Uploaded June 2020 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago

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Spare time and a bad back makes me do silly things...

Lyrics:

I'm running out of time
Twitter's come to cancel my life
If I had a time machine
I'd change my past and make you my fan

Have no fear, my apology's here
My saddest face is telling you I must be sincere
I won't omegle you and watch you twerk
Unless I check you age first, so I'm not a jerk
I'm not a pedophile
I'm just kinda weird
And if you call me out then I'll shed a tear

'cause I'm erasing all my crimes
well they aren't really crimes
they're just the kind of slime you can't
buy, but with my sparkle style
I'll make you feel at ease
Now come sit on my knee and
Oh, you're not in danger
Oh, but I'll degrade ya
Oh, I'm kind of strange but
I'll still be loveable

Been fighting for the views all this time
I'll do what I've gotta do to make a dime
Is there nothing I can say to make you see
Blackface and child abuse was just funny
Maybe someone will save me
Someone like Jeffree Star
I kinda hope he snapchats killing James with his car...

But ow, why aren't you on my side?
What do I have to do
to make it clear to you that
I would never touch a child?
I just want to watch them dance
With one hand down my pants

Oh, you're not in danger
Oh, I'm not a stranger
Oh, I'm kinda strange but
I'll still be loveable.

But all I really need
Has been in front of me this whole time
Cheeto come and sit with me
We'll do things Ryland must never see
He'll never see

Chords: Am, C, G, F