Healing After Trauma with Dr. Peter Levine | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-04-29 | Somatic psychology legend Dr. Peter Levine joins Dr. Rick and I to explore how we can use body-based approaches to recover from traumatic experiences. Peter uses his personal history with trauma to illustrate the practices he’s taught to thousands of people through his work. We discuss the importance of resourcing experiences, creating safety, developing interoception, abandonment wounds, bringing a diverse perspective to somatic work, and working with shame. Please be aware that this episode includes a description of sexual assault.About our Guest: Dr. Peter Levine is the creator of Somatic Experiencing and the Founder and President of the Ergos Institute for Somatic Education. He’s taught at a number of universities, has received Lifetime Achievement awards from numerous organizations, and is the best-selling author of several books, including Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma, and his most recent book An Autobiography of Trauma: A Healing Journey.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:10 Peter’s dream about publishing his recent book6:40 Themes connecting the personal and professional for Peter10:20 Physicalization, pendulation, and decontextualization of trauma16:40 Presence with others, and moving gently into shame to move through it21:20 The fundamental view that we our innately healthy, and completing the arc23:40 When the prompt “feel it in your body” doesn’t work27:55 Advice for when you don’t have access to therapy or a SEP practitioner30:15 Tenderness34:10 Anchoring in the here and now when accessing past memories39:10 Conceiving of yourself as a source of safety43:20 Generating your own internal wellbeing46:10 Acknowledging the reality of your history, patience, and completion49:40 Living by dying52:20 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hansonSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Youve already proved your resilience Forrest Hanson 2025-01-15 | You’ve made it through every bad day you’ve ever had. That’s resilience. Not in a hypothetical way, but a proven one—by virtue of the fact that you’re here, right now. This clip is from the January 13th episode of the Being Well podcast, where Dr. Rick Hanson and I explore limerence, love, and navigating life transitions. #resilience #startnow #limerence #personalgrowth #lifetransitions #selfdevelopment #growthmindset #overcomingfear #motivation #selfreflection #beingwellpodcast
This is how we actually heal Forrest Hanson 2025-01-14 | Many of us try to think our way out of pain, but healing requires slowing down and (safely) feeling what we’ve avoided. In the December 16th, 2024 episode of Being Well, somatic therapist Elizabeth Ferreira explains how trauma fragments us and why reconnecting with those parts starts with creating space for felt experiences.Full video: youtube.com/watch?v=4gZLaTCLE6o&feature=youtu.be
The three requirements for ANY relationship Forrest Hanson 2025-01-13 | What should you look for in a relationship? Here are three simple qualifiers:1. They think you’re awesome.2. They’re fundamentally kind. 3. You genuinely enjoy being around them. From the January 6th, 2025 episode of Being Well podcast titled Navigating Situationships: How to Get What You Really Want
From Limerence to Real Love: January Mailbag | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2025-01-13 | Dr. Rick and I begin the mailbag by exploring limerence – an obsessive form of romantic attraction – and offer practical recommendations for working with one-sided infatuation. We then discuss what to do when romantic vulnerability feels unsafe, and how we can rebuild trust in others after traumatic experiences. The episode also tackles managing career transitions, dealing with social anxiety around positive interactions, and maintaining boundaries without being consumed by anger. Key Topics:0:00 Introduction0:45 What can I do when I experience limerence, or compulsive romantic attraction?17:30 How can I learn to trust my partner and embrace the experience of happiness in my relationship?26:45 How can I best think about the inherent uncertainty in the 2-3 years of preparation for a new career path?37:50 How can I learn to “take in the good” when good experiences feel uncomfortable for me?44:05 How can I maintain important boundaries in a way that doesn’t lead to me feeling too much anger?56:10 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Can people change their attachment style? Forrest Hanson 2025-01-12 | Can people change their attachment style? This episode of Being Well podcast is an Attachment Masterclass with guests like Dr. Sue Johnson, Dr. Rick Hanson, Dr. Julie Menanno, and Elizabeth Ferreira. Listen here: youtube.com/watch?v=ha0hfK9QWR4
Find those who make you feel like you MATTER Forrest Hanson 2025-01-09 | Everyone deserves to feel like they matter. Dr. Rick Hanson reminds us that, too often, people settle for relationships that are shallow or one-sided, leaving them feeling unseen and unfulfilled.The truth is, you deserve a relationship where you are valued deeply and genuinely, with people who are ready to show up and give their hearts.Listen to this week's episode on Situationships to learn more: youtube.com/watch?v=jp1vHQFQI_g&t=2s
The truth about situationships Forrest Hanson 2025-01-07 | Situationships often persist because we avoid asking the tough questions that would bring clarity. Is it fear of rejection? Protecting ourselves from pain? Or something else entirely?Watch the full episode, "Navigating Situationships:" How to Get What You Really Want, and you can watch it here: youtube.com/watch?v=jp1vHQFQI_g
Navigating Situationships: How to Get What You Want | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2025-01-06 | Dr. Rick joins me to explore "situationships" – those poorly defined, boundary-free relationships that exist in a gray area between friendship and committed dating. We unpack why these arrangements have become so common, examine the emotional trade-offs that keep people stuck, and share how to reclaim a sense of agency and build more authentic connections. The episode includes a role-play where I play someone struggling with situationships, and Rick draws on his decades of experience as a couples counselor to offer some guidance.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:30 What is a situationship?7:25 The benefits of a situationship, and relationship asymmetry13:15 A roleplay of sharing your feelings21:05 Uncertainty, wanting to be liked, and the fear of asking for what you want30:25 Gears of rapport, and knowing your worth37:35 Honoring yourself when a change is needed 46:50 How much to care, and the natural arc of change51:25 Early indicators that someone is ready for a relationship57:50 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to (actually) Achieve Your Resolutions in 2025 | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-12-30 | Why do New Year's resolutions usually fail by February? @RickHanson and I explore why traditional goal-setting falls short and offer a new approach to creating lasting change. We discuss how we can uncover our authentic wants and needs, move away from a punishment mindset, and use our new knowledge to find fulfillment. This episode will teach you how to get more out of any other New Year’s content you listen to. In the episode we walk through a practical example of brain dumping “shoulds,” shifting the focus from means to ends, and working with internal resistance. We then end the episode with a role-play focused on working with someone who wants to find a more meaningful relationship.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:25 A sense of fulfillment, and other healthy ways of orienting to our goals14:20 Cataloguing our “shoulds”, and being driven by a sense of enthusiasm23:45 How Forrest has personally connected with his authentic wants29:55 The “punishment part”35:45 Practical techniques for identifying our values41:50 A roleplay of how to find a meaningful relationship51:30 Reviewing the roleplay55:30 Knowing your why1:00:20 Developing your personal psychology, and surrendering to the best within you1:04:25 RecapRick’s Yearly Program: Rick’s Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like mindfulness, motivation, and confidence. It’s currently on sale, and if you like Being Well we think you’ll love it. Follow the link here and use coupon code beingwell20 for an additional 20% off: RickHanson.com/FWBSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Attachment Masterclass: The Art and Science of Connection | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-12-23 | Why do some people navigate the social world with such ease while others feel like they're swimming upstream? In this special episode of Being Well, I'm joined by four leading experts for a masterclass on the science of attachment. Featuring conversations with Dr. Sue Johnson, Dr. Rick Hanson, Julie Mennano, and Elizabeth Ferreira, this carefully curated episode gives you a map to becoming more socially confident, emotionally intelligent, and authentically connected. Topics include:• The four fundamental patterns that influence how we show up in every social interaction.