Uploaded April 2026 | Updated September 2026, 3 weeks ago
Derek Cianfrance's "Blue Valentine" (2010) remains one of the greatest and most realistic depictions of marriage on film. It eschews melodrama in favor of granularity, avoids the typical pitfalls of "relationship films," and probes both characters' psyches, ensuring that neither of them can avoid blame for the state of their marriage. Dean (Ryan Gosling) and Cindy (Michelle Williams) deliver great performances that the film's psychological realism demands.
Read Dan Schneider's classic review of "Blue Valentine": cosmoetica.com/B1171-DES833.htm
Become a Patron and get the show ad-free: patreon.com/c/automachination
Subscribe to the ArtiFact podcast on Spotify: spoti.fi/3xw2M4D
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Amazon Music: amzn.to/2SVJIxB
Podbean: bit.ly/3yzLuUo
iHeartRadio: https://ihr.fm/3AK942L
Learn about our debut film, "From There To There: Bruce Ario, the Minneapolis Poet": automachination.com/cityboy-bruce-ario-great-american-novel
Read more from the automachination universe: automachination.com
Read Alex Sheremet's (archived) essays: alexsheremet.com
Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/automachination
Timestamps:
1:05 -- introducing Derek Cianfrance's "Blue Valentine"; who's that white girl???
2:59 -- initial and later impressions of the film; the effectiveness of its time-jumps; the symbolic and imagistic power of the opening scene; does Dean have a stronger relationship to Megan than her mother?
8:45 -- biases against Dean from female viewers; Dean is a playmate but not really a parent; Alex defends "feral children"; Dean is oddly good with women, but also fears them; Dean's alcoholism; Cindy might not be a drug addict, but she has other addictions and emotional dysregulation
15:49 -- she buys a lot of alcohol for the hotel; Cindy's many sexual partners and inability to connect emotionally; self-loathing & self-abnegation; how people pick and choose their addictions and patterns
21:16 -- substance vs. emotional abuse; Dean's romanticism kills him; personal neediness in both creates this relationship; limerence and projection
26:24 -- Dean says women settle, yet he settles; Dean only begins to drink after this marriage; do they have a deeper "reason" to be together; if she did not get pregnant by an ex, they would have broken up; why did Cindy refuse to go through the abortion?
30:28 -- men's simulated selflessness; Dean and Cindy knows each other's vulnerabilities; impulsivity in both; male/female hero complex; doing your best in the face of hypothetical "meaninglessness"
35:51 -- male sexual strategy in "Blue Valentine"; lack of attraction in this marriage; Alex: the male point of view is idealistic, but not innately unjust; relationships are the ONLY place for cosmic justice
40:36 -- their courtship is sweet and charming, but not necessarily romantic
44:48 -- Dean should have never made his offer; genuine moments of tenderness in "Blue Valentine"; is there an actual "good partner" for Cindy out there
52:12 -- don't start with relationships based on ambiguity; the bus scene soundtrack is rather creepy and ominous; "Blue Valentine" is one of the best depictions of relationships on film
57:42 -- "Blue Valentine" is tied to the times; the "meet cute" inversion; the endpoint of Millennial hipster culture; the Lena Dunham connection
1:00:44 -- the dangers of love at first sight; how fast crushes tend to flame out; Alex shares a GRIM story from his youth...
1:05:13 -- why Alex thinks their marriage might have ended; the anti-symbolism of the film's ending; why Dean has grown more than Cindy; filming around a dying battery; the conversation in the love motel
Tags: #film #review #relationships
Derek Cianfrance's "Blue Valentine" (2010) remains one of the greatest and most realistic depictions of marriage on film. It eschews melodrama in favor of granularity, avoids the typical pitfalls of "relationship films," and probes both characters' psyches, ensuring that neither of them can avoid blame for the state of their marriage. Dean (Ryan Gosling) and Cindy (Michelle Williams) deliver great performances that the film's psychological realism demands.
Read Dan Schneider's classic review of "Blue Valentine": cosmoetica.com/B1171-DES833.htm
Become a Patron and get the show ad-free: patreon.com/c/automachination
Subscribe to the ArtiFact podcast on Spotify: spoti.fi/3xw2M4D
Apple Podcasts: apple.co/3wLpqEV
Amazon Music: amzn.to/2SVJIxB
Podbean: bit.ly/3yzLuUo
iHeartRadio: https://ihr.fm/3AK942L
Learn about our debut film, "From There To There: Bruce Ario, the Minneapolis Poet": automachination.com/cityboy-bruce-ario-great-american-novel
Read more from the automachination universe: automachination.com
Read Alex Sheremet's (archived) essays: alexsheremet.com
Follow us on Twitter: twitter.com/automachination
Timestamps:
1:05 -- introducing Derek Cianfrance's "Blue Valentine"; who's that white girl???
2:59 -- initial and later impressions of the film; the effectiveness of its time-jumps; the symbolic and imagistic power of the opening scene; does Dean have a stronger relationship to Megan than her mother?
8:45 -- biases against Dean from female viewers; Dean is a playmate but not really a parent; Alex defends "feral children"; Dean is oddly good with women, but also fears them; Dean's alcoholism; Cindy might not be a drug addict, but she has other addictions and emotional dysregulation
15:49 -- she buys a lot of alcohol for the hotel; Cindy's many sexual partners and inability to connect emotionally; self-loathing & self-abnegation; how people pick and choose their addictions and patterns
21:16 -- substance vs. emotional abuse; Dean's romanticism kills him; personal neediness in both creates this relationship; limerence and projection
26:24 -- Dean says women settle, yet he settles; Dean only begins to drink after this marriage; do they have a deeper "reason" to be together; if she did not get pregnant by an ex, they would have broken up; why did Cindy refuse to go through the abortion?
30:28 -- men's simulated selflessness; Dean and Cindy knows each other's vulnerabilities; impulsivity in both; male/female hero complex; doing your best in the face of hypothetical "meaninglessness"
35:51 -- male sexual strategy in "Blue Valentine"; lack of attraction in this marriage; Alex: the male point of view is idealistic, but not innately unjust; relationships are the ONLY place for cosmic justice
40:36 -- their courtship is sweet and charming, but not necessarily romantic
44:48 -- Dean should have never made his offer; genuine moments of tenderness in "Blue Valentine"; is there an actual "good partner" for Cindy out there
52:12 -- don't start with relationships based on ambiguity; the bus scene soundtrack is rather creepy and ominous; "Blue Valentine" is one of the best depictions of relationships on film
57:42 -- "Blue Valentine" is tied to the times; the "meet cute" inversion; the endpoint of Millennial hipster culture; the Lena Dunham connection
1:00:44 -- the dangers of love at first sight; how fast crushes tend to flame out; Alex shares a GRIM story from his youth...
1:05:13 -- why Alex thinks their marriage might have ended; the anti-symbolism of the film's ending; why Dean has grown more than Cindy; filming around a dying battery; the conversation in the love motel
Tags: #film #review #relationships
