you a Peanut No mail; coming dee-rect Even though it’s not Halloween yet Santa Pone said I’m too obscene, yep Rap’s too dirty; I better clean that Otherwise she’s gonna put me back On the naughty list for the naughty fags Or a body bag if I push too hard So I’m sorry that I took this too far And I spooked the shark when I shook the floor Dropping bombs like nukes and I took the board Fool of a Took and I booked this whore Named Blizzard Boop and I scooped this chord Courting these courtesans All according to corporate And while I’m driving accords I’ll be Looking fly as a cormorant Spicy like coriander I’m course correcting meandering My erection’s outstanding And all these horses demanding While they forcefully demand my schwing I’m rambling in from random /b/ Unhand my damn OCs I’m Loveseat Shambling I’ll keep on pandering It’s just a fandom thing And I’m the fandom king So let my anthem ring
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and Anybody think make you my spouse Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with Antibody cream it’s going down, and Keep calm and I’m gonna Creep on ya While ya sleep nonny Up in your home No locks or cops Can cockblock or stop me Under ya box spring Watching and clopping Till Dawn
This is the half verse to wrap up Apples like Hapsburgs in hats but Sexy like Miss Coco’s ass butt- Sexing her half up my shaft I’m Sure that you’re not missing it Spits got ridiculous Lyrics hit like pistols in The fists of old Saint Nicholas It’s victimless, it’s so benign In fact I doubt you mind I’ve padded out the time Enough now bring that chorus line Of course and Merry Christmas I’m here to grant your wishes Infamous as Icarus I’ll get too close; I’m gonna visit (You)
Santee gonna sneak up in your house and Anybody think make you my spouse Contaminate the scene they’re gonna douse with Antibody cream it’s going down, and Keep calm and I’m gonna Creep on ya While ya sleep nonny Up in your home No locks or cops Can cockblock or stop me Under ya box spring Watching and clopping Till DawnSnowball Fight - MLP FanmusicPit Crew2022-12-17 | Next in my list of "songs that I wrote to be straightfacedly serious in tone about dumb shit." I don't know why but I have like 4 of them this year; I got into a headspace and was just like, yup, it's time to write songs about cutesy pony stuff and act like it's hard af. I had a lot of fun. Anyway, definitely go listen to the mp3 available here: https://u.smutty.horse/mkthsoumzfe.mp3 because holy smokes neither of my video editors liked this piece at all. Absolutely butchered the audio, and I'm not good enough to reEQ it back into line, which really disappoints me, because I spent a good little while making it nice and not muddy. Anyway, enough whining out of me.
Five below, ice cold Balaclava on my face like a robbery Blowing smoke- out my nose Call me Ben Grimm it’s time for clobbering Gotta lotta these fiends try to stomp on me Freeze all these jobbers like he’s in the watery Seas like he Le-o I’m the fuckin iceberg Easy as sodomy with my fuckin wife herd You’re a nice nerd, me I’m the Ice King See got that spice girl, Scary when I ice sling Pitch like I’m lightning, bitch you can’t fight me I’m the Mighty Mouse and I’m here to save the (Psych!) See I’m here to start fights, blind in the sunlight Sunglasses low it’s a snow day alright And I’m in the mood for a motherbuckin brawl Got a fort in the yard now let’s motherbuckin snowball
FIGHT FIGHT Fill your hooves with snow Keep your head low No winter wrap up We gonna snowball FIGHT Took a hit to the hat Water down my back Hardpack snow I’m throwing that like FIGHT Got a shot to the flank I can take that Tank while buck these Balls perfect aim and FIGHT
Not a snow pone, still gotta throw blows Scarf on my neck, tight sweater like a chokehold I’m tryna reload, fillies got me pinned down It’s a fucking rodeo in a barrel like a clown A ball splashes on the ground right beside me (Shit!) And I’m diving at these bushes tryna hide me (I’m hit!) I’m hit, and another whizzes through my mane, I take aim, buck a hoof and I hit face Let another go to cover my escape I tuck and roll while I’m headed to my base If I can make it to the treehouse quick, I’ll be safe Get to the ladder, shit, and I’m too late It’s in the hooves of the enemy Bucket full of snowballs, them tryna finish me They didn’t calculate that earth pony in though Bucked a snowman through the window, that’s how I buckin
FIGHT FIGHT Fill your hooves with snow Keep your head low No winter wrap up We gonna snowball FIGHT Took a hit to the hat Water down my back Hardpack snow I’m throwing that like FIGHT Got a shot to the flank I can take that Tank while buck these Balls perfect aim and FIGHT
