Why Do I Find Apple’s Ads Unsettling? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2026-09-17 | Why Do I Find Apple’s Ads Unsettling?
Its The Thought That Counts | Coming To Our Senses (Vol 9) Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-09-29 | Coming To Our Senses is a community zine, delivered through The-Haven.co It provides us with a space to explore the intersection of high sensitivity, creativity, and the world around us.This issue started about six weeks ago with a community conversation exploring the phrase, "it's the thought that counts". This is the result.Curated and composed by Andy Mort.Featuring work from Barbra, Christine, Rose, Tuula, and Zoie.Fancy joining us to explore our full zine archive and bring your creative spirit to future issues? You're very welcome!Coming To Our Senses Homepage: the-haven.co/zineInstrumental Version (Soundcloud): soundcloud.com/andymort/its-the-thought-that-countsTimestamps00:00 Welcome02:00 Zine Intro02:34 My Letter to James09:20 Presence or Presents? (Christine)16:38 Crippled by Certainty (Zoie)20:36 Reflections on Loneliness (Collected by Barbra)30:22 I am The Sky32:42 Closing Reflections35:23 Outro
Sustaining Your Creative Practice (with Steve Lawson) Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-09-26 | Should the audience, as Rick Rubin suggests, "come last"? Or is there a more nuanced and sustaining question to explore instead?Steve Lawson's approach to making music and sustaining the development of his creative practice has always resonated with me. Over the past twenty-five years, he has carved out a living as a solo improvisational bass player, developing a thoughtful and sustainable model for art that resists the common assumptions that drive an obsession with numbers and scale. I spoke to Steve about the topic of his recently completed PhD, A Study Towards a New Model for Subscriber Audience Involvement in Improvised Music. His thesis turns that lived experience into a lens for questioning many of the assumptions baked into how we think about creativity today.Full notes (and audio version): the-haven.co/audience-comes-withSteve's Music: stevelawson.bandcamp.comTimestamps00:00 Introduction07:50 How The Audience Became Part of Steve’s Creative Ecosystem17:00 Scenius, Reception Theory, and The Space of The Talkaboutable22:00 The Audience Shouldn’t Come Last (It’s Not a Competition)30:20 What is a Community of Practice?35:29 The Boring Drive To Constantly Wow (and Deceive) People41:00 Transformative vs Incremental Change 46:26 How Can I Keep Doing This in a Way Works For Me?48:00 Selling Integrity To Algorithms and Trends1:00:00 The Only Decent Music Happened Forty Years Ago1:01:58 Championing and Supporting Music in a Meaningful Way1:07:55 The Impact of Unintegrated Nostalgia on Music Makers1:14:45 Picking Up The Bass and Playing Through Dark Times 1:17:15 The Extraordinary Response of a Subscriber-Based Audience in a Culture of Enoughness
Hypervigilance and High Sensitivity Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-09-20 | In this week's episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, we explore why hypervigilance is a common experience for HSPs, how it shows up in everyday life, and ways we might support our nervous systems in returning to a sense of safety and connection. I examine hypervigilance within a social and cultural context for HSPs, rather than from a clinical or individual psychological perspective.Download the HSP Owner's Guide: the-haven.co/hsp-owners-guideFull notes for this episode: the-haven.co/hypervigilance-and-high-sensitivitySubscribe to The Gentle Rebel Podcast: the-haven.co/gentle-rebel-podcast
The Birth of Positive Thinking: James Allens Legacy Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-09-06 | Who was James Allen? Perhaps one of the most influential self-help gurus I had never heard of. I kept seeing references to "As a Man Thinketh" as one of the foundational texts that led to the law of attraction and manifestation movement. Related to New Thought, it felt like an appropriate text to explore alongside our Haven theme this month, "it's the thought that counts". After all, Allen himself declared: "A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts." Would you agree?Full Post: the-haven.co/as-a-man-thinketh-a-history-of-self-helpTimestamps:00:00 Introduction03:22 Who Was James Allen?11:28 Thought and Character25:07 The Effect of Thought on Circumstances35:30 The Effect of Thought on Health and Body38:33 Thought and Purpose42:52 The Thought-Factor in Achievement49:53 Visions and Ideals57:23 Serenity (and Conclusion)
