Uploaded July 2026 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago

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Tortalieo will experience 7 heart attacks and 1 seizure... before he even clicks start... #bummer #bummerwar #bummersaga #tortalieo



Future historians will hate this, just like how Carlan will hate the description if I don't make it fun somehow. So here are my top favorite somethings



Plastic cups

computer mouses

portable stoves

Claude Monet-Japanese Bridge Painting

pi


And now 5 least favorite somethings


People

The FDA

Yunobo

Mayonnaise

Biodegradable Straws


Now Imma send the last 5 used emojis 💥🔒💣👍👎






QUICK!!! STARING CONTEST GO! 👁️👁️






*blink* 🟡🟡


aww you win...

PAH!


anyway enjoy tortalieo, make sure to ask him lots of questions to make him confused and possibly worried.