Uploaded July 2015 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago

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You can support my work on Patreon! ^_^
patreon.com/Harry101UK

Free Rap + Instrumental Download:
dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/16065019/sfm/portal/200k/others/Harry%20Callaghan%20-%20The%20Wheatley%20Rap.zip

[UPDATED] Now available on iTunes too!

Or support me on Bandcamp if you want: =)
harrycallaghan.bandcamp.com/album/the-wheatley-rap

Wow, 250,000 subscribers and counting! Thank you all so much for the support! ^_^

This is the little Portal 'rap' (if you can call it that) video I promised last year when I hit 100,000 subscribers. Originally planned to finish and release it by 150,000 subscribers, but tons of projects popped up that took up my time. How time flies! Not the best 'rap' ever, but it was pretty fun to make. =P

All music, voices and animation by yours truly.

If you enjoyed this, please hit 'Like', Share, and 'Subscribe' for more! It really helps! ^_^

This took about 2 months of work; spread out over about 6 months, which was slowed down because of a lot of other large projects.

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My other Portal songs you may enjoy!

This Is Aperture
youtube.com/watch?v=JZIVmKOdrBk

Carol Of The Turrets
youtube.com/watch?v=J0NXY89WsxY

If I Were A Core
youtube.com/watch?v=4U_RvUYINpo

The Wheatley Song
youtube.com/watch?v=Di2wDDwxqHg

Defective:
youtube.com/watch?v=U_0BapT0mOQ

The Pit Song:
youtube.com/watch?v=2QO40HjRH2w

Making Science
youtube.com/watch?v=HDAFivGsKX4

GLaDOS Is To Blame
youtube.com/watch?v=qDY-DF4Lpdg

Dumb Ways To Die
youtube.com/watch?v=-SSdTXNK2mo

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Lyrics:

Hey my name's Wheatley; I'm a brilliant little core!
I didn't know what to expect when I opened up that door!
I showed her where the gun was; she progressed like a pro!
Such a good jumper too...
(Trust me, I know!)

When we found GLaDOS, I kinda woke her up!
She wasn't happy, nooo... she crushed me like a cup!
Found a great big bird; it put me on my rail!
When I found Chell again, I tried to tell her the tale!
(But!)

That little moron couldn't handle it!
He gained some power and lost his shit!
He turned GLaDOS into a potato-chip!
And now he's banished into space, without a ship!

We went behind the scenes to try and escape!
She tried to crush us again: got through without a scrape!
Destroyed her neurotoxin and replaced all the turrets!
Turns out they're pretty useless without any bullets!

We made it to her chamber; I was ready to insert!
Then Chell pressed the button...oooh, man that hurt!
I did lose control, I'll be the first to admit...
I even punched Chell down a deadly pit...

That little moron couldn't handle it!
He gained some power and lost his shit!
He turned GLaDOS into a potato-chip!
And now he's banished into space, without a ship!

With GLaDOS out the picture, I could call the shots!
Did a little digging and came across the bots!
Had a real bad itch and needed to do some tests!
But first I had to deal with those troublesome pests!

Chell and the potato, made it to my lair!
I only tried to help them; it just wasn't fair!
Then Chell shot a portal on to the moon!
And it sucked us out like a big typhoon!

That little moron couldn't handle it!
He gained some power and lost his shit!
He turned GLaDOS into a potato-chip!
And now he's banished into space, without a ship!

Spaaaaace!

Spaaaaaaaaaaaace!

Spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace!

Space!
Space!
Space!
Space!
Space!
Space!
Space!

[x4]
That little moron couldn't handle it!
He gained some power and lost his shit!
He turned GLaDOS into a potato-chip!
And now he's banished into space, without a ship!

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Animation | Music | Editing | Voices | Lyrics |
Harry Callaghan

Custom Turret / Core Rigs
August 'Rantis' Loolam

HWM Chell Model
Maxxy

Software Used:
Animation - Source Filmmaker
Editing - Adobe Premiere Pro CS6 , Adobe After Effects CS6 , Adobe Photoshop CS6
Music - Reason 8

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twitter.com/Harry101UK

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