In Defence of Wasting Time Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-24 | Are you worn out by the pressure to be useful, always working to prove your worth through productivity?We often feel guilty about “wasting time.” But what if those supposedly inefficient, unproductive moments are actually where creativity and meaning live? In this Notes From a Slow Coach video, I reflect on a social media post about keeping our “coffer of ideas” full, and connect it with Byung-Chul Han’s The Burnout Society (yes, again!). Is our fear of slowing down, pausing, and wasting time actually fueling burnout? And what might change if we reclaimed time for play, ritual, and even pointless excess instead?Subscribe to receive Notes From a Slow Coach in your inbox: the-haven.co/notes-from-a-slow-coach
Overstimulation and High Sensitivity Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-22 | In this week's episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, we look at the relationship between sensory processing sensitivity and overstimulation. Susceptibility to overstimulation is one of the core elements associated with being a highly sensitive person. But what does that mean?What does it look like in practice? And is there anything we can do about it other than avoiding stimulating environments and situations? At the get-go, I want to answer that question with a resounding yes...In this video, I explore:The difference between stress and overstimulationCommon signs (physical, emotional, cognitive, and behavioural)What happens in the body when overstimulation occursPractical strategies for prevention, relief, and recoveryWhy sensitivity isn’t a flaw, but a natural variation in human temperamentIf you’ve ever felt suddenly drained, foggy, irritable, or like you need to escape, this might give you language and tools to understand what’s happening beneath the surface.Download the HSP Owner's Guide: the-haven.co/hsp-owners-guideFull Post: the-haven.co/overstimulation-and-high-sensitivityDifferential Susceptibility: the-haven.co/differential-susceptibility-and-high-sensitivityTimestamps00:00 Introduction 01:52 Highly Sensitive Isn't Who You Are03:10 The Microphone Metaphor06:15 High Sensitivity and Stimulation12:05 What Do We Mean by Overstimulation?16:47 What Overstimulation Might Look and Feel Like25:02 Self-Regulating When Overstimulation Hits33:56 The Social Side of Overstimulation38:21 Conclusion (The Challenge of No Margin)
Do you notice connections between unlikely things? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-17 | Maybe a better question than “how can I do this faster?" is “what could be made possible if I gave it more time?” And "what will I lose if I do this quickly?"Get my Notes From a Slow Coach in your inbox: the-haven.co/notes-from-a-slow-coach
New Project Exploring the History of Self-Help Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-15 | Inspired by recent events and long-held questions, I’m starting to dig into the history of self-help. I’ll be reading books, exploring ideas, and examining the cultural forces that shaped this mammoth industry. In this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, I share why I’m drawn to the topic, what I plan to explore, and how you can join me along the way.Read more: the-haven.co/history-of-self-help-introduction
A “real” man, you say? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-10 | I’ve been accidentally collecting clips of AI adverts for Military Workouts. It's the shirtless men on fake podcasts and the guy with the leaky chin that got me...In this video, I share what I’ve found, why I can’t stop watching them, and what they reveal about trust, identity hooks, and the dandelion-style flood of AI content we’re now living in. Also, can we slow down and take a more whale-like approach to creativity, action, and the choices we make instead?Have you seen anything like this? Share in the comments.LinksThe Ecology Of Artificial Intelligence (Jonathan Cook): jonathanccook.medium.com/the-ecology-of-artificial-intelligence-bb8169e839c8Notes From a Slow Coach: the-haven.co/ai-adverts]Timestamps00:00 Introduction (Examples)02:33 Why I Think This Matters04:38 What Are These Adverts Doing?06:55 Familiarity and Trust09:22 The Unshakeable Confidence of AI Influencers10:26 Disclaimers11:18 Can You Spot an AI Ad?12:50 Repetition is a Red Flag13:30 Identity, Self-Worth, and Social Manipulation15:30 The Ecology of Artificial Intelligence (Dandelions and Whales)17:07 Digital Pollution and Our Response to It18:08 AI Influencers as Disembodied Broadcast Dieties20:50 Conclusion
We are like microphones Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-06 | There’s a cultural myth that strength lies in being unfazed by noise and chaos; able to perform under pressure, stay cool under scrutiny, and thrive in overstimulation.But optimal performance isn’t the same for everyone.
