From the album Little Criminals (1977)
Randy Newman
Randy Newman - Short People (Official Video)
From the album Little Criminals (1977)
From the album Little Criminals (1977)
updated 10 years ago
From the album Little Criminals (1977)
The eight-LP box set, released for Records Store Day's RSD Drop in July 2021, comprises his latest seven studio albums—'Born Again,' 'Trouble in Paradise,' 'Land of Dreams,' 'Faust,' 'Bad Love' (on vinyl for the first time), 'Harps and Angels,' and 'Dark Matter'—on 140-gram vinyl, featuring original album jackets, lyric/credit sheets, and 'Faust' demos.
#randynewman #vinyl
Stay Away
Venus in sweatpants
That's who you are
And when this mess is over
I'll buy you a car
We'll drive that car
So fast and so far
All your stupid friends
Will be left behind
Stay away from me
Baby, keep your distance, please
Stay away from me
Words of love in times like these
I'm gonna be with you 24 hours a day
A lot of people couldn't stand that
But you can
You'll be with me 24 hours a day
What a lucky man I am
Stay away from me
Wash your hands
Don't touch your face
How do you like that
Wash your hands
Don't touch your face
I saw you
Thirty years together
And we're still having fun
Once we were two,
Now we are one
Let's go out and get a burger
When you're done, you're done
Memories of the past
Be kind to one another
Tell her you love her every day
If you're angry about something, let it go
If the kids are frightened, tell them not to be afraid
But don't let them touch your face
Don't let them touch your face
#randynewman #darkmatter
#randynewman #darkmatter
#randynewman #darkmatter
#randynewman #darkmatter
#randynewman #darkmatter
#randynewman #darkmatter
#randynewman #darkmatter
Animation: John Erickson
Illustration: Roger Miller
#randynewman #darkmatter
Randy Newman's "Putin" won the Grammy Award for Best Arrangement, Instruments and Vocals. The song is on his 2017 album, Dark Matter: randynewman.lnk.to/DarkMatter
Putin
Putin puttin’ his pants on
One leg at a time
You mean he’s just like a regular fella, huh?
He ain’t nothing like a regular fella
Putin puttin’ his hat on
Hat size number nine
“You sayin’ Putin’s gettin’ big headed?”
Putin’s head’s just fine
He can drive his giant tractor
Across the Trans-Siberian plain
He can power a nuclear reactor
With the left side of his brain
And when he takes his shirt off
He drives the ladies crazy
When he takes his shirt off
Makes me wanna be a lady
It’s the Putin Girls!
(Putin Girls)
Putin if you put it when you
Put it where you put it
Putin if you put it
Will you put it next to me?
Putin if you put it when you
Put it where you put it
Putin if you put it
Will you put it next to me?
Now Putin hates the Putin girls
‘Cause he hates vulgarity
And he loves his mother country
And he loves his family
He and his ex-wife Lyudmila
Are riding along the shore
Of the beautiful new Russian Black Sea
Let’s listen in
A great man is speaking
We fought a war for this?
I’m almost ashamed
The Mediterranean
Now there’s a resort worth fighting for
If only the Greeks or the Turks
Would start to sniff around
I’d bring the hammer down
So quick their woolly heads would spin
Woolly head, woolly head, woolly head
Or, wait a minute
Even better
What if the Kurds got in the way?
Hey! Kurds and way, curds and whey!
Sometimes a people is greater than their leader
Germany, Kentucky, France
Sometimes a leader towers over his country
One shot at glory, they don’t get a second chance
I dragged these peasants kicking and screaming
Into the 21st century
I thought they’d make it
I must have been dreaming
These chicken farmers and file clerks gonna be the death of me
I can’t do it
PG – Sure, you can
I can’t do it
PG- Yeah, you can
What makes you say that girls?
PG – Tell you why. ‘Cause you’re the Putin man
Who whipped Napoleon?
PG- We did!
Who won World War II?
PG- The Americans!
That’s a good one ladies
It’s our turn to sit in the comfy chair
PG – And you’re the man gonna get us there!
I don’t know, Lenin couldn’t do it
I don’t know, Stalin couldn’t do it
They couldn’t do it
Why you think I can?
PG – You’re gonna lead our people
To the Promised Land
You’re right, ‘cause, Goddamn,
I’m the Putin Man
#randynewman #darkmatter
Get the album on iTunes: http://smarturl.it/HarpsAndAngels.iT
Get the album on iTunes: http://smarturl.it/HarpsAndAngels.iT
Buy the album on iTunes: http://smarturl.it/HarpsAndAngels.iT
Get the album on iTunes: http://smarturl.it/HarpsAndAngels.iT
Get the album on iTunes: http://smarturl.it/HarpsAndAngels.iT
Buy the album on iTunes: http://smarturl.it/HarpsAndAngels.iT
Buy the album on iTunes: http://smarturl.it/HarpsAndAngels.iT
Get the album on iTunes: http://smarturl.it/HarpsAndAngels.iT
From the album Land of Dreams (1988)
When the song was first released as a single in 2007, its lyrics published as an op-ed in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times called it a “three-decades-on bookend to Political Science ... so funny it hurt," and Rolling Stone named it #2 on its list of the year's best singles.
