deparTMent. everYBody! bLUe higHFalutin crysTAl's Way puREr, clOSe cIRculation abruPTly AUdit churcHGoers, ouTLaws, stePBrothers, BIrthmothers. rePOrt whATever keRNels, FRagments, scRAps, trACes THat'll imPArt sUpport noNProfessional PUrsuit: AMassing pyraCMonite, baBKinite, maCFallite, ESperite, aFMite, kuMDykolite... eNOugh, aLRight
peRForming colDBlooded tranSGressions, aBHorrent metHSessions, booMTown legenDS; eRGo epiCNess 'boUUT FLedgeling startUUP puLVerizing statUUS qUUOSKITLETS 8 (A-Rod, Tennis, Cop)BaratsAndBereta2013-07-25 | What happens when B&B have an idea that isn't meaty enough to warrant an entire sketch? ...A skitlet happens, that's what.
Episode Eight: -Party For A-Rod -How It Actually Went Down -Philosopher Cop
Thanks to: Max Kleinman, Eileen O'Connell, Allison Raskin, Alex Barbatsis, Brittany Cope and Aaron Massey.SEAL TEAM SUX Ep 4 (Barats and Bereta)BaratsAndBereta2013-07-18 | Suggest future characters in the comments!
Special thanks to Jeff Rosick for his work on the music: http://www.jeffrosickmusic.comSEAL TEAM SUX Ep 3 (Barats and Bereta)BaratsAndBereta2013-06-25 | ...SEAL TEAM SUX Ep 2 (Barats and Bereta)BaratsAndBereta2013-06-17 | Suggest characters for next episode in the comments!
Big thanks to Jeff Rosick for his work on the music: http://www.jeffrosickmusic.comRhett and Links YouTube Challenge Challenge (Barats and Bereta)BaratsAndBereta2013-05-22 | Rhett and Link tricked us (and also a bunch of other YouTubers) into braving a gauntlet of YouTube challenges back-to-back, and this is some of the resulting footage from our participation in the YouTube Challenge Challenge.
Highlights from the event not caught on tape: -After pretending to hate the baby food, Joe proceeded to eat the rest of the jar -Luke touched Tay Zonday -Joe touched Tay Zonday elsewhere and was arrested as a result -Luke broke Joe out of prison via tunnel and plastic explosives -Joe and Luke both flew the sweet-ass helicopter in the background without any training or permission whatsoever -All of the bullet points above were fabricated
Proper vids coming very, very soon! As always, thanks for watching.Alt Endings: Se7enBaratsAndBereta2013-03-19 | Did you know there were multiple endings to Se7en? Welp, it's true. EXTENDED CUT of this vid at NextMovie.com: http://tinyurl.com/cobsvr2
Special thanks to Brittany Cope and Alexandra Hensley for their help!
Music from jewelbeat.com Thanks to Nintendo for the free WiiUMaybe Ill Vote This YearBaratsAndBereta2012-10-15 | A music vid Luke directed for the fantastic people at http://lostmoonradio.com (Keep an eye out for the B&B cameo!)
Maybe register to vote? http://registertovote.orgBoston Jury DutyBaratsAndBereta2012-04-23 | A buncha Sox fans try to weasel out of jury duty so they can watch the World Series, kid.
Music from jewelbeat.comLUMBERJACKSBaratsAndBereta2012-02-08 | The last thing the offender SAW after attAXing the young girl, was a group of young men...
Heroic men sworn never to stop FOR REST, until the city was safe from TREEson and evil.
And as he LUMBERed away on bloody STUMPS the criminal promised himself he WOOD never return. People will bLOG of this day.
(Sorry for the reupload. The spelling error burned our insides and we had to fix it for sanity reasons.)
Music from jewelbeat.com &
neosounds.comHapi Berth DeyBaratsAndBereta2012-01-30 | Just a copyright-free little ditty about an Egyptian river god who finds a place to sleep atop two sheep and a deer named Harrison, who also happen to be governors of Algiers before the French conquest in 1830.