They arrived but never left Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-04 | The footsteps only go in one direction. And they seem to stop here. Whoever they belong to arrived but never left.Is that comforting or unsettling?
A permanent state of temporary discomfort Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-02 | In this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, we explore the insidious pressure of toxic positivity through our modern obsession with mindset. Is CANI (constantly and never-ending improvement) a source of burnout, emotional suppression, and shame? Are we taught to solve problems with more of what causes them in the first place?We look at James Allen (As a Man Thinketh), Viktor Frankl (Man's Search For Meaning), Byung-Chul Han’ (The Burnout Society and Psychopolitics), and Black Mirror - Nosedive.Full notes: the-haven.co/toxic-positivityTimestamps:00:00 Introduction - do our thoughts really create our reality?00:55 Memefied positivity03:09 Positive thinking is a tricky terrain04:32 As a Man Thinketh (James Allen)06:30 The Burnout Society (Byung-Chul Han)07:59 CANI (constant and never-ending improvement)09:14 Man's Search for Meaning (Viktor Frankl)10:44 Attitude in Allen vs Frankl20:05 Black Mirror Nosedive (finding freedom in the jail cell)23:15 Another view on burnout25:20 Conclusion
Where does the time go? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-08-02 | I stand at the kettle again. It's like no time has passed since I was here yesterday morning. It slips through my hands. A worrying reminder of the fleeting nature of life. Something I can't control. I can't slow it down. But can these anchor points provide a bench in time?
Can we rise above childish division? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-07-30 | It appears we can’t be left alone to celebrate and enjoy nice things - we have to turn them into pointlessly competitive battlegrounds, making false comparisons and debating which eclipses the other. In this video, I consider why the media loves stoking childish outrage and division amongst us…and how we might gently rebel against the predictable games we're being baited into playing.Timestamps00:00 What Does It Mean to Be Eclipsed?00:56 England's Euro 2025 Victory and Reasons I Love Sport02:40 BBC Radio 4 Broadcasting House03:20 Media Hype or Deliberate Provocation?03:54 Is this helping "foster nuanced and intricate conversations in today's polarized society"05:05 Media Responsibility and Online Abuse of Players06:37 Social Triggers and Our Irrational Tribal Preferences (Radiohead and Comedies)07:27 Forging Identity By Avoiding Nuance09:12 Who Profits From My Rage? (and how can we subvert our predictable reactions?)
We leave imprints Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-07-25 | We don't choose to leave our imprint on the world around us. Whether we want it to or not, our presence is worn into the environment through our physical being, the words we speak, and the choices we make. We leave a mark.
