Jeff Hijlkema | of Kings & Queens // Judges Feedback Revision // April 2024 Composing Competition @jeffhijlkema | Uploaded May 2024 | Updated October 2024, 16 hours ago.
Wednesday the 8th of May there was this YouTube livestream event on the Ryan Leach Composing Competition channel, where three judges, (musicians & composers in the field) gave their feedback on the 12 finalists submissions in the Ryan Leach April 2024 composing competition. With my piece ‘of Kings & Queens’ I was one of the finalists.
This is a link to my original entry:
youtube.com/watch?v=1P_0QZd51I4
You can watch the full livestream through this link:
youtube.com/watch?v=KnFpzt5ucEA&t=835s
My work didn’t make it to the final winners. After hearing the feedback of the judges, specially the feedback on what could be improved, I thought of revisiting my composition to process this feedback, making a 2nd version, next to it.
This is the feedback I took into account:
- The main theme loses it’s power and attraction in the second climax (at 1:09). Nothing really new is introduced there but the choir on top.
- The main theme in the second climax could use some counterpart in the middle voices.
This is what I changed:
I brought back the first climax (0:50) to smaller proportions, in order to not give away too much there already, just proper introduction of the main theme by the full strings, with a added solo flute on top of it, just very softly, for color. The piano is still playing along, but in the background, just like the harp and celeste. So, in that first climax I took away the deep pizz bass, sine wave bass, timpani and some orchestral efx (to only bring it all back in the 2nd climax). The 1st violins are now playing the maintheme one octave lower, together with the 2nd violins, for a full unisono sound. In the second climax the 1st violins are playing the main theme one octave higher, lifting things up.
In the second climax (1:09) I introduced some counterlines in the 2nd violins, doubled by the choir altos. All together they are pulling away some attention from the main theme here and there, adding a little more movement also.
In fact all pretty subtle changes, if you compare it to the original. Though I wonder what version you like best?
Be well,
Jeff
Wednesday the 8th of May there was this YouTube livestream event on the Ryan Leach Composing Competition channel, where three judges, (musicians & composers in the field) gave their feedback on the 12 finalists submissions in the Ryan Leach April 2024 composing competition. With my piece ‘of Kings & Queens’ I was one of the finalists.
This is a link to my original entry:
youtube.com/watch?v=1P_0QZd51I4
You can watch the full livestream through this link:
youtube.com/watch?v=KnFpzt5ucEA&t=835s
My work didn’t make it to the final winners. After hearing the feedback of the judges, specially the feedback on what could be improved, I thought of revisiting my composition to process this feedback, making a 2nd version, next to it.
This is the feedback I took into account:
- The main theme loses it’s power and attraction in the second climax (at 1:09). Nothing really new is introduced there but the choir on top.
- The main theme in the second climax could use some counterpart in the middle voices.
This is what I changed:
I brought back the first climax (0:50) to smaller proportions, in order to not give away too much there already, just proper introduction of the main theme by the full strings, with a added solo flute on top of it, just very softly, for color. The piano is still playing along, but in the background, just like the harp and celeste. So, in that first climax I took away the deep pizz bass, sine wave bass, timpani and some orchestral efx (to only bring it all back in the 2nd climax). The 1st violins are now playing the maintheme one octave lower, together with the 2nd violins, for a full unisono sound. In the second climax the 1st violins are playing the main theme one octave higher, lifting things up.
In the second climax (1:09) I introduced some counterlines in the 2nd violins, doubled by the choir altos. All together they are pulling away some attention from the main theme here and there, adding a little more movement also.
In fact all pretty subtle changes, if you compare it to the original. Though I wonder what version you like best?
Be well,
Jeff