• Dr. Sue Johnson's guide to having deeper, more meaningful "hold me tight" conversations.• Dr. Rick Hanson’s approach to working with self-abandonment.• Julie Mennano on working with the anxious-avoidant dance that brings so many couples to therapy.• Elizabeth Ferreira’s somatic and trauma-informed perspective on healing attachment wounds.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:40 Rick Hanson: How to become securely attached29:50 Working with common attachment wounds46:35 Sue Johnson: How to have a bonding conversation1:08:40 Julie Mennano: The attachment mistakes that bring people to therapy, and how secure couples relate differently1:21:35 Rick Hanson: Self-abandonment, anxious attachment, and how to build up a greater sense of self-worth and self-trust1:39:05 Elizabeth Ferreira: Creating a secure relationship1:55:45 Recap and outroAbout our Guests: Dr. Sue Johnson is a clinical psychologist, researcher, professor, and the founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a widely used and respected approach to couples therapy. She is considered one of the foremost experts in the field of attachment, and has received numerous awards for her contributions to the field of psychotherapy. Dr. Johnson is also the author of seven books, including the best-selling Hold Me Tight.Elizabeth Ferreira is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist working in California. She specializes in somatic approaches to trauma work. Julie Menanno a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor, and Relationship Coach. She is the founder of The Secure Relationship coaching method, and maintains an instagram of the same name with over 1M followers. She is also the author of Secure Love.Subscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Work with Your Parts: Complex PTSD, IFS, and Dissociation | Elizabeth Ferreira Forrest Hanson 2024-12-16 | Somatic therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins the show to answer questions from listeners, and discuss complex trauma, dissociation, and working with challenging emotions. Elizabeth and I start by exploring the relationship between Internal Family Systems and somatic therapy, including how we can apply a somatic lens to working with our parts. We then apply that framework to complex PTSD, cognitive bypassing, emotional numbing, hypervigilance, and other difficult experiences. Other topics include issues around comparing trauma, windows of tolerance, appreciating individual needs, and Elizabeth’s own journey of becoming a therapist while managing C-PTSD and ADHD.About our Guest: @elizabeth.ferreira is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist working in California. She specializes in somatic approaches to trauma work. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:10 What is the crossover between IFS and somatic therapy?12:35 When self-awareness doesn’t create change.19:10 Dissociation, and tracking your window of presence34:55 Emotional numbing, and how to feel your feelings again41:10 Hypervigilance, and staying present without catastrophizing49:00 How do I respond to those who minimize trauma?59:35 What’s helped you get what you want from life while living with trauma and neurodivergence?1:11:45 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Why You Chase, and How to Stop: The Pursuer-Distancer Dynamic | Being Well Podcast Forrest Hanson 2024-12-09 | We all have different needs for closeness and distance, for intimacy and independence. You might have heard terms like anxious or avoidant attachment to describe this, and these tendencies can create challenges - particularly when people with different needs try to relate to each other. In this episode, @RickHanson and I explore why we're drawn to people who activate our insecurities, how anxiety manifests differently in "pursuers" versus "distancers," and what we can all do to work with our natural tendencies more skillfully. We also discuss common relationship patterns, why pursuers usually receive more blame than distancers, schizoid personalities, and practical ways to break free from entrenched patterns.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:50 Key characteristics of pursuers and distancers9:00 Demands and reassurance13:40 Assigning blame, and gender stereotypes21:10 Why opposites attract, the power of small wins, and changing ourselves31:00 The distancer40:55 Finding motivation to identify common ground with our partner55:10 The pursuer1:00:35 Self-consciousness and ego1:03:00 Brave questions to ask in your relationship1:07:55 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Why We Don’t Change (and what you can do about it) | Dr. Ross Ellenhorn, Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-12-02 | Why does change feel so difficult, even when we desperately want it? Dr. Ross Ellenhorn joins the show to explore our resistance to change, and the many good reasons we might have to stay just as we are. We discuss the “fear of hope,” the allure of sameness, and what actually helps people develop the confidence to make meaningful changes in their lives. Topics include challenging conventional self-help wisdom, existential dread, dealing with disappointment, major issues in social work, psychedelics, and self-compassion.About our Guest: Ross Ellenhorn is a psychotherapist and sociologist, the owner and CEO of Ellenhorn, a community-integration program offering services for individuals experiencing addictive behaviors or extreme and complex states of mind and mood, and the author of three books including How We Change (and Ten Reasons Why We Don’t).Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:20 How Dr. Ross’s background in social work influences his outlook on change6:30 What makes people want to stay the same18:50 Self-efficacy, faith, and making hope big26:10 Seeing your problems as solutions30:25 Grappling with existential anxiety35:00 The shock of recognition, and connecting with motivations through dialog41:45 Managing disappointment45:05 Psychosocial rehab, and the changing definition of mental health55:05 Psychedelics and direct action1:07:35 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
When Life Falls Apart: A Psychologists Step-by-Step Guide | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-11-25 | Life has a way of throwing unexpected curveballs: a sudden job loss, a relationship ending, a health crisis, or losing faith in something. These moments can leave us feeling overwhelmed, lost, and unsure of how to move forward. In this episode, @RickHanson and I explore a practical framework for navigating life's most challenging transitions. We break down the essential steps for finding your footing when things fall apart: managing the initial emotional impact, steadying yourself, gathering information, working with loss, and taking meaningful action.You'll learn how to process difficult emotions without getting stuck, ways to evaluate your situation objectively while avoiding common cognitive biases, strategies for decision making under stress, and approaches to building resilience and finding meaning in challenging experiences.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction4:55 Four steps to find your footing when things fall apart7:00 Stabilizing your body, and reestablishing routine14:45 Slowing down, and confirmation bias17:30 Emotional first aid, limiting stressors, and rumination29:00 Identifying what is reliable in your life32:05 Facing reality, and gathering information39:20 Processing loss and disappointment47:35 Making a plan and taking action52:10 Post-traumatic growth57:45 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Make HARD Choices: Relationships, Career, and Values | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-11-18 | We all have to make big choices in life, but it’s easy to feel overwhelmed when facing major decisions about careers, relationships, or personal growth. In this episode, Dr. Rick Hanson and I explore how to develop a reliable system for making choices that align with your values and goals. We break down balancing analysis with intuition, the five key decision-making styles, and common obstacles that lead to poor choices. The episode also includes two live demonstrations of working through a big decision.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction3:40 Analysis vs. intuition, and activities vs. results10:40 Effort, values, and the environments you put yourself in17:00 The five decision-making styles29:00 Motives and attachment32:45 Rigidity, excessive certainty, and other common pitfalls41:30 Demo #1 - Reverse-engineering a career decision (or Rick with a legal pad)1:04:45 Demo #2 - Deciding whether to invest deeply in a romantic relationship1:18:20 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