How is Mel Robbins Silencing Her Critics? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-07-24 | I wasn’t planning to make another video about the Let Them Theory controversy, but a recent Guardian feature on Mel Robbins made it hard to stay quiet.The article gives Robbins space to respond to concerns about the origins of her "Let Them" story and the accusations of plagiarism, but it includes no detail on what those concerns actually are. The writer even says, “I agree it’s fairly weak criticism,” which makes sense when they only include Robbins’ spin on it.There’s a double standard here, especially against the backdrop of last week’s Guardian editorial: “The Guardian view on The Salt Path scandal: memoirists have a duty to tell the truth.” Does this responsibility only apply to one genre? In this video, I explore what it means to “silence critics” when you have a global platform, deep pockets, and the media on your side.Links: ‘Women have more power than they think’: self-help superstar Mel Robbins on success, survival and silencing her critics by Emine Saner (The Guardian) - theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2025/jul/19/mel-robbins-self-help-superstar-success-survival-silencing-criticsPart One | Mel Robbins conceals the truth of her let them “discovery” - youtube.com/watch?v=qQ_xip3l1ioPart Two | Mel Robbins responds to "Let Them" allegations - youtube.com/watch?v=ryQBcUuN8pkPart Three | Why the Mel Robbins "Let Them" situation concerns everyone (with Sage Justice) - youtube.com/watch?v=aCTjxY0MSrY Context:Mel Robbins and Plagiarism - sagejustice.substack.com/p/mel-robbins-and-plagiarismCan Mel Robbins Trademark Your Words? - sagejustice.substack.com/p/can-mel-robbins-trademark-your-wordsIncluded:Uncovering the higher truth of Jay Shetty theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/ng-interactive/2024/feb/29/jay-shetty-self-help-empire?CMP=share_btn_urlChris Evans and Mel Robbins: The Let Them Theory | "The More Control You Give Up, The More You Gain" - youtube.com/watch?v=x5v_JRdHaxMTimestamps: 00:00 Introduction01:09 Timeline Recap08:20 Silencing Criticism09:50 Double Standards at The Guardian?10:51 DARVO Tactics13:00 Marketing Genius15:00 No Attention To Detail17:25 The Salt Path18:53 The Truth Hurts20:29 Weaponising The Let Them Theory21:24 Conclusion - Truth Doesn't Disappear (even when it's hidden)* Robbins' words at the end are from the Guardian article
Mel Robbins is silencing critics of the #letthemtheory Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-07-24 | Longer video: How is Mel Robbins Silencing Her Critics?youtu.be/7Bffkhj_hRk
Coming To Our Senses (Issue 8, End Music) Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-07-21 | Coming To Our Senses is a community zine, published through The Haven. It infuses the Haven’s spirit, giving us a platform to explore the intersection of high sensitivity, creativity, and the world around us. It builds on themes and topics we’ve been exploring since 2014.
The footsteps only go in one direction Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-07-17 | Join us in The Haven on Sunday for the launch of this month's zine. It is inspired by our conversation last month reflecting on the prompt, "the footsteps only go in one direction". We meet on Zoom to watch/listen and then there's a bit of time afterwards for questions and reflections.
Do people say you care too much? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-07-11 | Have you ever felt like you’re carrying the weight of the world’s wrongs inside your body? Do people tell you to stop worrying, let it go or pull yourself together when you can't stop thinking about acts of injustice and unfairness?Join me for this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast to explore the concept of "moral sensitivity". Let me know if anything speaks to you.Download the HSP Owner's Guide: the-haven.co/hsp-owners-guideTimestamps00:00 Introduction00:47 The HSP Owner's Guide07:25 What Might Moral Sensitivity Look Like in a Highly Sensitive Person?07:42 Ethical Awareness09:43 Connection With Meaning14:40 Responsibility and Diligence17:46 Sensitivity to Moral Nuance19:55 Personal Relationships21:54 Work and Social Settings24:02 Self-Expectations24:49 Balancing Idealism with Realism25:53 Managing Emotional Responses to Injustice28:20 Over-Responsibility For The Wellbeing of Others30:00 Finding Like-Spirited Communities31:29 Sensitivity is a Natural and Neutral Trait34:39 Finishing Question
Sometimes Things Get Wonky (Sound Anchor) Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-07-03 | This sound anchor came from a discussion about developing and losing daily rhythms, the pressure we put on ourselves to use time perfectly, and how we can embrace a seasonal approach to returning to what matters, without forcing it. Learn more about coaching spirals: the-haven.co/fireside-spirals