A Few Words in Defense of Our Country
I’d like to say a few words
In defense of our country
Whose people aren’t bad nor are they mean
Now the leaders we have
While they’re the worst that we’ve had
Are hardly the worst this poor world has seen
Let’s turn history’s pages, shall we?
Take the Caesars for example
Why within the first few of them
They were sleeping with their sister
Stashing little boys in swimming pools
And burning down the City
And one of ‘em, one of ‘em
Appointed his own horse Consul of the Empire
That’s like vice president or something
That’s not a very good example, is it?
But wait, here’s one, the Spanish Inquisition
They put people in a terrible position
I don’t even like to think about it
Well, sometimes I like to think about it
Just a few words in defense of our country
Whose time at the top
Could be coming to an end
Now we don’t want their love
And respect at this point is pretty much out of the question
But in times like these
We sure could use a friend
Hitler. Stalin.
Men who need no introduction
King Leopold of Belgium. That’s right.
Everyone thinks he’s so great
Well he owned The Congo
He tore it up too
He took the diamonds, he took the gold
He took the silver
Know what he left them with?
Malaria
A President once said,
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself”
Now it seems like we’re supposed to be afraid
It’s patriotic in fact and color coded
And what are we supposed to be afraid of?
Why, of being afraid
That’s what terror means, doesn’t it?
That’s what it used to mean
[To the first eight bars of “Columbia The Gem Of The Ocean”]
You know it pisses me off a little
That this Supreme Court is gonna outlive me
A couple of young Italian fellas and a brother on the Court now too
But I defy you, anywhere in the world
To find me two Italians as tightass as the two Italians we got
And as for the brother
Well, Pluto’s not a planet anymore either
The end of an empire is messy at best
And this empire is ending
Like all the rest
Like the Spanish Armada adrift on the sea
We’re adrift in the land of the brave
And the home of the free
Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.
From the album Live in London (2011)
Available at http://www.nonesuch.com/albums/live-in-london
A BBC / Nonesuch Records co-production
Recorded live at LSO St. Luke's, London, June 22, 2008
with BBC Concert Orchestra; Robert Ziegler, conductor
Directed by Nick Wickham
Produced by Serena Cross
From the album Land of Dreams (1988)
I'M DREAMING
George Washington was a white man
Adams and Jefferson too
Abe Lincoln was a white man, probably
And William McKinley the whitest of them all
Was shot down by an immigrant in Buffalo
And a star fell out of heaven
I'm dreaming of a white President
Just like the ones we've always had
A real live white man
Who knows the score
How to handle money or start a war
Wouldn't even have to tell me what we were fighting for
He'd be the right man
If he were a
I'm dreaming of a white President
Someone whom we can understand
Someone who knows where we're coming from
And that the law of the jungle is not the law of this land
In deepest darkest Africa nineteen three
A little boy says, "Daddy, I just discovered relativity.
A big eclipse is coming
And I'll prove it. Wait and see!"
"You better eclipse yourself outta here, son
And find yourself a tree
There's a lion in the front yard
And he knows he won't catch me."
How many little Albert Einsteins
Cut down in their prime?
How many little Ronald Reagans
Gobbled up before their time?
I don't believe in evolution
But it does occur to me,
What if little William Howard Taft had to face a lion
Or God forbid, climb a tree?
Where would this country be?
I'm dreaming of a white President
Buh buh buh buh
'Cause things have never been this bad
So he won't run the hundred in ten seconds flat
So he won't have a pretty jump shot
Or be an Olympic acrobat
So he won't know much about global warming
Is that really where you're at?
He won't be the brightest, perhaps
But he'll be the whitest
And I'll vote for that
Whiter than this?
Yes
Whiter than this?
Yes
Whiter than this?
Yes
Whiter than this?
Oh yeah
http://www.nonesuch.com/albums/randy-newman-songbook
http://www.nonesuch.com/albums/songbook-vol-3
From the album Live in London (2011)
Available at http://www.nonesuch.com/albums/live-in-london
A BBC / Nonesuch Records co-production
Recorded live at LSO St. Luke's, London, June 22, 2008
with BBC Concert Orchestra; Robert Ziegler, conductor
Directed by Nick Wickham
Produced by Serena Cross
From the album Trouble in Paradise (1983)