So basically they’re facing a devastation I was lifting weights while they were in the basement stroking their snakes and I’m taking aim and letting ‘em rain with perfect placement A minute ago I was the prey but now I chase them Call me Frosty Flakes ‘cause I’m hunting like a carnivore You’re my little fishes; I’m a shark in the metaphor Metamorphosing me into a monster straight outta Kafka A cockroach even a nuclear bomb can’t topple I’m Godzilla mixed with Mothra: unstoppable Elemental, force of nature, and going to war like a crusader Snowball in my hoof Then I let it go like I’m Elsa I’m like the opposite of a Primarch with a melta I’m going to hell to make sure it freezes over Opening fire so they duck and un for cover You’ll fight in the shade cause I’m fixing to put the light out Right now the blizzard conditions are a white out inside this snowball
FIGHT FIGHT Fill your hooves with snow Keep your head low No winter wrap up We gonna snowball FIGHT Took a hit to the hat Water down my back Hardpack snow I’m throwing that like FIGHT Got a shot to the flank I can take that Tank while buck these Balls perfect aim and FIGHTYou Should Know - A Song for Santa PonePit Crew2022-12-15 | Thank you, Santa Pone, for the years of work, the long hours and sleepless nights, and the bottomless caring you have shown for us.
Santa Pone statue art done by Maplecakes the Kirin.
One cold winter not that long ago A shark was watching us from far below It seemed that there was something we might need That we were lacking in festivity She took a risk on us and saw the good inside Pulled us all together at Hearth's Warming time, and now
You should know That before you came along I had nowhere to belong. But now you Say you have to go Know the gift you gave to us will be cherished for the rest of our lives. This is not goodbye.
Piles of letter, sleepless nights up late Running sign-ups, posting Save the Date's Showed us what friendship could really be And good Lord, I can imagine some of the things you've seen Through it all you always found the time To pull us all together at Hearth's Warming Time, and now
You should know That the work you put in here has spread warmth and festive cheer. But now you Say you have to go Know the gift you gave to us will be cherished for the rest of our lives. This isn't goodbye.
The seasons' upon us and I hope you'll say That it was all worth it at the end of the day We'll be there for you whenever you're in need You gave us more than friendship, you built a family From around the globe we let the magic shine Let's all pull together for Hearth's Warming time. And now...
You should know That the work you put in here has spread warmth and festive cheer. But now you Say you have to go Know the gift you gave to us will be cherished for the rest of our lives. This is not goodbye.Horsemas in Girafrica - Happy MLP FanmusicPit Crew2022-12-12 | Everypony and everycreature got together to celebrate Hearth's Warming in Girafrica this year, and it was very wholesome and good and nice. Because there's nothing wrong with a cheesy let's-all-be-friends song. World needs more of 'em.
mp3 available here: https://u.smutty.horse/mkonboitehl.mp3
It’s Horsemas in Girafrica, And the zebras gather round To paint the baobab and stripes of red and green From roots to crown. A caravan of camels Coming from exotic sands Brought cardigans and flannels And a 10 piece Germane polka band.
It’s Horsemas in Girafrica. Of course you’re welcome friend, So yak it up With yaks and antelopes, Snowponies, Diamond Dogs, And shoot the breeze with breezies Even baps and moths.
A herd of wild wildebeest Who don’t know what to do On their very Hearth’s Warming Eve. (Guess you could say they’re kind of gnu.) The caribou can teach them Of the snowy arctic north, Where borealis dance the sky Above the frozen earth.
And the snow That sparkles in The heavy sun. (Oh, it hugs the horizon) You can go; You’ll be welcomed friend Each and everyone. (The worlds so surprisin.') You should know That they’ve gotten love to spend, So go and join the fun. (See the joy in their eyes, friend.) But here and now, Amongst the cheering crowd, You’re in Girafrica, And a giraffe is hanging up a star upon the highest bough.
It’s Horsemas in Girafrica. Of course you’re welcome friend, So yak it up With yaks and antelopes, Snowponies, Diamond Dogs, And shoot the breeze with breezies Even baps and moths.
A swarm of changelings left their hive to be here, In Girafrica with the gazelles and zebras. The buffalo have turned out in force this year, And the Kyrin are passing round their Horsemas "beer." And all painting gourds up as ornaments under the sapphire skies. (Hanging them up in the sapphire skies.) And jam the savanna with laughter and happiness into the night. (Party and play 'til the sunlight.) Telling old tales 'round the tree while the fireflies flicker in flight. (Twinkling beetles and glowbrights.) Might not be the Horsemas you’re used to, but that’s why it’s right. (Everything’s perfect with you by my side.)