The Science of Attraction: Why the Manosphere is Just Wrong Forrest Hanson 2024-11-14 | Young men are bombarded with messages pushing them to be more masculine in order to attract women. This creates insecurity, is connected to a wide variety of social ills, and usually doesn't even work. I struggled with this for a long time, here's what I've learned about what really makes someone attractive.Loved working on this, hope you enjoy it. Big shouts to Joel the video editor. 0:00 Introduction3:20 Does more masculine = more attractive?8:48 What traits have we attached to masculinity?11:39 Hegemonic masculinity16:00 The intention-behavior gap19:20 What really makes someone attractive?21:30 Focus on what you can control24:59 The two key elements of charisma27:04 Listen28:25 Values30:19 Who's excited to be around you?32:08 Oh no bears35:33 Dat body38:07 So what you're saying is be less masculine?Research referenced:Oh, D., Grant-Villegas, N., & Todorov, A. (2020). The eye wants what the heart wants: Female face preferences are related to partner personality preferences. Journal of Experimental Psychology: Human Perception and Performance, 46(11), 1328–1343. doi.org/10.1037/xhp0000858Felesina, T., & Zietsch, B. (2024). The Desirable Dad Hypothesis: Male Same-Sex Attraction as the Product of Selection for Paternal Care via Antagonistic Pleiotropy. Archives of sexual behavior, 53(5), 1731–1745. doi.org/10.1007/s10508-023-02780-7Sheeran, P. (2002). Intention—Behavior Relations: A Conceptual and Empirical Review. European Review of Social Psychology, 12(1), 1–36. doi.org/10.1080/14792772143000003Eastwick, P. W., & Finkel, E. J. (2008). Sex differences in mate preferences revisited: Do people know what they initially desire in a romantic partner? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 94(2), 245–264. doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.94.2.245Hyde, J. S. (2005). The Gender Similarities Hypothesis. American Psychologist, 60(6), 581-592.Lewontin, R. C. (1972). The Apportionment of Human Diversity. Evolutionary Biology, 6, 381-398.Verčič, A.T., & Verčič, D. (2011). Generic charisma Conceptualization and measurement. Fuel and Energy Abstracts.Subscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Beat Burnout: Slow Productivity with Cal Newport | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-11-11 | We’re tired, burnt out, and searching for a reprieve from hustle culture. Something needs to change if we’re going to get to real productivity: doing that is meaningful and fulfilling rather than just checking boxes off an endless to-do list. On today’s episode, @CalNewportMedia joins the podcast to explore slow productivity, deep work, and how we can achieve more by doing less.About our Guest: Cal is a computer science professor at Georgetown University and the bestselling author of eight books including Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World and most recently, Slow Productivity: The Lost Art of Accomplishment Without Burnout. He also has a YouTube channel and hosts the podcast Deep Questions with Cal Newport. Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:40 Slow productivity vs. pseudoproductivity10:30 Anxiety, procrastination, and overwhelm17:35 Meaningful work and anti-productivity22:10: Technology, anti-capitalist philosophy, and knowledge work28:55 The cognitive drain of multitasking32:45 The distraction of phones social media36:05 The ratio of deep work to lighter work40:10 How timeblocking actually reduces stress44:35 Office hours and shared documents47:10 Common misconceptions about Cal’s work55:15 Tailoring advice to your individual situation1:00:15 Life transitions, and the deceptive advice to “follow your passion”1:07:50 Obsessing over quality while avoiding perfectionism1:17:25 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Attachment, Boundaries, and Finding Yourself: Relationship Mailbag | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-11-04 | @RickHanson and I answer listener questions focused on navigating relationship challenges. We explore how to rediscover yourself after a codependent relationship, distinguish between healthy and unhealthy desires, maintain friendships after romantic feelings emerge, overcome self-consciousness in social interactions, and communicate effectively during stress responses. Whether you're healing from a breakup, working through attachment issues, or seeking to build more authentic connections, this episode offers practical advice.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction0:40 After a breakup, how can I reconnect with myself and identify what I really want?8:00 How do I distinguish between healthy and unhealthy wanting?18:50 How can I stay friends with someone I’ve had romantic feelings for?31:45 How can I learn to let my thoughts and speech flow more naturally?38:30 How can I communicate with care when I find myself in an attachment-related freeze response?56:00 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Heal Your Inner Child | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-10-28 | We all have an "inner child:” the part of ourselves that carries the emotions, beliefs and experiences from our early years. While this aspect of ourselves can be a source of creativity, playfulness and wonder, it might also harbor unresolved wounds that affect our adult relationships and behaviors. In this episode, @RickHanson and I explore what the inner child really is, how it manifests in our lives, and practical ways to work with this important part of ourselves. We discuss how to identify inner child wounds, demonstrate techniques like voice dialogue, and share strategies for bringing more awareness and healing to our younger selves.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:10 What is the inner child?7:25 How the inner child shows up in our adult lives10:40 A CBT-ish way of thinking about the inner child16:40 Unmet needs, and examples of inner child wounds21:40 Promoting the positive aspects of the inner child29:10 How to begin engaging with the inner child34:55 Shame, and turning toward yourself38:25 Reparenting46:00 Voice Dialogue demonstration1:00:00 Reflections on the demonstration1:05:45 Other approaches, and reasons you might be having a hard time1:09:10 Rage and release, looking at pictures, and creating an autobiography1:13:45 Balancing the inner child's desires with the realities of life1:19:50 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I make videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Living With Anxiety: Resilience, Exposure, and Tolerating Uncertainty | Anxiety Josh, Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-10-21 | Anxiety is something we all experience from time to time, and because it’s so common it can be easy to take it lightly. But anxiety dominates the lives of many people, and in this episode psychotherapist Joshua Fletcher joins me for an in-depth exploration of anxiety. We talk about the anxiety cycle, moving away from thinking in terms of a “cure,” and the key target of the “willful tolerance of uncertainty.” Josh also shares insights on exposure therapy, managing self-criticism, and developing greater self-awareness. About our Guest: Joshua Fletcher, also known as @anxietyjosh, is a psychotherapist based in Manchester, UK, and the author of several books, including his newest, "and how does that make you feel?" Joshua also co-hosts the podcast "Disordered," and you may have bumped into his content on Tiktok or Instagram, where he has over a quarter million followers. Key Topics:0:00 Introduction3:25 Josh’s first panic attack10:25 The vicious cycle of threat monitoring14:25 The three magic words: “just in case”20:25 The “willful tolerance of uncertainty”26:35 Exposure therapy31:30 Working with self-criticism41:10 Reward, punishment, and trauma48:00 Identifying our varied inner voices52:10 Worried voice, false comfort, and wise mind53:55 Approaching anxiety as a neurodivergent person58:10 Healthy disenchantment1:00:15 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Self-Compassion: How to Make it Work for You | Dr. Chris Germer, Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-10-14 | Why do so many people struggle with self-compassion? Dr. Chris Germer (@christophergermerph.d.8791) co-creator of the Mindful Self-Compassion program, joins me to explore how we can work with the deeply ingrained shame that gets in the way.Dr. Germer shares common misunderstandings about self-compassion, and we discuss the complex interplay between shame, self-criticism, and our capacity for self-care. I then focus on the paradox of self-compassion: how approaching it as a “solution to your problems” can actually get in the way of it helping you out. Dr. Germer then shares the model of safety, challenge, and overwhelm, including how we can use it to guide our practice, get to the bottom of shame, and avoid burnout along the way.