Uploaded January 2026 | Updated September 2026, 7 minutes ago
The split-screen version of this session is available for Tier 2 channel members and at the shop, along with the other PD Project material: shop.mndflds.com/products
Become a member here: youtube.com/borderlinernotes/join
**This is a consultation/conversation. The two participants are not in therapy together and there is no patient-doctor relationship.**
Psych Interview / First meeting between Tessa (dx'd with NPD) and expert clinician Dr. Karen Jacob. Tessa has never had a female therapist, and issues of trauma around women surface when she's faced with Karen. Themes include dysregulated self-esteem, image-management, humiliation, fear of judgment, hatred of a "past self," controlling social interactions, using people for selfies and "coolness," fear of being ordinary, loneliness, struggling for connection.
0:00 Intro / Healing from Trauma
3:02 Shutting Down / Struggling to Label Feelings / Avoiding her Diagnosis
6:35 Trauma with Women / Competition / Fear of Judgment
15:03 Struggling to Want Connection / Fear of Being a Fraud / Using People for Selfies
17:33 Safety Strategies / Waiting Until People Adore Her First or Shutting Them out
23:33 Her "Worthless" Past Self / Reliving What She Never Got / Trauma of Being Unnoticed
27:12 Ordinary & Together vs Extraordinary & Alone
30:07 Boredom / Loneliness / Breakdown of Self / Going to Therapy
32:35 Disappointment in People / People Are Going to Fail You
36:25 Struggling for Human Connection / Needing Evidence to Change
40:35 Dysregulated Self-Esteem / Tessa's Self-Defense
46:07 Wrapping Up / Having a Female Therapist / Trust Issues
Dr. Jacob’s book “The Feelings Toolbox” will be out soon — you can pre-order it on her site: no-quam.com/. The Feelings Toolbox is a social–emotional learning system that helps young children (ages 3–7) understand, express, and regulate their emotions through story, science, and play. Karen L. Jacob, PhD is a Program Director at McLean Hospital and Assistant Professor at Harvard Medical School. "The Feelings Toolbox" project brings the rigor of evidence-based psychotherapy into the language of childhood. It includes a beautifully illustrated storybook - with two playful characters who learn that all feelings are normal and meaningful - plus a set of tangible, sensory-based regulation tools, and a 12-week curriculum designed for both classrooms and families.
Disclaimer: "Please be advised this video may contain sensitive information. All content found within this publication (VIDEO) is provided for informational purposes only. All cases may differ, and the information provided is a general guide. The content is not intended to be used as a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have specific questions about a medical condition, you should consult your doctor or other qualified medical professional for assistance or questions you have regarding a medical condition. Studio Comma The, LLC and BorderlinerNotes does not recommend any specific course of medical remedy, physicians, products, opinion, or other information. Studio Comma The, LLC and BorderlinerNotes expressly disclaims responsibility and shall have no liability whatsoever for any damages, loss, injury, or suffering as a result of reliance on the information in this publication."
If you or someone you know is considering self-harm or suicide, it’s okay to ask for help. 24 hour support is provided by hopeline-nc.org (877.235.4525), suicidepreventionlifeline.org (800.273.8255), kidshelpphone.ca (800.668.6868).
The split-screen version of this session is available for Tier 2 channel members and at the shop, along with the other PD Project material: shop.mndflds.com/products
Become a member here: youtube.com/borderlinernotes/join
**This is a consultation/conversation. The two participants are not in therapy together and there is no patient-doctor relationship.**
Psych Interview / First meeting between Tessa (dx'd with NPD) and expert clinician Dr. Karen Jacob. Tessa has never had a female therapist, and issues of trauma around women surface when she's faced with Karen. Themes include dysregulated self-esteem, image-management, humiliation, fear of judgment, hatred of a "past self," controlling social interactions, using people for selfies and "coolness," fear of being ordinary, loneliness, struggling for connection.
0:00 Intro / Healing from Trauma
3:02 Shutting Down / Struggling to Label Feelings / Avoiding her Diagnosis
6:35 Trauma with Women / Competition / Fear of Judgment
15:03 Struggling to Want Connection / Fear of Being a Fraud / Using People for Selfies
17:33 Safety Strategies / Waiting Until People Adore Her First or Shutting Them out
23:33 Her "Worthless" Past Self / Reliving What She Never Got / Trauma of Being Unnoticed
27:12 Ordinary & Together vs Extraordinary & Alone
30:07 Boredom / Loneliness / Breakdown of Self / Going to Therapy
32:35 Disappointment in People / People Are Going to Fail You
36:25 Struggling for Human Connection / Needing Evidence to Change
40:35 Dysregulated Self-Esteem / Tessa's Self-Defense
46:07 Wrapping Up / Having a Female Therapist / Trust Issues
Dr. Jacob’s book “The Feelings Toolbox” will be out soon — you can pre-order it on her site: no-quam.com/. The Feelings Toolbox is a social–emotional learning system that helps young children (ages 3–7) understand, express, and regulate their emotions through story, science, and play. Karen L. Jacob, PhD is a Program Director at McLean Hospital and Assistant Professor at Harvard Medical School. "The Feelings Toolbox" project brings the rigor of evidence-based psychotherapy into the language of childhood. It includes a beautifully illustrated storybook - with two playful characters who learn that all feelings are normal and meaningful - plus a set of tangible, sensory-based regulation tools, and a 12-week curriculum designed for both classrooms and families.
Disclaimer: "Please be advised this video may contain sensitive information. All content found within this publication (VIDEO) is provided for informational purposes only. All cases may differ, and the information provided is a general guide. The content is not intended to be used as a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have specific questions about a medical condition, you should consult your doctor or other qualified medical professional for assistance or questions you have regarding a medical condition. Studio Comma The, LLC and BorderlinerNotes does not recommend any specific course of medical remedy, physicians, products, opinion, or other information. Studio Comma The, LLC and BorderlinerNotes expressly disclaims responsibility and shall have no liability whatsoever for any damages, loss, injury, or suffering as a result of reliance on the information in this publication."
If you or someone you know is considering self-harm or suicide, it’s okay to ask for help. 24 hour support is provided by hopeline-nc.org (877.235.4525), suicidepreventionlifeline.org (800.273.8255), kidshelpphone.ca (800.668.6868).