It’s Horsemas in Girafrica. Of course you’re welcome friend, So yak it up With yaks and antelopes, Snowponies, Diamond Dogs, And shoot the breeze with breezies Even baps and moths.
(Maybe a Letter Dragon or a Great White Sherk.)Gifting for You - FoE Hearths Warming ParodyPit Crew2022-12-10 | Inspired by the wonderful Cherenkhoof green in the 2022 /mlp/ Secret Santa.
mp3 available here: https://u.smutty.horse/mjrydrqsrbj.mp3
Gifting for you is easy gifting Miss Squeezy to give a gift of love And I’ve so much love In my heart to give to you
You’ll never expect the gifts I’m sending Miss Squeezy I simp- -ly am in love My Hearths Warming Eve is complete When I spend it with you
For you. I might just be a fool with a gun. Mesmerized, you rule me with one Raise of your hoof, Ma’am it’s the truth And I’m the livin proof that
Gifting for you is easy gifting Miss Squeezy I’d give the stars above This Hearths Warming all that I ask is a gift of you.
For you. I might just be a fool with a gun. Mesmerized, you rule me with one Raise of your hoof, Ma’am it’s the truth And I’m the livin proof that
Gifting for you is easy gifting Miss Squeezy, I’d give the stars above
Living for you is easy living It's easy to live when you're in love And I'm so in love There's nothing in life but youI Dont Want to Set the Board On Fire - FoE Hearths Warming FanmusicPit Crew2022-12-10 | Done in tandem with the wonderful Cherenkhoof green in the 2022 /mlp/ Secret Santa. Because sometimes names.
mp3 available here: https://u.smutty.horse/mjqwpkbiqvw.mp3
I don’t want to set the board on fire I just want to wear, a name with my art In my heart there is but one desire And that one is (you)s no other will do
I’ve got no ambition for money or fame I’m just out here whoring for your love I need your attention; it’s all that I crave I’ve externalized all of my self worth such that
I don’t want to set the board on fire I just want to wear, a name with my art
Now here I don’t want to start a flame war and set the board on fire I just want to put on a nametag when I’m posting art In my cold dead heart there is but one desire And that one desire is (you)s no other will do
I’ve got no ambition for money or fame I’m just out here whoring for your love I need your attention; it’s all that I crave I’ve externalized all of my self worth such that
I don’t want to set the board on fire I just want to wear, a name with my art.Is You Is Or Is You Aint My Santee - MLP Holiday ParodyPit Crew2022-12-10 | kek, just noticed the editing artifact hanging out around the audio visualizer. Noice.
Inspired by the FoE Cherenkhoof green in the 2022 /mlp/ Secret Santa. Admittedly, it's not quite a perfect tonal fit for Fallout, but I thought it was close and I had lyrics in mind.
mp3 available here: https://u.smutty.horse/mkcvnpapvdf.mp3
I got a ‘non who doesn’t post; Anytime I look he ghosts, But I love him; yes I love him. Mmm don’t mean to brag and don’t mean to boast; I’m gonna fly from coast to coast. Gonna find him, then I’m gonna ask him:
Is you is or is you ain’t my santee? The way you're actin' lately makes me doubt. You's is still my santee, Santee. Seems our fire of friendships done gone out.
A nonny is a creature that has always been a shid. Just when you think you’ve cornered him you’ll find he’s gone and quit.
Is you is or is you ain’t my santee? Can’t these santees see they make me blue? Or is my santee still my santee true?
Tell me Nonny. Is you still my santee? Where do run off to when I come by the thread? Did I upset you? Are you embarrassed because I know your little peccadilloes? Aww it’s alright, Anon. Just come on back to me, all I wanna do is talk. And after all, ‘tis the season, right? Just come on into the thread and we’ll snuggle up together real close like.
I got a ‘non who doesn’t post Anytime I look he ghosts But I love, yes I love him Mmm don’t mean to brag and don’t mean to boast Gonna fly from coast to coast Gonna find him, then I’m gonna ask him
Is you is or is you ain’t my santee? The way you're actin' lately makes me doubt. You's is still my santee, Santee. Seems our fire of friendships done gone out.