Everything wants us hooked Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-06-27 | In Hooked: How to Build Habit-Forming Products, Nir Eyal sets out the four step Hook Model, which countless apps, brands, and companies have used to attract and retain customers over the past decade.But what sort of habits do these products and services help us form? And will they let us leave when the time is right?Timestamps00:00 Introduction00:29 Tonight's the night to cut the streak01:11 Solid rocket booster metaphor02:54 Keep the customer hooked04:55 My seventy-six-day Duolingo streak06:22 Duolingo is an AI-first company08:09 Getting hooked (Nir Eyal)08:55 The Hook Model Step 1 - Trigger10:31 The Hook Model Step 2 - Action12:09 The Hook Model Step 3 - Variable Rewards14:54 The Hook Model Step 4 - Investment15:50 Who benefits when we get hooked?19:01 Punished by Rewards (Alfie Kohn)21:17 The Burnout Society (Byung-Chul Han)23:20 What next?25:37 Getting unhooked (ending the streak)Books MentionedHooked: How to Build Habit-Forming Products by Nir Eyal Punished by Rewards by Alfie KohnThe Burnout Society by Byung-Chul Han
Why do we hate icebreakers so much? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-06-15 | “Let’s go around the room and introduce ourselves with your name and something interesting about you”. Does that fill you with excitement? If not, you’re not alone. But is it simply a matter of preferences, or are there deeper processes at play when it comes to disliking icebreaker activities? That's what we explore in this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast.This is a follow-up to the episode Social Sensitivity and The Highly Sensitive Person - youtube.com/watch?v=DFiJHxI9QkoDid anything I talked about stand out to you? I'd love to hear from you. Drop a comment below or get in touch through The Haven: the-haven.coWatch/Listen/Read the Latest Coming To Our Senses Zine: the-haven.co/library/coming-to-our-senses
Social Sensitivity and The Highly Sensitive Person Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-05-23 | Have you ever been in a room and sensed social dynamics beneath the surface before a word was spoken? Perhaps you've noticed (consciously or unconsciously) a subtle glance, a shift in posture, or a hint of tension between the lines. If so, you’re not alone. This kind of social sensitivity is part of being a highly sensitive person (HSP).This episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast is the first in a series that will explore the social dimensions of sensory processing sensitivity.I’d love to hear what this episode brings up for you. Are any of the elements I discuss familiar to you?Full Notes: the-haven.co/social-sensitivity"The HSP Owner's Guide": the-haven.co/hsp-owners-guide
Is Creativity The Art of Concealing Your Sources? Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-05-09 | It has been said that “Creativity is the art of concealing your sources.” But what does that mean? Is it about passing off other people’s work as your own? Or is it less about copying influences and more about concealing them like seeds in the soil?My randomiser prompt wheel selected this phrase for me on Tuesday ahead of our Serenity Island Picnic. I'll be honest, when I first saw "Creativity is the art of concealing your sources," I was tempted to spin again. However, I decided to give it a go and found a few interesting threads to pull at.Links:Full Notes and Audio Podcast: the-haven.co/concealing-our-sourcesThe Return To Serenity Island: serenityisland.meThe Haven Community: the-haven.co
A Still Life Comes in Many Flavours Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-05-02 | What do you think of when you hear the words A Still Life?We read Josie George’s memoir, A Still Life, in The Haven book club last month. After our group discussion with Josie, I’ve been reflecting on the meaning of stillness and its many forms and flavours.In this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, we explore the layers of stillness present in the book, from the stifling slowness imposed by illness or circumstance, to the deep, peaceful resilience that absorbs life’s ripples without breaking. Stillness can be a captured moment in art, a book, or a song. It's a framed snapshot in time.LinksFull Post: the-haven.co/a-still-lifeFollow Josie Down The Rabbit Hole: https://linktr.ee/wonderlandletters