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:30 What people get wrong about self-compassion 5:00 Tender vs. fierce self-compassion, and the "paradox of practice"11:45 Shame and self-compassion18:00 Safety, challenge, and overwhelm23:05 Holding ourselves before holding our experience31:30 Burnout, and inner-kindness vs. external approval37:25 Loving ourselves up vs. getting to the bottom of shame42:10 Four ways of applying mindfulness to self-compassion practice49:00 Overzealousness, and clarity of intention53:40 Motivating ourselves57:30 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Overcoming Social Anxiety: Attachment, Exposure, and Self-Confidence | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-10-07 | In this episode, Dr. Rick and I explore the all-too-common challenge of social anxiety. We break down what it really means to be socially anxious (hint: it's not just being shy), where those feelings come from, and why they stick around. Rick explains the roots of social anxiety, highlighting the role of attachment styles and individual temperament, before I share how to locate yourself on a spectrum from everyday nervousness to Social Anxiety Disorder. We then discuss evidence-based approaches to working with social anxiety like exposure therapy, cognitive defusion, and mindfulness techniques. Whether you experience feelings of anxiety or are trying to understand a friend who does, this episode will help you feel more confident and connected.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:40 What is social anxiety?7:00 Where does social anxiety come from?13:40 Feeling worthy, and other social factors17:05 Nature vs. nurture23:25 Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) and comorbid diagnoses29:05 Exposure therapy and how to practice it safely41:20 Positive reinforcement, and responding to ruminative thoughts55:15 Widening our view, and taking in the good1:02:55 Talking with younger parts, and self-compassion1:09:55 Normalizing anxiety1:11:15 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
The Dark Triad: Dealing with Narcissists, Sociopaths, and other Toxic People | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-09-30 | @RickHanson and I unpack the "Dark Triad" of personality traits - narcissism, Machiavellianism, and sociopathy - and explore how these traits can affect everyday relationships. We dive into how individuals with these tendencies use charm and manipulation to control situations and people, and offer practical strategies for identifying these traits in others. You’ll learn how to set boundaries, protect yourself from manipulation, and develop a thoughtful, empathetic approach when navigating relationships with those who exhibit these challenging behaviors. The episode also explores self-care in difficult dynamics, the ethical considerations in labeling others, and how to manage unavoidable interactions with people who display these traits. It’s essential listening for anyone who has encountered toxic behavior, and wants to learn how to deal with it more effectively.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction and disclaimers3:40 The Dark Triad: Narcissism, Machiavellianism, and Sociopathy7:30 Charisma, privilege, and why some people get away with antisocial behavior16:05 Sensitivity to criticism, viewing people as means to ends, and other evidence22:35 Being careful about labeling people28:00 Developing awareness, and grieving reality32:15 Boundaries and safety37:15 Limiting the scope of the relationship41:35 How to break through the “fuzz” in communication48:50 Transference, and when it’s safe to confront people54:50 Self-care in unavoidable situations59:00 When you notice these tendencies in yourself1:01:45 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Secure Attachment Relationships: How to get what you never had | Julie Menanno, Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-09-23 | I sit down with marriage and family therapist Julie Menanno to explore one of the most crucial aspects of healthy relationships: secure attachment. We discuss the impact of anxious, avoidant, and secure attachment patterns, and provide practical advice on identifying and communicating attachment needs, fostering emotional safety, and addressing the common anxious-avoidant partner dynamic. Julie highlights the importance of emotional validation and recommends strategies for communicating from the heart. Julie and I then talk about what we can learn from how securely attached couples navigate conflict and repair. This episode is perfect for anyone looking to strengthen their relationships!Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:10 Attachment styles and emotional safety4:20 Identifying and meeting attachment needs12:40 How attachment styles shape our relationships19:25 The “anxious-avoidant” partner dynamic26:00 Communicating from the heart31:50 Emotional validation35:00 Conflict and repair in a securely attached relationship44:20 How a therapist manages escalation and overwhelm50:05 The power of choice in relationships56:10 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Social Anxiety, Self-Advocacy, and Too Much Self-Help: September Mailbag | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-09-16 | @RickHanson and I dive into the mailbag, and answer questions from listeners focused on working with anxiety in ourselves and our relationships. We start with a question that’s essential to the podcast as a whole: is it possible to be too preoccupied with personal growth? Rick talks about how to manage the desire for approval, offering strategies to foster self-acceptance and healthier self-validation, before I share my own journey with finding the right amount of try-hard. We then discuss how to create more collaborative decisions in relationships. Additional topics include self-motivation and peak performance, working with diverse needs, and diagnostic “scope creep.”Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:05 Am I too preoccupied with self-help and personal growth?11:20 How do I address my unquenchable thirst for approval?26:20 How can I tell if I’m actually doing my best?35:55 How do I advocate for more shared decision making with my partner?53:15 How does the brain’s natural pursuit of novelty balance with its desire for safety?1:03:00: RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Cognitive Bypassing and Managing Trauma Responses with Simone Saunders | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-09-09 | I dive into cognitive bypassing - a common strategy many of us use to avoid feeling difficult emotions - with trauma therapist Simone Saunders @Simonecsaunders. Simone and I discuss the connection between cognitive bypassing and trauma before exploring somatic tools that can help us avoid an endless cycle of overthinking, and fully process our experiences. We focus on the “freeze” and “fawn” stress responses, and talk about how these responses can impact our relationships and everyday interactions. The conversation widens from there to include topics like letting go of unhealthy relationships, navigating the shame that can come with self-awareness, working through triggers, finding more agency, and changing our models of conflict. Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:15 What’s cognitive bypassing?5:45 Somatic approaches, and widening the window of tolerance18:20 The freeze and fawn responses22:40 Grieving letting go of unhealthy relationships25:45 Shame, the problem with self-awareness, and identifying your values35:05 How to move through “first contact” with our triggers38:00 Feeling connected to others41:40 Agency, and being embodied in a relationship46:55 Changing how we see conflict51:00 Grief as self-awareness, and expressing ourselves57:15 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Psychologist Shares What EVERY Parent Needs to Know | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-09-02 | In this special conversation, I explore what it means to be a good father with my dad, clinical psychologist @RickHanson. We discuss the joys, challenges, and unexpected lessons of parenthood, starting with the advice Rick would have given himself. Rick and I tackle the mental health challenges new parents face, focusing particularly on maintaining a strong relationship between partners. We get real about our relationship, and Rick offers practical strategies for "resetting" with your partner during stressful times. We then talk about different approaches to parenting, and how to find a healthy balance of authority, aspiration, and nurturance. Whether you’re navigating the path of parenthood, reflecting on your relationship with your own parents, or just looking to gain some insight into the father-son dynamic, this episode has something for everyone. Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:50 Did becoming a dad change Rick’s relationship with his parents?4:55 What advice would Rick give a younger version of himself?8:40 Biological stressors, and the mental health challenges of young parents17:05 Maintaining closeness with your children while working21:35 How to “reset” with your partner31:15 Savoring the good times34:40 Authority, aspiration, and nurturance43:30 Parenting the child you have, and emotional regulation51:20 Recognizing that kids are not tiny adults58:00 Staying consistent59:40 How to practice for becoming a parent1:01:30 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Living in an Anxious World: Uncertainty, Agency, and Resilience | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-08-26 | @RickHanson joins me for an episode on the anxiety and uncertainty so many are feeling about the state of the world. We discuss why everything feels so overwhelming right now, share practical ways to manage those emotions, and explore how we can stay grounded, take ownership of what we can control, and maintain a sense of connection with others. Topics include managing uncertainty, wise skepticism, developing agency, accepting impermanence, and understanding grief as a deep form of love and connection. Whether you're feeling anxious about global events or just navigating daily life, this episode offers practical advice for building resilience.I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:45 Why do things feel so terrifying?11:55 A typical response to the state of the world17:30 Recognizing how much uncertainty there is26:15 Feeling grounded in your personal integrity32:00 Taking ownership of what you are able to contribute40:00 Our felt sense of connection with others44:40 Accepting impermanence49:35 Grief as a form of love and connection54:05 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Embracing Perfectionism with Katherine Morgan Schafler | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-08-19 | Therapist and author Katherine Morgan Schafler joins me to explore how to harness perfectionism’s strengths without getting captured by its vulnerabilities. We talk about perfectionism’s bad branding, and how our relationship with perfectionism can lead to it being either a superpower or a stumbling block. We discuss the different types of perfectionists, the limitations of defining perfectionism merely as a defense against criticism, and the importance of shifting our language around self-criticism. You’ll learn about the difference between power and control, why self-compassion beats self-punishment, and how to keep perfectionism in check while still reaching your goals.About our Guest: Katherine is a psychotherapist, former on-site therapist at Google, and author of the recent book The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control: A Path to Peace and Power.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:30 Defining perfectionism6:40 Ideals, identity, and asking yourself how and why you’re striving13:55 The five types of perfectionists22:15 Why defining perfectionism as a ‘defense against criticism’ falls short28:45 Changing our vocabulary around self-criticism33:40 Why self-punishment doesn’t work38:00 The difference between power and control44:25 Splitting vs. scaling, and reaching out for connection49:05 When perfectionistic tendencies invade our relationships54:05 The intention that drives real goals, and finding your metric for measuring success1:07:15 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Facing Your Shadow: Become Your True Self | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-08-12 | Dr. Rick and I explore one of the most interesting concepts in psychology: Carl Jung’s concept of the shadow. The shadow includes the “the things a person has no wish to be,” the uncomfortable aspects of ourselves that we deny or ignore. Facing those parts can be difficult, but becoming aware of the shadow, accepting it, and integrating it allows us to embrace all of who we are. We start by explaining what the shadow is, where it comes from, and why it’s valuable. Rick shares some examples of shadow material, what we lose by leaving them behind, and how we can start reintegrating them. I talk about modern approaches to shadow work, and viewing the shadow through a less dualistic lens. We then map out the “typical” path of what is usually a highly individualized process. Hope you enjoy it!Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:45 Defining the shadow - things we leave out, or don’t care to know4:30 Individuation12:15 Some examples of shadow material18:50 What do we lose by not incorporating the shadow?23:45 Agency, creativity, authenticity, and unrecognized capabilities26:25 Patience, knowing your why, inner refuge, and befriending parts31:40 Acceptance,, awareness of projection, and being in dialog with our shadow38:00 Deliberate practice, stepping into the wild, and showing curiosity46:30 The golden shadow, and accepting impulses vs. acting on them55:40 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Dealing with Other People’s Defenses: How to Solve Most Arguments | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-08-05 | Dr. Rick and I tackle the tricky topic of dealing with other people’s psychological defenses. It’s often easier to see other people’s defenses than to see our own, which can make them particularly frustrating to deal with. In this episode, Rick and I explore the psychological and communication skills that will allow you to have more successful conversations.We start with a quick summary of what psychological defenses are and how they operate, before talking about recognizing our biases, showing empathy, and establishing a productive tone. Rick explains how to break the cycle of counterattacks that can happen when people get defensive, and how to balance different needs for closeness and distance. Topics include effective communication skills, moving from criticism toward values, managing frustration, and helping other people become more self-aware.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction, psychological defenses recap3:25 Why can’t we see other people’s defenses?10:25 Recognizing our own vulnerabilities, and showing empathy14:20 Setting the tone20:10 Disrupting the cycle of counterattacks 24:20 Approaching differing needs for closeness and distance30:10 Joining with empathy before escalating requests37:55 A mutual orientation toward growth40:50 Seeing openings for dialog when they present themselves42:45 Basing dialog around values vs. criticism46:50 Managing frustration52:35 Is there any way to help others become more self-aware?1:00:45 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