...and now that I think about it, "Harrison" might not be the right name for a deer. Go ahead and use discretion, name the deer whatever you'd like.
Barats and Bereta
A HUGE thanks to our lawyer buddy, Doug Lief, for his input on this.
Music from jewelbeat.comTarantulaBaratsAndBereta2011-12-26 | Sometimes in life you just have to take a break from making stupid sketches and make a stupid song about a giant, murderous tarantula.
THE JONES FAMILY WENT ON A ROAD TRIP EVERYTHING WAS GRAND ON THE ROAD TRIP 'TIL THE TARANTULA CAME AND ATE THEM ALL
THE COPS CAME TO GATHER CLUES THEY FOUND TARANTULA THEIR FUNERAL SERVICES GOT TARANTULA'D
THE WHITE HOUSE: TARANTULA'D THE ARMY: TARANTULA'D YAHWEH: TARANTULA'D THE MORAL IS TARANTULASKITLETS 7 (Genie, Bully, Hell)BaratsAndBereta2011-12-05 | What happens when B&B have an idea that isn't meaty enough to warrant an entire sketch? ...A skitlet happens, that's what.
Episode Seven:
-The Smartest Man In The World
-The Wussy Bully
-Garrett Punches His Ticket To Hell
With apologies to Cyanide & Happiness, who totally did the genie joke before us: http://explosm.net/comics/2243 ...we didn't know before we made the vid, now we do.
This week's unsolicited advice: stop eating so much junk food, kids.Great Pick-Up Lines in the BibleBaratsAndBereta2011-11-03 | How Biblical figures got to know women in the Biblical sense.
This week's advice: Follow your dreams and obey your thirst.Jack O LanternBaratsAndBereta2011-10-24 | Play this video in reverse and you'll hear The Beatles' White Album.
If you are reading this, good for you. You read the entire description.Mattress Sale!BaratsAndBereta2011-10-10 | All inventory must go! And it's all my fault!!! :D
Subscribe to us on Facebook and Like the heck out of us:
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Barats-and-Bereta-Productions/116995221685298?v...
http://apps.facebook.com/baratsandberetaOMG i PuT AN ENTIRE BaNANA In MY MOUF!!!!1!!BaratsAndBereta2011-09-06 | SUBSCRIBE TO MY CHANNEL B4 I DO SOMETHING UNSPEAKABLE TO SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!! ktnx
Free downloads are under Creative Commons License 3.0.
Must credit "Music from JewelBeat.com" or "Sound Effect from JewelBeat.com".
http://www.JewelBeat.comFoodballBaratsAndBereta2011-08-22 | Q: What do you get when you combine America's two favorite pastimes? A: You get NASCAR drivers shooting guns at each other. ...But this video is about baseball and food, so I don't really understand how your question is relevant here...
Follow us on Twitter or we will find you at whatever time of day is most inconvenient for you: http://twitter.com/#!/baratsandberetaAir GuitarBaratsAndBereta2011-08-01 | Luke went to see his brothers rock Chicago. And they rocked indeed. However, Luke did not rock.