How Environments Shape and Impact HSPs Differently Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-04-18 | Differential susceptibility is a key concept in high-sensitivity research. In simple terms: The more sensitive you are, the more your environment impacts you (for better or worse). Environmental sensitivity isn't just about the physical space, it’s about how your nervous system responds to the full context including people, pressures, and the capacity to engage with your creative depths.In this episode, we explore:• Why HSPs experience environments more intensely• The stories the nervous system tells and why building calm is about more than mindset• Ways to design spaces that work with sensitivity (and why this is in ALL of our interests)🔗 Full Post: the-haven.co/differential-susceptibility-and-high-sensitivity🔗 Download the HSP Owner’s Guide (free):the-haven.co/hsp-owners-guide
Where we wanted to be Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-04-13 | My note from a slow coach this week involves Baltic endorphins, some internal torment thanks to a decision my past self made, which my present self didn't appreciate, and a poem pondering whether adventure is truly just around the corner. It's an excerpt from a journal entry a couple of weeks ago when I was in Finland.🔗 the-haven.co/may-the-flow-rise-to-meet-you
Why the Mel Robbins Let Them situation concerns everyone (with Sage Justice) Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-04-10 | "Be responsible for telling people the truth, not managing peoples' reactions to it." - Mel RobbinsIn this video, I chat with Sage Justice who has played an instrumental role in documenting the story about the questions surrounding Mel Robbins' claims about how she "discovered" The Let Them Theory.We talk about how and why we had our attention unexpectedly caught by this situation. We also look at some of the common themes in the pushback we have seen in comments from those defending Mel, and hopefully answer them in a satisfactory way.*32:43 The phrase ‘firm back with a soft front’ (our community definition of gentleness) is rooted in Buddhist idea "strong back, soft front" (also in Brene Brown's work). Thanks to those of you who have pointed to these origins.Timestamps00:00 Introduction02:36 How and why did Sage start writing about this Let Them situation?07:55 How did I become aware of this situation?19:03 Mel's response to the scrutiny25:45 Responding to push back from commenters30:28 "This Idea Isn’t New, Cassie doesn't have a right to claim she came up with it"34:54 "Who cares? Mel Helps People! Who are YOU helping? Stop trying to tear others down"39:50 "Mel Changed it, evolving it with research"43:45 "Mel has spent 10 years shining a light on other people’s work, so the allegation that she would steal someone else’s work is ridiculous. She acknowledges people (check out her bibliography which includes over 50 experts), how dare you say she doesn't."50:47 "Why Target Mel? Others do things like this, too!"1:02:49 "I've never heard of Cassie Phillips or a Let Them movement"1:04:50 "Isn't Mel innocent until proven guilty? We should take her at her word1:13:02 "Simultaneous Invention - two people can have the same idea at the same time"1:17:24 "You’re just a hater. You're jealous. You're working for Cassie Phillips."Linksthe-haven.co/let-them-theoryPart 1 | Mel Robbins conceals the truth of her let them "discovery" - youtube.com/watch?v=qQ_xip3l1io Part 2 | Mel Robbins responds to "Let Them" allegations - youtube.com/watch?v=ryQBcUuN8pkSage's Articles and BookSage Words Freedom Book One: Create a life you don’t need a vacation from - amazon.com/Sage-Words-Freedom-Book-One/dp/B09V121NV6/ref=sr_1_1?crid=Q5Z80EQQZ4E6&keywords=sage%20words%20freedom&qid=1648364481&sprefix=sage%20words%2Caps%2C138&sr=8-1Mel Robbins and Plagiarism - sagejustice.substack.com/p/mel-robbins-and-plagiarismCan Mel Robbins Trademark Your Words? - sagejustice.substack.com/p/can-mel-robbins-trademark-your-wordsMel Robbins, Cassie Phillips & The Courage to do the Right Thing - sagejustice.substack.com/p/mel-robbins-cassie-phillips-and-theBeware - sagejustice.substack.com/p/bewarePublic Pressure & Mel Robbins sagejustice.substack.com/p/public-pressure-and-mel-robbinsUsurped, Poem - sagejustice.substack.com/p/usurped-poemOther LinksCassie Phillips - cassie-phillips.comUncovering The Higher Truth of Jay Shetty (John McDermott) - theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/ng-interactive/2024/feb/29/jay-shetty-self-help-empire
It’s the sound of ICE! Whoa! 🤯 Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-04-09 | The sound of ice is incredible!I was drinking my morning coffee. There were noises coming from outside. I guessed it was someone messing with a drum machine so I went out to find them and jam along. They were nowhere to be seen.Not on the other side of the lake either. Turned out to be the sound of the lake itself. Of the ice expanding.It's the most eerily beautiful thing. It blows my mind. I feel very lucky to have been there to witness it.
