Uploaded May 2026 | Updated September 2026, 9 hours ago
The (51-minute-long) extended split-screen version of this conversation is available for Tier 2 channel members and at the shop, along with the other PD Project material: shop.mndflds.com/products
Become a member here: youtube.com/borderlinernotes/join
**This is a consultation/conversation. The two participants are not in therapy together and there is no patient-doctor relationship.**
Psych interview / first meeting between Tiffany (dx'd w/ BPD) and expert clinician Dr. Karen Jacob. Main themes include people-pleasing and loneliness, fear of judgment, a sense of badness, invalidation, the mismatch between a "high-functioning" exterior and persistent internal suffering, and the inability to let yourself be known and loved by yourself and others.
0:00 Intro / Setup / How This Can Be Most Helpful
2:49 Background Story: Not Fitting In / Toxic Relationships / Not Having Friends / No Sense of Self / Other-Focus / Getting BPD Diagnosis
10:28 Being Seen as "High-functioning" vs Feeling Persistent Distress
15:48 Feeling Judged / Fighting for Self-Worth
20:08 People-pleasing and Not Having Friends / Loneliness
24:00 Feeling Something is "Inherently Wrong" With Me
26:46 "High-Functioning" Outside Doesn't Match Internal Feeling
30:15 Self-Judgment / Hiding Yourself Makes Real Love Impossible
32:52 Suicidality, Feeling of Badness, Wrapping Up
Dr. Jacob’s book “The Feelings Toolbox” is available at no-quam.com
The Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: 988
For resources about BPD: https://gundersonpdi.mclean.harvard.edu/psychoeducational-resources/
If you or someone you know is considering self-harm or suicide, it’s okay to ask for help. 24 hour support is provided by hopeline-nc.org (877.235.4525), suicidepreventionlifeline.org (800.273.8255), kidshelpphone.ca (800.668.6868).
SAMHSA’s National Helpline:
If you or someone you know is dealing with substance misuse or mental illness, call 1-800-662-4357 for free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.
Disclaimer: "Please be advised this video may contain sensitive information. All content found within this publication (VIDEO) is provided for informational purposes only. All cases may differ, and the information provided is a general guide. The content is not intended to be used as a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have specific questions about a medical condition, you should consult your doctor or other qualified medical professional for assistance or questions you have regarding a medical condition. Studio Comma The, LLC and BorderlinerNotes does not recommend any specific course of medical remedy, physicians, products, opinion, or other information. Studio Comma The, LLC and BorderlinerNotes expressly disclaims responsibility and shall have no liability whatsoever for any damages, loss, injury, or suffering as a result of reliance on the information in this publication."
The (51-minute-long) extended split-screen version of this conversation is available for Tier 2 channel members and at the shop, along with the other PD Project material: shop.mndflds.com/products
Become a member here: youtube.com/borderlinernotes/join
**This is a consultation/conversation. The two participants are not in therapy together and there is no patient-doctor relationship.**
Psych interview / first meeting between Tiffany (dx'd w/ BPD) and expert clinician Dr. Karen Jacob. Main themes include people-pleasing and loneliness, fear of judgment, a sense of badness, invalidation, the mismatch between a "high-functioning" exterior and persistent internal suffering, and the inability to let yourself be known and loved by yourself and others.
0:00 Intro / Setup / How This Can Be Most Helpful
2:49 Background Story: Not Fitting In / Toxic Relationships / Not Having Friends / No Sense of Self / Other-Focus / Getting BPD Diagnosis
10:28 Being Seen as "High-functioning" vs Feeling Persistent Distress
15:48 Feeling Judged / Fighting for Self-Worth
20:08 People-pleasing and Not Having Friends / Loneliness
24:00 Feeling Something is "Inherently Wrong" With Me
26:46 "High-Functioning" Outside Doesn't Match Internal Feeling
30:15 Self-Judgment / Hiding Yourself Makes Real Love Impossible
32:52 Suicidality, Feeling of Badness, Wrapping Up
Dr. Jacob’s book “The Feelings Toolbox” is available at no-quam.com
The Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: 988
For resources about BPD: https://gundersonpdi.mclean.harvard.edu/psychoeducational-resources/
If you or someone you know is considering self-harm or suicide, it’s okay to ask for help. 24 hour support is provided by hopeline-nc.org (877.235.4525), suicidepreventionlifeline.org (800.273.8255), kidshelpphone.ca (800.668.6868).
SAMHSA’s National Helpline:
If you or someone you know is dealing with substance misuse or mental illness, call 1-800-662-4357 for free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.
Disclaimer: "Please be advised this video may contain sensitive information. All content found within this publication (VIDEO) is provided for informational purposes only. All cases may differ, and the information provided is a general guide. The content is not intended to be used as a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have specific questions about a medical condition, you should consult your doctor or other qualified medical professional for assistance or questions you have regarding a medical condition. Studio Comma The, LLC and BorderlinerNotes does not recommend any specific course of medical remedy, physicians, products, opinion, or other information. Studio Comma The, LLC and BorderlinerNotes expressly disclaims responsibility and shall have no liability whatsoever for any damages, loss, injury, or suffering as a result of reliance on the information in this publication."
