Uploaded February 2010 | Updated September 2026, 1 hour ago
Sorry everyone, but my computer is worse that previously expected. It still isn't working properly and the IT people have had to take it in again.
As a consolation prize, I give you this video of my brother performing his comedic song 'I'm Your Stalker', at the open mic night held on Wednesday 10th February, at the Jolly Brewer pub.
= LYRICS =
I'm your stalker,
I'm hiding in the bushes,
you left your curtains open...
I just watch ya,
as you're moving through your house
and pick up your telephone,
its me who answers,
you've heard my voice before,
you're starting to get frightened,
you put the phone down and start to call the police,
I'd better scarper,
but I'll be back,
yes I'll be back,
cos' I'm your stalker...
I'm like the night,
you will never be rid of me...
I'm out of sight,
I'll come down on you so easily..,.
I don't care how big your boyfriend is,
he'll never catch me...
cos' I am, I am your stalker...
Your hair smells like fruit,
and your favourite is minestone,
and one by one, you crack your knuckles,
when you are felling lonely,
your favourite song is, on my iPod,
I listen to it when you're having sex,
with that bastard,
that fucking asshole,
he's such a phony...
I'm like the night,
you will never be rid of me...
I'm out of sight,
I'll come down on you so easily..,.
I don't care how big your boyfriend is,
he'll never catch me...
cos' I am, I am your stalker...
And when, you think it safe to roam,
when you think you're all alone,
I promise you my dear, I will succeed,
cos' you're my queen, I have to have you,
in my own way...
I follow you down, an empty alleyway,
its going exactly as I planned,
I creep behind you, completely silent,
a chloroform-soaked rag in hand,
He doesn't love you, the way that I do,
I'm gonna make you love too,
this is it now, so close to you,
but you do something I don't expect,
You stop dead and,
you turn to face me,
I see your blueish greenish eyes,
your mouth opens, you inhale,
then you just scream, 'Now!'
And in a flash,
I am blinded by a floodlight,
two men attack,
I am wrestled too the ground,
I'm beaten, restrained and unmasked,
I can't believe it,
You have caught, you've caught your stalker,
I cannot fight,
you came down on me so easily,
I'm in plain sight,
this is finally how we meet,
I must admit I'm a bit aroused, but also sad that,
I am no longer your stalker...
Sorry everyone, but my computer is worse that previously expected. It still isn't working properly and the IT people have had to take it in again.
As a consolation prize, I give you this video of my brother performing his comedic song 'I'm Your Stalker', at the open mic night held on Wednesday 10th February, at the Jolly Brewer pub.
= LYRICS =
I'm your stalker,
I'm hiding in the bushes,
you left your curtains open...
I just watch ya,
as you're moving through your house
and pick up your telephone,
its me who answers,
you've heard my voice before,
you're starting to get frightened,
you put the phone down and start to call the police,
I'd better scarper,
but I'll be back,
yes I'll be back,
cos' I'm your stalker...
I'm like the night,
you will never be rid of me...
I'm out of sight,
I'll come down on you so easily..,.
I don't care how big your boyfriend is,
he'll never catch me...
cos' I am, I am your stalker...
Your hair smells like fruit,
and your favourite is minestone,
and one by one, you crack your knuckles,
when you are felling lonely,
your favourite song is, on my iPod,
I listen to it when you're having sex,
with that bastard,
that fucking asshole,
he's such a phony...
I'm like the night,
you will never be rid of me...
I'm out of sight,
I'll come down on you so easily..,.
I don't care how big your boyfriend is,
he'll never catch me...
cos' I am, I am your stalker...
And when, you think it safe to roam,
when you think you're all alone,
I promise you my dear, I will succeed,
cos' you're my queen, I have to have you,
in my own way...
I follow you down, an empty alleyway,
its going exactly as I planned,
I creep behind you, completely silent,
a chloroform-soaked rag in hand,
He doesn't love you, the way that I do,
I'm gonna make you love too,
this is it now, so close to you,
but you do something I don't expect,
You stop dead and,
you turn to face me,
I see your blueish greenish eyes,
your mouth opens, you inhale,
then you just scream, 'Now!'
And in a flash,
I am blinded by a floodlight,
two men attack,
I am wrestled too the ground,
I'm beaten, restrained and unmasked,
I can't believe it,
You have caught, you've caught your stalker,
I cannot fight,
you came down on me so easily,
I'm in plain sight,
this is finally how we meet,
I must admit I'm a bit aroused, but also sad that,
I am no longer your stalker...