Wearing other peoples clothes Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-04-06 | Do you ever feel like you're wearing someone else's clothes in life? Like you’re trying to change yourself to fit a mould that wasn’t made with you in mind?All of my life I have been wearing them,the hand-me-downs, the pants too long,arms of sweaters stretched longer than mine,sleeves of shirts I rolled up like newspapers,those shoulders that would never stay in place,always remembering: we are here to fit in.And the very shoes that narrowed on my feet,I gave away or traded up for other people’s soles.I have thought somewhere there must be menwhose socks don’t shrink, whose buttons stay put,whose shirts never wear out at the elbows.I paid for what other people gave away.All of my life I wanted to stand tall,but as I grew up my clothes kept wearing out, whenin my child’s heart, I only wanted the comfort of corduroy,a face that didn’t need ironing, a crease that would stay put—these labels I hoped wouldn’t rub off.—Michael Magee (Other People's Clothes)Does this feel familiar? Links:Other People's Clothes (Michael Magee) - realchangenews.org/news/2007/04/11/poem-other-people-s-clothesThe Well Worn Kota - the-haven.co/well-wornCheck out my threads! The local library where you can borrow a new outfit - https://www.positive.news/society/the-local-shropshire-library-where-you-can-borrow-secondhand-fashion/
Songs from the sauna cabin Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-04-05 | I’ll do a livestream (songs and chat) tomorrow Sunday 6th April (6pm UK time). Over on my music channel (youtube.com/live/k-sMdQXwSkw)I've spent the past month in Finland finding fun spots to play and record songs from my back catalogue. It's been great reimagining them for the guitar (oh, the joy of restrictions and limitations!).As my trip comes to an end, I will do a live stream from a lakeside sauna cabin in the forest. I would love for you to join me if you can make it - I'll play (and chat) for about an hour. Drop in for as long as you like. At times like this (I seem to be saying that a lot these days), it's always nice to hang out and share music alongside good-spirited humans.Fancy joining me?
An Antidote to The Hurry and Hustle Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-04-05 | In this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, we explore The Forest of Wool and Steel by Natsu Miyashita - a novel that subtly subverts our pervasive obsession with productivity, the "hero's journey", and the narrow metrics by which we define success. This book serves as a refuge for anyone who has ever felt out of step with hustle culture or questioned why integrity and depth seem so radical. Listen and Full Notes: the-haven.co/forest-of-wool-and-steelTimestamps:00:27 Introduction02:52 Purpose and Chance encounters08:32 Transcending the hero's journey15:42 High sensitivity is ordinary22:10 Mono No Aware23:36 A non-linear view of mastery27:49 Releasing hustle culture and the judgement of usefulness and waste31:27 Programmed to resist slowness and find safety in the hurry35:06 ConclusionHave you read The Forest of Wool and Steel? Share your thoughts about it (or my response to it) in the comments.
Mel Robbins responds to Let Them allegations Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-03-29 | Mel Robbins has issued her first response to questions about discrepancies in her "Let Them Theory" origin story. In a statement to The New York Post, she said:“People can obsess over any detail, but the facts are simple: I have not seen her poem, I have not read her poem, and it was not and will never be the source of inspiration for my book. This is nonsense. I have spent 10 years shining a light on other people’s work, so the allegation that I would steal someone else’s work is ridiculous. As I write in ‘The Let Them Theory,’ you cannot control what people say, do, feel, or choose to make up about you. People can say anything about you – at school, at work, on the internet – and you can’t control it. Let Them.”This video examines:- Recent developments in this story- The continued confusion about the timeline discrepancies- The dubious tactics employed in the responseTimestamps00:00 Introduction01:48 A Co-Author Credit For Sawyer (Development One)04:24 Successful Application to Extend Trademark Appeal (Development Two)05:51 Mel Responds To The New York Post (Development Three)09:42 How To Respond To Valid Scrutiny of People We Admire12:06 Obsessing Over the Details14:30 "This concept has been around forever"16:39 But Cassie Admitted Being Inspired