If You’re “Too Self-Aware,” Watch This | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-07-29 | Have you ever felt like you knew yourself a little too well? While self-awareness is usually helpful, it can sometimes lead to overwhelm, anxiety, confusion, and self-consciousness. In this episode, Dr. Rick and I explore what we can do if we feel like we’re “too self-aware.” We begin by identifying some of the issues that can arise with self-awareness, differentiating it from self-consciousness, and highlighting how conflict between different parts can stop us from becoming who we want to be. We then discuss how developing ego strength can help us become more authentic and free in our behavior. Rick then guides me through a role-play exercise aimed at reducing self-consciousness and social anxiety, and addressing parts of ourselves we may not like.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:30 What does "too self-aware" look like?3:55 Three ways self-awareness can cause problems, and four stages of growth8:25 Self-consciousness, and outside-in vs. inside-out14:35 Authenticity, feeling stuck, and internalizing judgment19:10 Ego strength, and what helps people navigate overwhelm28:55 What not to do, and a roleplay with Forrest35:25 Showing interest in others, and rumination39:55 More roleplay, anxiety, over-analysis, and shame53:30 Qualities we like and can embrace about an exiled part1:01:50 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Break Out of a Depressed Mood | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-07-22 | About 30% of people will experience depression at some point in their lives, and most of us know what a depressed mood feels like. Because depressive episodes are common, there’s no lack of good advice out there. But depression is so challenging in part because it attacks our ability to do anything about it. Depression saps our energy, is demotivating, and makes it difficult to actually put that good advice into practice. In this episode, @RickHanson and I explore what we can do about this, and how we can break out of an episode of depressed mood. We start by talking about what causes depression, introduce the biopsychosocial model, and identify an overall framework for most depressive episodes. We then explain the vicious cycle of depressed mood before focusing on what a person can do practically to break the cycle. Topics include identifying mindsets, changing how we interpret information, fully experiencing our emotions, rumination and ruminatory processes, taking in the good, and creating openness to possibility. Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:10 Distinguishing a depressed mood from MDD7:20 Causes of depression12:30 Absolutist beliefs and self-compassion18:05 The paradox of motivation, and small ways to break the cycle24:40 Fully experiencing your feelings, and emotional release31:00 Discerning between thoughts and experiences38:20 Rumination, finding evidence of positive change, and interoception42:45 Recognizing what you don’t know, being receptive to love, and simply being52:00 RecapI'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.Subscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
If you feel stuck, this is for you | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-07-15 | Most of us have gone through a time in life when it felt like we were stuck: unable to deal with our issues, change in useful ways, or make our lives the way we wanted them to be. It’s often not for lack of trying. You read the books, you followed the exercises, you maybe even saw a therapist…but it just didn’t help. On today’s episode, @RickHanson and I explore why this happens and what we can do about it. Rick shares a simple framework we can approach change through before I dig into the six key factors that prevent us from changing. We talk about self-acceptance and how we can relax our attachment to the current version of ourselves, before moving on to factors that affect motivation. We then discuss working with fears, becoming courageous, and leaning into a more authentic version of who we are.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction and disclaimer1:15 What is and is not in our capacity to change4:00 What works and doesn’t work in making personal change8:35 Distinguishing what is true, and creating spaciousness from your experience14:50 Holding onto an identity, recognizing your defenses, and trying new experiments29:20 Tips for finding motivation and releasing feelings of guilt36:10 Secondary Gains46:30 Courage, boredom, and fear of the unknown50:30 How our environment influences us56:00 Taking inventory of what is already working, and getting new input1:04:20 Authentically being you, surrendering to the best within you, and perseverance1:07:20 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Change Negative Thoughts: A Simple Framework | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-07-11 | In one of my favorite clips from a recent conversation, @RickHanson shares how to change the beliefs we have about ourselves. He uses changing beliefs related to low self-worth as an example.Let me know what you think about this highlight format.This clip is from episode 371, "The Psychology of Manifesting." youtube.com/watch?v=bDd3GLOBqTA Subscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Dealing with Depression, Building Stronger Relationships, and Working with Anxiety: July Mailbag Forrest Hanson 2024-07-08 | Dr. Rick and I open the mailbag and answer questions focused on strengthening our relationships. We explore how we can support friends and loved ones who are experiencing depression while also caring for ourselves, managing different levels of capacity within a relationship, maintaining self-worth and trust in the context of body image insecurities, and navigating the often tricky dynamics of a partner’s relationship with their ex. The episode closes with Rick and I sharing how we’ve handled repair in their parent/child relationship, and what we can do to manage anxieties about the future.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:30 Establishing boundaries with a loved one who is depressed16:30 Body image insecurity, and trusting that others love us31:45 How do I navigate my partner's relationship with their ex?41:15 I’m nervous that as my child ages they’ll blame me for my bad parenting. What can I do?1:01:25 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Become Disciplined: Motivation, Self-Concept, and Finding the Fun | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-07-01 | If we want to accomplish something in life it usually takes a combination of motivation and consistency - in other words, discipline. Discipline is both essential and shockingly hard to develop. In today’s episode, Dr. Rick and I explore how we can become more disciplined. We talk about whether discipline came naturally to Rick, and the lessons we can learn from his journey with discipline. Key topics include how to make even frustrating tasks rewarding, the relationship between discipline and self-concept, how to identify key wants, needs, and aspirations, and learning to feel good when we do good. Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:00 Rick’s history with cultivating discipline5:40 Finding the reward in necessary tasks18:00 Engaging in your life, and knowing what you really care about22:35 The power of self-concept31:05 Breaking things down into small parts36:20 Motivation, distress tolerance, and meta-motivation46:15 Getting out of a negative mindset, and finding what works for you54:00 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Psychological Defenses: WHY We Do WHAT We Do Forrest Hanson 2024-06-24 | Psychological defenses are subconscious strategies we use to protect ourselves from uncomfortable emotions, and they exert a hidden power over our behavior. From denial and repression to projection and rationalization, Dr. Rick and I explore how these defenses shape our actions, influence our relationships, and affect our overall well-being.We start with the function and structure of most defenses, before giving a few simple examples. Rick then dives into the role of defenses in psychoanalytic theory, their role in managing self-worth and shame, and what we can do to become less defensive over time. We close with practical strategies for working with our defenses, including a brief discussion of what we can do to help other people with their defenses.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:20 Psychological and historical factors influencing psychological defenses7:55 Some examples of unconscious anxiety bubbling up12:05 Repression, regression, projection, reaction formation, and sublimation17:20 An overview of Freud’s developmental model of the personality24:30 A few examples of how our defenses manifest34:15 Consciousness, competence, and joining the defense43:45 Navigating shame and guilt50:05 Distress tolerance57:15 Social connection, and finding healthy outlets1:00:30 When and how to approach others about their defensiveness1:10:55 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