A nonny is a creature that has always been a shid. Just when you think you’ve cornered him you’ll find he’s gone and quit.
Is you is or is you ain’t my santee? Can’t these Santees see they make me blue? Or is my santee still my santee true?Thats My Santee - MLP Holiday ParodyPit Crew2022-12-10 | Inspired by the Cherenkhoof green from the 2022 /mlp/ Secret Santa, cause I wanted to have some more crooner songs, and also because Secret Santa meetups where you know how weird everyone else is, well, they are just beautiful.
https://u.smutty.horse/mjywttvquzh.mp3
That's my santee The one with Pinkie panties I sent them lewds and candies now
Yes, ma'm, my assignment No ma'm, we ain't gonna hide it Yes, ma'm, so get excited now
By the way, by the way When we meet up at a con some happy day I’ll say
Yes sir, That's my santee The one with Pinkie panties I sent them lewds and candies now
Well not just lewds and candies Maybe a dakimakura too, And a very special plush with secret pockets And some accessor to go with it of course Some brownies: with extra protein to keep them healthy Naughty pictures of their waifu I might have snuck a few of myself in there as well A perfectly normal brushable …in a mason jar. Annnnnd a pipe bomb.
By the way, by the way When we meet up at a con some happy day I’ll say
Yes sir, That's my santee The one with Pinkie panties I sent them lewds and candies nowHey At Pone - A Hearths Warming Fallout Equestria ParodyPit Crew2022-12-10 | Done alongside the wonderful Cherenkhoof greentext in the 2022 /mlp/ Secret Santa, and a little celebration of a very, very silly corner of the interbutt.
mp3 available at: https://u.smutty.horse/mjrcitxutde.mp3
The pones are the perkiest The basements the murkiest The ‘nons are the lurkiest The circles the jerkiest The fun the workiest The grins the smirkiest Hey at Pone (At Pone) The cards are the sappiest The dramas the scrappiest The donks are the chappiest The songs are the slappiest The clop the fappiest The friends the happiest Hey at Pone
Don't know why I skipped the signups I really must confess Back another season, Singing my song of poniness The posters the creepiest The jannies the sweepiest The gifts are the keepiest The logic the leapiest (The show?) The shows the leakiest (And you?) And I’m the sleepiest Hey at Pone
(What about the mares) The mares the prettiest (And the shids?) Shids the shiddiest (And the gifts?) Gifts the glittriest (And the trees?) The trees the fiddiest The jokes (are the wittiest) The posters (are hideous) Hey at Pone The boops are the snootiest The plush is the lewdiest The docks the cutiest Stars the shootiest (The memes the funniest) The scenes the sunniest Hey at Pone
Don't know why I skipped the signups I really must confess Back another season, Singing my song of poniness The anthrax the sporiest The greens are the storiest The tourists the touriest The oldfags notorious The arts the horniest The Hearths the Warmiest Hey at Hey at Hey at Pone (No place like Pone) Sweet PoneBiggest Dog on the Block - MLP Holiday Parody Music [Explicit Lyrics]Pit Crew2022-12-07 | Done for the 2022 /mlp/ Secret Santa and set in the Neighborhood shared universe, this story sees a reformed Mr. Paw fall back on some old habits when it comes time to "convince" the other Diamond Dogs to show a little Hearth's Warming cheer. He might be getting on in years a bit, but, well, you read the title. A parody of Slum Chemist by Vinnie Paz.
Mr. Paw artwork was decapitated from a beautiful piece by Fannytastical, go stare in awe at her lovely talents. Used this instrumental beat over here so do all the nice things to them: youtube.com/watch?v=7jeDqH1_I8E
mp3 available to download here: https://u.smutty.horse/mjsvvgdffsz.mp3
The dogs of the under bark The diamond king Pizza cutter bad beast
I like that y’all consider me the bad dog Slap box everywhere, splinters when I smash rocks My blood beastmode, never need to trash talk And I'ma door breaker; tearing out your padlocks You live in fuckin' Underbark and snap claws Your paws too short to touch stars; that’s raw So watch a big mouth turn into a cracked jaw Watch a big house turned into a trash spot Hit ‘em with the double barrel brass shot I’m the kettle, and I’m callin out the black pots I’m the old hat bastard in a past walk Run faster if I catch ya it’s a wrap doc Blow the mic out and barking when I blast vox I sip scotch, set the volume up to CAPSLOCK Forty years and never opened up my cashbox Who’s your ghost of Chrimmus present, bitches THAT’S PAW.
