Uploaded November 2020 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago
LOVES LOST HATRED
By P B Taylor
I
The crawling prejudice of everything
Of all that is real and unreal
And reluctant, a slightly hidden illusion
Comes to me at its wrong moment
Angry anguish and frosted frustration
To feel so lose and quarry so far
To cry pitifully and then to laugh
As I slowly sink and slip painlessly on
I hate having loved this way
Lingering love with vacant vigour
As its past confronts me again
When I least spy unexpected, or require it
II
And so, yes indeed, I grudgingly came
Through it all a spinning wheel of life
Through the rolling years I had loved
And down those months I rigid rolled
To find you again so different now and nice
To share you so real so unhidden
But that time pressed on so fast and furious
Post single ecstasy and double passing moments
Then they reach to us the end
Its inevitable reckoning and its silent answer
That white and red of passion and humility
Sullenly proud faintly fair always unswerving
That is how I see you now
As I, at last arrive.
London 1983
Phillip Taylor MBE was born in Amersham and educated at London University and the Inns of Court School of Law. His working life was spent, firstly at the BBC in London, in the Ministry of Defence and the Army, and then as a barrister at law and mediator at Lincoln’s Inn after he was called to the Bar.
He was Chairman of the Society of Civil Service Authors Poetry Workshop from 1982 to 1986 and contributed to their annual anthology FOCUS. His poems and short stories have appeared in journals, magazines and newsletters and some have been broadcast by the BBC. He has produced several poetry collections since 1972.
The Poetry Workshop was founded by Bill Barnes in 1970. It was a part of the Society of Civil Service Authors (founded in 1935) which now known as the Society of Civil and Public Service Writers.
LOVES LOST HATRED
By P B Taylor
I
The crawling prejudice of everything
Of all that is real and unreal
And reluctant, a slightly hidden illusion
Comes to me at its wrong moment
Angry anguish and frosted frustration
To feel so lose and quarry so far
To cry pitifully and then to laugh
As I slowly sink and slip painlessly on
I hate having loved this way
Lingering love with vacant vigour
As its past confronts me again
When I least spy unexpected, or require it
II
And so, yes indeed, I grudgingly came
Through it all a spinning wheel of life
Through the rolling years I had loved
And down those months I rigid rolled
To find you again so different now and nice
To share you so real so unhidden
But that time pressed on so fast and furious
Post single ecstasy and double passing moments
Then they reach to us the end
Its inevitable reckoning and its silent answer
That white and red of passion and humility
Sullenly proud faintly fair always unswerving
That is how I see you now
As I, at last arrive.
London 1983
Phillip Taylor MBE was born in Amersham and educated at London University and the Inns of Court School of Law. His working life was spent, firstly at the BBC in London, in the Ministry of Defence and the Army, and then as a barrister at law and mediator at Lincoln’s Inn after he was called to the Bar.
He was Chairman of the Society of Civil Service Authors Poetry Workshop from 1982 to 1986 and contributed to their annual anthology FOCUS. His poems and short stories have appeared in journals, magazines and newsletters and some have been broadcast by the BBC. He has produced several poetry collections since 1972.
The Poetry Workshop was founded by Bill Barnes in 1970. It was a part of the Society of Civil Service Authors (founded in 1935) which now known as the Society of Civil and Public Service Writers.
