Uploaded May 2024 | Updated September 2026, 1 hour ago
it is the next day, i have had time to think. and instead of making a new piece, i have decided to use one of my very first. at times it is not well mixed and may sound low quality but i cant represent my current emotion in any other song than this or some random shit i find online.
i will not have my peace (among loss), the thought of fumbling something on such a scale is quite frankly horrifying to me. i hate having a physical form which can make mistakes, i dont wish to be a human. i never asked for this, but as we all do i made the best of my life for as long as i could. at times it has seemed hard and last night was certainly one of those times, even thought it was a low quality video that i had deleted. i did not have a backup or the ability to open the original file cause fruitloop fuckery expects me to pay 100 american dollars to their shitshow just for one singlular addon.
im like actually fucken done after this i cant do music on fruitloop anymore. i cant handle the pressure of not fucking something up as simple as leaving the tab untouched for too long (causes some glitch where i cant hear anything that plays and have to restart fl) or accidentally deleting the tab without saving, which brings me to why i dont just save. as you may or may not know, if you do not own an addon in fl studio, you cant open the save. so every single song i make has to be made in one take with no down time (im referring to downtime not as a break. i can take a break whenever i want, rather, a time when i can think about the project and not worry immensely)
all my music in fl studio, finished or not, was comprised out of physical and mental suffering. my first uploaded piece was created in a single sleep deprived night when i was in a horrible mental state. my final piece was created in a time of doubt, and the few lyrics i had written described a premonition. a premonition that something in the near future would go horribly wrong, this was my premonition.
i quit music on fl studio i cant take this shit anymore.
i hope you enjoy the like 3 songs i did upload but im done with that shit.
im going to touch up on all that genius lyrics shit, thats it.
probably not gonna upload at ALL for like months cause im just so done
but hey i cant see into the future maybe ill get some random spark of bullfuckery motivation that will lift me back into fl studio to finish or whatever.
it went from pain to fun back to pain. this whole process has just sucked so much for me and i never should have written anything after my first song.
goodbye random people on the internet, for now.
project link
onlinesequencer.net/3781705
my online sequencer account
onlinesequencer.net/members/135572
my genius account
genius.com/cosmix_toast
it is the next day, i have had time to think. and instead of making a new piece, i have decided to use one of my very first. at times it is not well mixed and may sound low quality but i cant represent my current emotion in any other song than this or some random shit i find online.
i will not have my peace (among loss), the thought of fumbling something on such a scale is quite frankly horrifying to me. i hate having a physical form which can make mistakes, i dont wish to be a human. i never asked for this, but as we all do i made the best of my life for as long as i could. at times it has seemed hard and last night was certainly one of those times, even thought it was a low quality video that i had deleted. i did not have a backup or the ability to open the original file cause fruitloop fuckery expects me to pay 100 american dollars to their shitshow just for one singlular addon.
im like actually fucken done after this i cant do music on fruitloop anymore. i cant handle the pressure of not fucking something up as simple as leaving the tab untouched for too long (causes some glitch where i cant hear anything that plays and have to restart fl) or accidentally deleting the tab without saving, which brings me to why i dont just save. as you may or may not know, if you do not own an addon in fl studio, you cant open the save. so every single song i make has to be made in one take with no down time (im referring to downtime not as a break. i can take a break whenever i want, rather, a time when i can think about the project and not worry immensely)
all my music in fl studio, finished or not, was comprised out of physical and mental suffering. my first uploaded piece was created in a single sleep deprived night when i was in a horrible mental state. my final piece was created in a time of doubt, and the few lyrics i had written described a premonition. a premonition that something in the near future would go horribly wrong, this was my premonition.
i quit music on fl studio i cant take this shit anymore.
i hope you enjoy the like 3 songs i did upload but im done with that shit.
im going to touch up on all that genius lyrics shit, thats it.
probably not gonna upload at ALL for like months cause im just so done
but hey i cant see into the future maybe ill get some random spark of bullfuckery motivation that will lift me back into fl studio to finish or whatever.
it went from pain to fun back to pain. this whole process has just sucked so much for me and i never should have written anything after my first song.
goodbye random people on the internet, for now.
project link
onlinesequencer.net/3781705
my online sequencer account
onlinesequencer.net/members/135572
my genius account
genius.com/cosmix_toast