The Fawn Response: People Pleasing, Self-Abandonment, and Standing Up for Yourself Forrest Hanson 2024-06-17 | Dr. Rick and I finish our series on the stress responses with the fawn response. The fawn response is an appeasement strategy, where we try to manage stressful situations by giving others what they want. Rick and I start by discussing common symptoms, including people pleasing, self-abandonment, difficulty saying no, weak boundaries, and chronic self-sacrifice. We talk about the roots of the fawn response and its connection to complex PTSD before exploring people pleasing in detail. In the second half of the episode we focus on practical tools for developing healthy boundaries, self-acceptance, and a stronger sense of self.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:10 What the fawn response looks like9:10 Power imbalance, shame, and contempt11:35 What predisposes someone to a habit of fawning20:25 Where to begin working on the tendency to fawn36:05 Shame, self-acceptance, and opening up to self-expression41:05 The fawn response in relationship46:20 Becoming your own source of safety52:05 Making equitable arrangements, and acknowledging your best efforts1:01:30 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Create a Secure Relationship with Elizabeth Ferreira | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-06-10 | Somatic trauma therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins me to explore how we can create more secure relationships. We talk about the lessons we've learned from our relationship, the impact of trauma and prior relationship wounds, and how very different people can make things work. Topics include complex PTSD, how to work through disagreements, changing our model of relationships, and learning how to actually support your partner.I loved this conversation, and hope you enjoy it!Key Topics: 0:00 Introduction1:00 The myth of relationships solving your problems, and self-awareness4:25 Me, you, and us14:00 Changing your partner by changing yourself16:55 Embracing the challenges of vulnerability23:40 Disagreeing well, making specific requests, and holding space33:50 Learning how to support your partner38:00 Five different styles of relationship41:00 Moving from trying to please your partner to showing compassion45:30 Love as a choice, and expressing wants and needs positively49:55 Simply liking your partnerSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Dealing With Negativity and Finding a Great Relationship: June Q&A | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-06-03 | Dr. Rick and I open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners. We explore how to deal with chronically negative people, managing avoidant tendencies that get in the way of us finding a great relationship, and separating normal desires for support from more problematic ones. We then talk about how we can build self-confidence and become more internally referenced, before closing the episode with a sticky situation involving supporting an aging parent. Key Topics:0:00 Introduction0:55 How can I remain positive when people around me are being negative?13:20 How can I move past a cycle of avoidance that’s inhibiting my ability to find a good relationship?25:35 How do I distinguish a healthy desire for help from enmeshment or codependent behavior?39:15 How do I stop seeking validation from others?45:10 How do I react to ongoing criticism from an aging parent?58:10 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
The Psychology of Manifesting: How to Create the Life You Want | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-05-27 | @RickHanson and I explore “manifesting:” the idea that our thoughts impact the world around us, and by changing those thoughts we can change our lives. Talking about manifesting is complicated, because on the one hand our thoughts really matter. On the other, manifesting is closely tied to a small mountain of problematic pseudoscience. We discuss and debate some of the issues with manifesting and the law of attraction before focusing on how to apply key psychological principles to create the life you want. Dr. Rick and I talk about creating clarity around our goals, setting intentions, improving self-worth and self-efficacy, and overcoming some of the negative unconscious beliefs that can get in our way, before exploring authenticity, consistent effort, and working with fear and inhibition. Then, in one of my favorite segments ever, Rick closes the episode by walking us through a practical example of how to change a belief.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction2:55 Defining manifestation, and psychological vs. supernatural mechanisms of action6:45 The mind-body connection, and the practical psychology of manifesting15:45 Charlatanism, uncertainty, and the problems with the law of attraction26:00 Changing behavior vs. changing thoughts, and the lure of the supernatural31:30 Context ends here32:35 Getting what we subconsciously believe we are worthy of, and “don’t know” mind38:00 Identifying wants, surrendering to the best within us, and using pain as a guide48:00 Embracing the reality of consistent effort54:20 How to change a belief1:07:55 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Calming the “Flight” Response: Anxiety, Avoidance, and Feeling Safe | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-05-20 | Dr. Rick and I discuss the “flight” response to stress, which includes feelings of anxiety and fear, avoidant behavior, and an underlying sense of insecurity. We explore the emotions and behaviors associated with the flight response, and how we can build up a stronger, more secure sense of who we are. Rick shares some practical tools that will help you change your self-concept, safely apply principles from graduated exposure, and feel safer from the inside-out.I’ve loved this series on the stress responses, and think you’ll get a lot out of this episode.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction0:50 The purpose of the flight response, and when it is and isn’t useful5:25 Social withdrawal, conflict avoidance, and preserving safety vs. comfort12:20 The trouble with low likelihood, high-cost risks16:40 Exploring our capacity for stress, and identifying the risks worth taking25:50 Feeling “sturdy,” and why we choose the flight response vs. other stress responses33:00 Graduated exposure 38:45 Learning to trust our new capabilities as we change44:40 Overdoing a change as a form of self-sabotage, and reserving the power to flee54:25 Responding to anxiety1:01:45 Being present with painful situations we can’t escape1:09:05 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Anger, Repression, and Self-Expression: Using Your Fight Response | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-05-13 | Dr. Rick and I continue our series on the stress responses with the “fight” response to stress. We explore anger, repression, and the balance of self-expression and self-regulation before talking about how we can claim the adaptive aspects of the fight response without falling prey to its more problematic aspects. A major focus of the episode is resentment and repression, alongside related topics like empowering yourself, managing expectations, and “experiencing out.”Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:10 The useful aspects of anger5:35 Specific behaviors associated with the fight response8:30 Giving yourself permission to express anger13:40 Navigating resentment21:30 Thwarted expectations as a source of unhealthy anger31:05 Claiming your anger, and being wary of the seductions of anger34:45 Developing an authentic sense of empowerment38:45 Going from complaint to request42:45 Antidotes to unhealthy anger52:15 Challenging authority without feeling intimidated or shamed53:50 Discerning healthy anger we feel with ourselves58:45 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
