Uploaded December 2025 | Updated September 2026, 1 week ago

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Glitch TRACKS! I'm not a glitch! ...probably?
twitter.com/yuugijoou
discord.gg/bKT9pRW

(I've been called OTHER things that rhyme, but that's neither here nor there.)

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I'm actually pretty shocked this game is still getting content updates. Especially given the pretty definitive "there won't be any more updates" update. Which was. Forever ago?

Don't get me wrong, I love this game and what it represents.

I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with it as a completionist of a very marginal degree. So ignoring that and just accepting the rest really is the healthiest choice thereafter.

But the most intriguing part about this, in spite of its reverence and repurposing of the original tracks... is the creation of these bizarre mashups.

I just wish they were easier to see.

Seriously, they pop in for about a minute of matchmaking opportunities... if you're there, you're there. If you're not... oh well?

I get the whole "yeah, the game has secret tracks" as kind of a weird urban legend word of mouth weirdness having its own appeal and all... but... it's simultaneously too simple and too complicated to be waved away as "it'll happen eventually!"

But then you can apparently just determine all the appearances algorithmically and know what precise minute of which days they'll occur. Neat.

(You can do this with the contents of Mini Grand Prix, too, apparently! Which you'll "need" to do if you want to avoid just spinning your wheels and waiting for tracks to show up, particularly Classic variants of certain tracks.)

Meanwhile, the also-totally-fabricated-for-this-game Mirror variants get all the love. Proper GP. Tons of schedule bloat. Thank GOODNESS it's all on an automated timer.

If you've got time and energy to babysit that. "Not now! I gotta go catch the Ace League Mirror rerun! I can eat or sleep later!"

You can absolutely bet that there's gonig to be an uptick in attendance and overwhelming vote for the track in question, though.

But enough about that, we've got elusive racetracks to visit!

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???

Too bad about the names, huh? It'd be nice if they had any kind of official nomenclature behind them.

This one mashes up features of Sand Ocean with Port Town.

If I'm being honest, I didn't originally much care for the foundational concepts of Port Town... but this feels fairly reasonable as a knee-jerk reaction to a track that's essentially the gut check of the original game and the only standalone accessible track from the King League at all outside of Grand Prix when it comes to Port Town II... it can start to feel like it's from a totally different game from the rest.

NOW, however, especially after having had the chance to drive a wider version for more players, I've looked back more fondly on the intent and design principles behind Port Town and it's one of my favorites from the original game. (Also the song got stuck in my head against my wishes. That's probably at least partly to blame.)

And then Sand Ocean... exists? It's a little too much "early game track" syndrome to stand out, and it was definitely neglected in its original context compared to the rest. Jamming the most notable features of Port Town II and Sand Ocean together in conjunction just feels a bit... incongruous. Not entirely satisfying.

The two songs mashed up really just results in "more Port Town"... which I will only performatively complain about, as I've been converted already. The rhythmic alteration and back beat alone is... not exactly enough to write home about, even if slightly interesting.

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???

This time we've got a fusion of elements from Silence and Sand Storm. MOSTLY Silence II, which if I'm being judgy, I find far less intrinsically interesting to race on than the original. The jump plates are an eye-catching spectacle, but they take a lot out of the actual course design and racing. They're so basic and toothless that the sandstorm doesn't pose any real threat either and the turns elsewhere are so tighly wound that you won't lose any real visibility. (Yes, I actually DID jump off the track and lose my GP clear on Silence II once, shush!)

I had no idea I needed this music mashup in my life before now, though. It has me on the edge of my seat with each changeover, even after I already know they're coming.

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???

For a track that's supposed to be a mixture of Big Blue and Red Canyon... I have to be honest, I don't really care for it much. Probably because it's a mixture of the fairly basic pieces of the original Big Blue and Red Canyon I, which really just results in a bit of a washed out, muddy mess.

I think it's mostly due to finding this one last, so the natural progression is weird if you find the easiest one after the more challening ones. Now, if it was built more from the II versions, we'd have something to talk about...

I'm also not a fan of the mirror tracks dabbling in using gold sparks as course item pickups, destabilizing the game's catchup mechanic as an impromptu track gimmick.