Uploaded June 2026 | Updated September 2026, 3 weeks ago
Most of us are pretty bad at conflict, usually because we weren’t taught how to handle it well. But healthy conflict can be one of the best ways to deepen intimacy and trust. In this episode Dr. Rick and I discuss why conflict is so difficult, the models of conflict we inherit from childhood, healthy repair, what emotional flooding does to the brain and body during a fight, and the research on what actually predicts relationship success. We close with a handful of things that get mistaken for repair but aren't, including submission, thin apologies, and just solving the surface problem.
Key Topics:
0:00 Intro
2:51 Repair as the biggest predictor of relationship success
5:03 Models of conflict and where they originate from
15:50 What is healthy repair, and why is it so hard?
24:32 What to do about emotional flooding
29:37 [Sponsor] Rula
31:18 When to let things go, and when to address them
40:07 What repair is and what it's not
48:37 The power of authentic apologies
59:01 Recap
Sponsors:
Visit Rula.com/BEINGWELL to find affordable, high-quality therapy that’s actually covered by insurance.
I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
Subscribe to Rick on YouTube: youtube.com/@RickHanson?sub_confirmation=1
Get Rick's Free Newsletters: rickhanson.com/writings/newsletters-from-dr-rick-hanson
Follow Rick Here:
🌍 rickhanson.com
📸 instagram.com/rickhansonphd
You can follow me here:
🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0
🌍 forresthanson.com
📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Most of us are pretty bad at conflict, usually because we weren’t taught how to handle it well. But healthy conflict can be one of the best ways to deepen intimacy and trust. In this episode Dr. Rick and I discuss why conflict is so difficult, the models of conflict we inherit from childhood, healthy repair, what emotional flooding does to the brain and body during a fight, and the research on what actually predicts relationship success. We close with a handful of things that get mistaken for repair but aren't, including submission, thin apologies, and just solving the surface problem.
Key Topics:
0:00 Intro
2:51 Repair as the biggest predictor of relationship success
5:03 Models of conflict and where they originate from
15:50 What is healthy repair, and why is it so hard?
24:32 What to do about emotional flooding
29:37 [Sponsor] Rula
31:18 When to let things go, and when to address them
40:07 What repair is and what it's not
48:37 The power of authentic apologies
59:01 Recap
Sponsors:
Visit Rula.com/BEINGWELL to find affordable, high-quality therapy that’s actually covered by insurance.
I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.
Subscribe to Being Well on:
Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936
Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ
Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
Subscribe to Rick on YouTube: youtube.com/@RickHanson?sub_confirmation=1
Get Rick's Free Newsletters: rickhanson.com/writings/newsletters-from-dr-rick-hanson
Follow Rick Here:
🌍 rickhanson.com
📸 instagram.com/rickhansonphd
You can follow me here:
🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0
🌍 forresthanson.com
📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