EVERYTHING You Need to Know About Therapy | Being Well Podcast Forrest Hanson 2024-05-06 | In this mega-episode, clinical psychologist Dr. Rick Hanson joins me to explore everything you need to know about therapy. We share how you can get more from therapy, how to find the approach that’s right for you, and why therapy is so expensive. We then run through the five major schools of Western psychotherapy before discussing a few alternative approahces. You’ll learn how long to stick with a therapist before looking for alternatives, questions to ask a prospective therapist, and how to maximize your results.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:40 The biggest factors that contribute to therapy going well7:25 Finding the therapeutic modality that works for you14:00 The cost of therapy, and the problem created by insurance companies20:35 Five major schools of western psychotherapy21:20 Psychodynamic therapy, and investigating the unconscious23:20 Behavioral therapy, and variable reinforcement25:55 Humanistic psychology, and seeing the good in yourself29:05 Cognitive therapy, why insurance companies like CBT, and exploring our beliefs36:15 Mindfulness-based or “third wave” therapies, reframing, and acceptance41:15 Family systems therapy, social justice, somatic therapy, and non-western thinking46:20 The difference (and similarity) between therapy and coaching51:40 How long therapy should take, and how to evaluate if it’s working1:01:15 The role of client motivation in getting results1:03:55 Questions to ask a prospective therapist1:09:15 The importance of the therapist’s engagement1:11:50 Common qualities Rick found challenging with past clients1:15:05 The importance of internalizing change, and recognizing what’s really shifting1:20:20 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a therapist, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
How to Recover from a Challenging Childhood | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-04-22 | Dr. Rick and I explore a huge topic: what can we do to recover from a difficult childhood as an adult? Rick introduces a three step process that can help us reclaim our past, identify the key needs we have these days, and internalize related positive experiences. We discuss related tools from psychology like releasing repressed emotions, claiming agency where we can, and changing what we emphasize in the story of our lives. If you had a hard time growing up, this one’s for you.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:35 Recovering from childhood wounds - Reclaim, Resupply, and Repair6:55 Clarifying your personal narrative, and the importance of agency12:15 How the unmet needs from your past impacts your present18:40 Changing what we emphasize in the story we tell ourselves29:15 Letting the fizz out of the bottle31:40 Identifying the right medicine for your unresolved wounds 37:35 How developing competency helps you break free from your past41:40 Self-soothing through envisioning positive experiences45:00 The process of letting go of the childhood you wish you had57:50 Naming what you want from life, and the universal ground of being1:02:00 Recap Subscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Dealing with Emotionally Immature People (and Parents) | Dr. Lindsay Gibson, Being Well Podcast Forrest Hanson 2024-04-15 | Dr. Lindsay Gibson joins the podcast to share her groundbreaking work on emotional maturity. Dr. Gibson and I explore how growing up with emotionally immature caregivers can affect our adult relationships, and what we can do to recover from these experiences, build healthier patterns, and disentangle from emotionally immature people. We start by discussing what emotional immaturity means, some of its key characteristics, and the consequences of growing up with emotionally immature parents. We then talk about how we can move away from “role-self” and develop a deeper connection with who we really are. You’ll learn practical tools for recognizing emotionally immature people, managing your relationships with them effectively, and establishing healthy boundaries.About our Guest: Dr. Lindsay Gibson is a clinical psychologist and the author of a number of books including Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents and Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People. Her most recent work is the Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents Guided Journal.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:10 What is emotional immaturity?7:30 Affective realism and involuntary coping mechanisms14:25 An example of a childhood with emotionally immature caregivers19:25 The “role-self,” and how children respond to a parent’s lack of empathy26:10 Receiving guidance and stability from the authentic self30:25 How the role-self affects relationships in adulthood41:50 Connecting with the authentic self, and having healthier relationships51:00 Letting go of healing fantasies in adult relationships57:05 Guilt, emotional coercion, fear of loneliness, and finding optimal distance1:04:05 How to identify with yourself as a secure base1:07:35 RecapSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Know THIS About Your 20s | Dr. Meg Jay, Being Well Podcast Forrest Hanson 2024-04-08 | Twentysomethings are bombarded with misinformation, hype, and contradictory messages that pull them in many different directions. Dr. Meg Jay, a specialist on what she calls the “defining decade,” joins me to explore how we can navigate this transformative and often anxiety-provoking time in our lives. We discuss the biggest misunderstandings about our 20s, balancing having fun with setting yourself up for the future, and common mental health issues. Topics include the pitfalls of self-diagnosis, creating a strong self-concept and building identity capital, dealing with burnout, strengthening our relationships, and more. About our Guest: Dr. Meg Jay is a developmental clinical psychologist who specializes in twentysomethings. She is on faculty at the University of Virginia, and is the author of a number of wonderful books, including The Defining Decade and her new book The Twentysomething Treatment: A Revolutionary Remedy for an Uncertain Age.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction1:10 The biggest misunderstanding about life in your 20s4:55 Uncertainty, and becoming confident in our abilities8:35 Nihilism about the current state of the world15:15 Self-diagnosis, social media, and over medication23:10 The “strength of weak ties”27:20 Self-concept and identity capital30:35 What helps people take action34:30 Navigating avoidance and anxiety42:35 Finding evidence that you’re capable of being loved47:30 What to do you when you feel stuck50:30 How to choose purpose1:00:35 Advice to people who feel like they messed up their 20s1:06:30 Recap Subscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
Managing the Freeze Response: Dissociation, Emotional Shutdown, and Creating Safety | Being Well Forrest Hanson 2024-04-01 | What do dissociation, avoidance, and shutdown all have in common? They’re connected to the “freeze” response to stress. In one of my favorite episodes to date, Dr. Rick joins me to explore the freeze response in detail. We talk about what stress responses are, how they impact our behavior, and why different people tend to default to different coping strategies. I explain what freezing looks like in practice, and why the freeze response can be particularly difficult to navigate. Rick then shares a number of helpful strategies for working with the freeze response, including strengthening self-confidence, and the feeling of ourselves as someone who can create safety. Towards the end of the episode we discuss managing these tendencies in a relationship.Key Topics:0:00 Introduction 0:55 Understanding stress responses9:05 Asking if your stress response serves your relationships15:35 Why it's hard to see that you're freezing19:20 Dissociation, and what freezing looks like in practice24:25 Steps of moving through dissociation29:45 Self-awareness, ‘global’ conditioning, and unconditional positive regard38:20 How Rick would work with someone who freezes: a case study53:55 Seeing yourself as a source of safety1:03:30 RecapOffer from Dr. Rick: If you'd like to improve your self-worth, check out Rick's new 4-hour, live online workshop. You'll learn methods and practices that can actually change your brain and your habits, so you start nurturing your sense of worth and belonging. Our listeners can get 20% off with coupon code BeingWell20. selfworthworkshop.comSubscribe to Being Well on: Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/being-well-with-dr-rick-hanson/id1120885936 Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/5d87ZU1XY0fpdYNSEwXLVQ Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth. I'm not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.You can follow me here: 🎤 apple.co/38ufGG0 🌍 forresthanson.com 📸 instagram.com/f.hanson