It’s Mr P; I’m the biggest dog on the block It’s Mr P; ain’t no one can fuck with the bark It’s Mr P; you should never fuck with the geezer It’s Mr P; toss ya and I’ll box ya like peetzer
It’s Mr P; I’m the biggest dog on the block It’s Mr P; ain’t no one can fuck with the bark It’s Mr P; you should never fuck with the geezer It’s Mr P; toss ya and I’ll box ya like peetzer
These are borderline coroner rhymes Take a piss on the corner so all the other dogs know it’s mine It’s Hearths Warming Time Ordinary words don’t apply Your grampa Paw, Krampus with a forty and nine A forty of shine, and keep the bottle in my pocket Knockin on my balls, so when I’m thirsty I can cock it Pups can fuckin talk the game, but I already walked it Preaching in the desert like a motherfuckin prophet If you think you got the gospel then you need the truth If you think you gonna scare me then you meet the brute It’s Hearth's Warm all year; I never need a truce I bring the winter pony party; I don’t need to shoot This year? It’s a miracle for Chompy too, Sentimental, cute, if you don’t’n I’ll be chomping you I never ran in my life, I got my walking shoes You gonna drop a little cheer, or am I dropping you?
It’s Mr P; I’m the biggest dog on the block It’s Mr P; ain’t no one can fuck with the bark It’s Mr P; you should never fuck with the geezer It’s Mr P; toss ya and I’ll box ya like peetzer
It’s Mr P; I’m the biggest dog on the block It’s Mr P; ain’t no one can fuck with the bark It’s Mr P; you should never fuck with the geezer It’s Mr P; toss ya and I’ll box ya like peetzer
Hearth's Warming 2022. It’s a time for love and cheer or swear to fuck I’m coming for you.Liquorice Tea - MLP Winter Lofi RapPit Crew2022-12-02 | With many thanks to Gobiraptor for her wonderful voice work. You can catch her doing gorgeous artwork here: twitter.com/gobiraptor And for the unbelievably comfy animation that inspired this song, I'd love to thank a mysterious benefactor who seeks no spotlight or accolades, but sweet Celestia the first time I watched this animation I opened up the DAW and was all "well I guess I'm going to make something lofi for this today."
Liquorice Tea is a bookish cutie from the /mlp/ Secret Santa shared Neighborhood setting, and seeing her so cozy made for a great muse.
mp3 is available for download here: https://u.smutty.horse/mkgsirgltvx.mp3
Sittin in the window with a book on her knees, Turnin’ leaves, sippin’ tea while the snow gathers on the eaves. In the evening, keys jingle in her keyring, “welcome home” When she opens up her door. Long day at work; grab her name sake kettle, pour. Little comfy corner with the snow fallin’ on her porch. From where she’s perched She can see the white birch Covered in the snow dust; It’s so beautiful it hurts. It’s a winter wonderland outside the window. She don’t even try to understand which way the wind blow. Heart and soul rest inside a pegasis nest. Got a sweater on her chest; Truly blessed to be. Smells of aniseed, sweeter than a honeybee, Sunny as the summer, even funny like a comedy. Nothing wrong with me; she can take my all-of-me. Lucky just to witness misses: This is Liquorice Tea.
The dark grey pegasus let her mane fall, messy and sweet smelling, over her shoulders, leaving them warm against the glass window, glittering with ice. Outside, snow drifted down in thick, sticky flakes, frosting the houses until they looked like a gingerbread village. In front of her, an old book, dog-eared and worn, was propped on a green pillow with a cup of her namesake tea perfuming the air. A record spun on the phonograph; it’s familiar melody a reminder that this season was full of friends and memories. There was much to do before Hearth’s Warming arrived, but, for the evening, she had time to relax under the snowy stars.
Frost curling on the windowpane, Like a fern leaf flickers in the fireplace flame. It’s the same dang everyday Neighborhood, Fade away- the background painting while she Lays in her duvet; Splayed out in her comforter, Pillow under her. Hair down, don’t care, Pair of favourite underwear, Bowl of baby carrots and celery stick. This mare was made to cherish. So incredible, it’s Like a picture in a story book, catching a glimpse. Her little smile when she grabs her cup, taking a sip, And makes her glasses fog up. Tears my heart up. Wings like a starling- Shimmer like they’re stardust. On the wall clock ticking seconds away. Yesterday slipping, and tomorrow’s today. Holiday flavour, Neighborhood: savour everything Friends call her Licky. This is Liquorice Tea.