Special Thanks: Niko Pueringer John Lange Lee Barats
"A MAN AND A DREAM" LYRICS:
A MAN IS ATTEMPTING TO ACHIEVE HIS DREAM OF DRINKING AN ENTIRE GALLON OF MILK, MILK GALLON NOW WILL HE SUCCEED? NOT LIKELY SINCE TO DO SO IS WIDELY CONSIDERED IMPOSSIBLE
DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO A MAN AND A DREAM A MAN AND A DREAM OH, A MAN AND A DREAM IT'S POSSIBLE DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO A MAN AND A DREAM THE IMPOSSIBLE IS POSSIBLE IF YOU BELIEVE THE IMPOSSIBLE IS POSSIBLE
A MAN IS ATTEMPTING TO REACH HIS GOAL OF EATING AN ENTIRE SPOONFUL OF CINNAMON, CINNAMON WILL HE SUCCEED? NOT LIKELY SINCE TO DO SO IS WIDELY CONSIDERED IMPOSSIBLE
DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO A MAN AND A DREAM A MAN AND A DREAM OH, A MAN AND A DREAM IT'S POSSIBLE DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO A MAN AND A DREAM THE IMPOSSIBLE IS POSSIBLE IF YOU BELIEVE THE IMPOSSIBLE IS POSSIBLE
"Rainbows and Unicorns" is a censored version for those who prefer to look at unicorns instead of slow motion milk vomit. The original, uncensored version can be seen here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zGWEa3mDFqw
And Twitter! http://www.twitter.com/baratsandberetaGreat Pick-Up Lines in SportsBaratsAndBereta2011-03-01 | Have you ever wanted to watch two guys recreate pick-up lines that never actually happened? Have you ever wanted those two guys to impersonate famous athletes and sports figures, yet not put any effort whatsoever into costuming or accurate impersonations? And have you ever wanted those two guys to hit on the same girl repeatedly and have her be eerily into it? If so, you should REALLY watch this video!
It's called SCOTT & ZANDER'S CRAZY NIGHT, starring Tony Danza, Barats & Bereta, Matt Walsh (The Hangover, Old School), Cleo King (The Hangover, Pineapple Express), Adam Devine and Blake Anderson (Workaholics), Julianna Guill (Glory Daze), Brett Ernst and Ahmed Ahmed (Vince Vaughn's Wild West Comedy Show), and Iliza Shlesinger (Last Comic Standing)2012BaratsAndBereta2011-01-18 | Barats and Bereta
Note: A lot of folks are pointing out that Alexander Graham Bell was Scottish and/or Canadian. This is true, but he was also a US citizen. We debated whether to include him in the vid or not, but given that the telephone was patented in the US and that so much of Bell's work took place in Boston, we felt it was more than fair to include him as a part of US history. (Besides, we didn't really want to cut that joke out of the script.)SKITLETS 4 (Secret, Math, Frat)BaratsAndBereta2010-07-21 | What happens when B&B have an idea that isn't meaty enough to warrant an entire sketch? ...A skitlet happens, that's what.
Episode Four
-Luke Has a Secret
-Math Blows
-The Masochistic Frat Boy
Special Thanks:
Aaron Massey: http://www.youtube.com/user/PodunkPic...
Andy Morgan: http://www.andymogren.com/andymogren...
Noam Bleiweiss: http://thesevenyearplan.com
Stubbs is such a good dog. He obeys my every command.
Special thanks to Matt Barats as well as my little cousins.
And are you on Facebook? So are we. http://apps.facebook.com/baratsandberetaMaxwell Dorian, ValedictorianBaratsAndBereta2010-05-04 | FAQ: Why was this video re-posted?
A: The original video's audio went out of sync with the video over time, so we re-posted the video in order to sync it and improve the resolution a bit.
Here are the lyrics (in case you feel like geeking out):
MAXWELL DORIAN, VALEDICTORIAN
I SPEAK IN THREE WEEKS TO THE ENTIRE AUDITORIUM
HEAVY CORDS BUT I BEAR 'EM, MEDALS CHAFE BUT I WEAR 'EM
SIX STEPS TO ACADEMIC SUCCESS, NOW LET ME SHARE 'EM:
FIRST PERIOD, CALCULUS, EASY AS PI
BUT SUCKAS REAL AS i, THEY TRY TO SPY MY ASSIGNMENT
THEY'D LIKE TO DERIVE WHAT'S INSIDE OF MY HEAD
THAT'S WHERE I MAKE MATH MY MISTRESS, DENOMINATE HER IN BED
KANT KEEP UP WITH ME ONCE PHILOSOPHY STARTS
SO SMART I PICK SARTRE APART, DISCREDIT DESCARTES
I THINK THEREFORE I AM AT THE TOP OF MY CLASS
WHY AM I HERE? LET ME THINK, TO KICK ASS
A THOROUGH UNDERSTANDING OF THOREAU, THIRD PERIOD
A MYRIAD OF WEARY EYES READ THE (IRA) ILIAD
BUT NOT ME I'M A.P. THAT TEXT IS TOO TAME
THEY'RE STRIKING OUT WITH HOMER, I'M RE-JOYCE-IN' IN JAMES
P.E.'S NOT EXACTLY FOR ME, BUT I DON'T CARE
I'LL GET MY "A" ANYWAY-- IN BAND I'M FIRST CHAIR
PIANISSIMO, FORTISSIMO, I GOTTA BE HEARD
YEAH I NEVER MISS A CODA-- NEVER MISS A CODA-- WORD!
