Uploaded October 2025 | Updated September 2026, 2 weeks ago

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Marge Really, Really Likes All Hallow’s Eve

[verse]
Marge doesn’t technically celebrate Halloween
She says it’s against her religion
Her pastor told her it’s the devil’s night
And participation is strictly forbidden

She’s not allowed to dress up
And by that I mean purchase a costume
But Marge already had that black dress
And in a closet was already a broom

[chorus]
If you spend five minutes talking to her
There’s two bits of information you’ll receive
Her family are members of some conservative church
And Marge really, really likes All Hallow’s Eve

[verse]
When she shows up on Halloween night
Marge won’t say trick or treat
She’ll just ask you politely
If you have any sweet stuff to eat

Marge is not allowed to say the three words
She’s been told is a phrase said by sinners
But she’ll happily eat any candy
That people at doors want to give her

[chorus]
If you spend five minutes talking to her
There’s two bits of information you’ll receive
Her family are members of some conservative church
And Marge really, really likes All Hallow’s Eve

[bridge]
I couldn’t tell you if she’s got loopholes for other occasions
Cause I don’t belong to her religious organization
I do have my own faith, but I don’t want to be lumped in
With any group that won’t honor the Day of the Pumpkin

[chorus]
If you spend five minutes talking to her
There’s two bits of information you’ll receive
Her family are members of some conservative church
And Marge really, really likes all hallows eve
Marge really, really, likes All Hallow’s Eve

[outro]
Margaret, just know that one day you’ll turn eighteen
And nobody will be able to tell you how you can celebrate Halloween!