Uploaded October 2025 | Updated September 2026, 1 week ago
There’s a simple formula we can apply to change almost any aspect of our lives. In this short video I explain what the formula is, why it works, and some common mistakes that get in the way.
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Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
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I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
You can follow me here:
🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0
🌍 forresthanson.com
📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
There’s a simple formula we can apply to change almost any aspect of our lives. In this short video I explain what the formula is, why it works, and some common mistakes that get in the way.
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
Subscribe to Rick on YouTube: youtube.com/@RickHanson?sub_confirmation=1
Get Rick's Free Newsletters: rickhanson.com/writings/newsletters-from-dr-rick-hanson
Follow Rick Here:
🌍 rickhanson.com
📸 instagram.com/rickhansonphd
I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
You can follow me here:
🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0
🌍 forresthanson.com
📸 instagram.com/f.hanson


![Family Systems Theory: The Invisible Force That Runs Your Relationships | Being Well
Have you ever walked back into your parents house and suddenly felt like youd downloaded an old version of yourself? In today’s episode, @RickHanson and I explain why through one of the most influential frameworks in psychology: Family Systems Theory (FST).
FST argues that hidden rules govern the behavior of the groups we’re a part of, and when you know the rules it’s easier to see them in action. Rick and I explore how systems replicate patterns of behavior, place people into specific roles, and manage anxiety through shifting alliances. We focus on how we can become differentiated by building a stronger sense of self. Topics include balancing closeness and distance, triangulation, specific roles like the “golden child,” FST’s non-pathologizing stance, the intergenerational transmission of patterns, and building strong relationships outside the system.
This episode includes references to self-harm.
Key Topics:
0:00 Intro
2:19 What’s Family Systems Theory?
12:01 Overview of important concepts in FST
18:50 Family roles
25:19 How anxiety moves through a family system
34:40 [Sponsor] Huel
36:42 The “identified patient”
46:51 Balancing compassion, agency, and responsibility
51:11 How healthy differentiation can disrupt a system
57:48 How to become more differentiated
1:11:33 Recap
Im not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
Sponsors
Grab Huel today with my exclusive offer of 15% OFF online with my code BEINGWELL at https://huel.com/beingwell. New customers only. Thank you to Huel for partnering and supporting our show!
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: Im Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (https://amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (https://apple.co/38ufGG0). Im making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
Subscribe to Rick on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@RickHanson?sub_confirmation=1
Get Ricks Free Newsletters: https://rickhanson.com/writings/newsletters-from-dr-rick-hanson/
Follow Rick Here:
🌍 https://rickhanson.com/
📸 https://www.instagram.com/rickhansonphd
You can follow me here:
🎤 https://apple.co/38ufGG0
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📸 https://www.instagram.com/f.hanson Family Systems Theory: The Invisible Force That Runs Your Relationships | Being Well](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/sexERIp8btU/mqdefault.jpg)







![Why Does Everyone Have ADHD Now?: February Mailbag
@RickHanson and I answer listener questions about the freeze state, ADHD, and power imbalances in relationships. First, we talk about how to deal with feelings of shame associated with the freeze state, emphasizing how we can “be with” in order to “work with.” Then we tackle a tricky question about how psychoeducation can complicate relationships. Next up, we discuss whether rates of ADHD have actually increased, and the differences between “real” ADHD vs. symptoms of screen addiction. Finally, we talk about how to think about the right fit with a therapist.
Key Topics:
0:00 Introduction
1:17 Question 1: Shame and the freeze state
19:24 [Sponsor] Zocdoc
20:46 Question 2: “My partner’s lack of psychoeducation is frustrating me!”
36:16 Question 3: “Why does everyone have ADHD?”
48:49 Question 4: “What’s the right amount of directness in therapy?”
58:46 Recap
Im not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
Sponsors:
Go to https://Zocdoc.com/BEINGWELL to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today.
Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://shopify.com/beingwell.
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: Im Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (https://amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (https://apple.co/38ufGG0). Im making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
Subscribe to Rick on YouTube: http://youtube.com/@RickHanson?sub_confirmation=1
Get Ricks Free Newsletters: https://rickhanson.com/writings/newsletters-from-dr-rick-hanson/
Follow Rick Here:
🌍 https://rickhanson.com/
📸 https://www.instagram.com/rickhansonphd
You can follow me here:
🎤 https://apple.co/38ufGG0
🌍 https://www.forresthanson.com
📸 https://www.instagram.com/f.hanson Why Does Everyone Have ADHD Now?: February Mailbag](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uxTLMzYJl6c/mqdefault.jpg)