SIXTH PERIOD, HISTORY, TOP OF MY GAME
I'M LIKE NAPOLEON BUT TALL, WITHOUT A RUSSIAN CAMPAIGN
I DIDN'T STUDY FOR THE FINAL I'M A DOWNRIGHT HISTORIAN
....MAXWELL DORIAN, SALUTATORIAN
Special thanks to Tyler Jacobson for rocking out the sweet graphics and to Andrew Weed for some kick-A fx work.
If you're on Facebook, might as well follow us there too, right? http://apps.facebook.com/baratsandber...
Q: I swear I've seen this video before. What's the deal?
A: We made this vid back in the day for break.com and only recently got permission to post it on YouTube. So yes, you may have already seen this video on http://www.break.com or on another YouTube channel that ripped and uploaded the video illegally. But this is the first time we've ever uploaded "Facebook" to our YouTube channel, and we're grateful that break.com gave us permission to do so.SKITLETS 3 (Abercrombie, Hillbilly, Son)BaratsAndBereta2010-04-26 | Barats and Bereta
What happens when B&B have more ideas that aren't meaty enough to warrant entire sketches? ...SKITLETS: Episode 3, that's what.
Episode Three: -Abercrombie Squad -The Jealous Hillbilly -The Guy Who Wanted a Son
Lady: Heather Moxcey Mugger: Jon Payne Daughter: Hayden Noel
Special Thanks to Jon Payne, Lacie Runolfson, and Andy Morgan.
Tom: Luke Barats
Trina: Ashley Cooper
Pete: Joe Bereta
Music: Jeff Rosick
Special Thanks: Ty Jacobson, Greg Wildermuth, Dan Garrity, Michelle PhilbinJesus Pwn3d UBaratsAndBereta2010-04-20 | Jesus saves. And pwns.
Special thanks to Tessa Swoboda and Heather Moxcey. And a super-special thanks to the kid in the video, Nick Swoboda, who got tackled from behind 11 times before we got the take we wanted.
---------
Here's the link to the original "Jesus Pwn3d U" video in case you feel like watching it with poor resolution for some perverted reason: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5rF_X-8LiIRobotBaratsAndBereta2010-04-19 | A robot tries to get some action.
Written by: Our hilarious college improv buddy Dan McGivern Robot: Our hilarious improv buddy Caleb MaryAnne: Our hilarious improv buddy Jessica Carson Sexy Jocks: Hilarious / sexy improv buddies Joe Bereta and Luke Barats
Make sure to look at the old shirts too. We will be taking them off the market soon.
3. Gonna reupload a bunch of vids that are really crappy quality, be it low res or audio out of sync. However, we will be adding new content right along with them each Monday!
Reuploads:
Sound of Your Voice
Apocalypse Newscast
Jesus Pwn3d You
Maxwell Dorian
And we will be posting our Break.com exclusives "Robot" and "Facebook"
Music in the Video by Drop Off: http://www.myspace.com/dropoffbandStuntmen for HireBaratsAndBereta2010-03-24 | You better hang some tarps on the wall before you watch Jason and Mason's stuntmen audition tape, because you're about to get your mind blown by gratuitous amounts of awesome.