By Tyler Perry18:07 Side By Side Comparison (The Poem and The Reel)19:49 Art and Self-Help Occupy Different Spaces20:35 Isn't This Just Simultaneous Invention?21:23 How Mel COULD Have Responded23:36 How Mel ACTUALLY Responded24:13 Moral Ledger Keeping Tactic25:11 Weaponising "Let Them" As a Tool For Control27:38 It's Not Too Late For a Positive Pivot29:10 ConclusionLinks:Part One | Mel Robbins conceals the truth of her let them “discovery” - youtu.be/qQ_xip3l1ioPart Three | Why the Mel Robbins "Let Them" situation concerns everyone (with Sage Justice) - youtu.be/aCTjxY0MSrYLet her? Army wife claims Mel Robbins stole her idea for blockbuster self-help book (By Michael Kaplan , New York Post - nypost.com/2025/03/12/lifestyle/army-wife-claims-mel-robbins-stole-her-idea-let-them-book)Public Pressure & Mel Robbins (Sage Justice) - sagejustice.substack.com/p/public-pressure-and-mel-robbinsBirthday gift to Sawyer - instagram.com/p/DG4NKvIPm-m/?igsh=MW1idWEzZHQzeXEzMQ==LET THEM - JUST LET THEM (Looking at Life with Dee) - youtube.com/watch?v=8w_w1PhvXOE"I've just heard about this thing called the Let Them Theory" (Mel Robbins, May 13th 2023) - instagram.com/melrobbins/reel/CsLvs-voVTO/?hl=enSledgehammer (Peter Gabriel) -youtube.com/watch?v=OJWJE0x7T4QInterview Clips:Lewis Howes - youtube.com/watch?v=9OsNWnZJXrsJay Shetty - youtube.com/watch?v=P91b4civBxAKatie Couric - youtube.com/watch?v=kFvT-zQ_lug
The gift of low expectations Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-03-16 | When you receive help, do you perceive it as a transactional burden or gift?How do you support the people, ideas, and art you admire? Do you feel disappointed when they go against your views, or do you willingly allow them the freedom to grow and evolve into whatever they might become, despite potential disagreements?In this Notes From a Slow Coach, we explore the dynamics of conditional versus unconditional support - how it shapes creativity, relationships, and our manner of engagement. From the pressure of transactional expectations to the freedom of genuine encouragement, we will reflect on what giving and receiving support without strings attached means.Get Notes From a Slow Coach delivered to your inbox: the-haven.co/notes-from-a-slow-coach
The Impact of Status Insecurity Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-03-14 | In this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, we explore the "vicious cycle of status insecurity". Why do some people fear giving credit? How does this impact us? And how might we can loosen its grip if it's something we experience?We’ll also consider the story of self-help author Mel Robbins refusing to acknowledge poet Cassie Phillips or the pre-existing "Let Them" movement in her recent book. Does this move reflect elements of status insecurity?- What is status insecurity, and how does it trap us in a cycle of stress and self-sabotage?- Why sharing credit actually boosts respect and trust (and why we’re afraid to do it).- How the self-help industry’s emphasis on individualism fuels status insecurity.- Practical ways to gently rebel against status insecurity and redefine success on your own terms.Join the Conversation:Have you ever felt the pressure to prove your worth or status (or been around someone who was caught in this way of thinking)? How did it affect you? I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. Drop a comment or send a message.Links: Full episode notes: the-haven.co/vicious-cycle-of-status-insecurityThe vicious cycle of status insecurity (Hoff, Rucker, Galinsky) pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/39621388
A response to bullying Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-03-02 | I know I’m not the only one disturbed by the scenes of Donald Trump and J.D. Vance publicly dressing down Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky in the White House.I was saddened by the bullying behaviour of those entrusted to know and be a whole lot better than that. The lack of empathy, the attempts to humiliate and intimidate, and the smirking childish arrogance was embarrassing to see from people in the highest positions of political leadership.It presents us with a question. Does this reflect the world we want to live in?00:00 Introduction07:05 Poem - Maturity (Sage Justice)🔗 Full Notes From a Slow Coach: the-haven.co/bullying🔗 Sage Justice - Maturity: sagejustice.substack.com/p/maturity
Wintering is the rebellion we need Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-02-26 | Katherine May describes Wintering as “a season in the cold. It is a fallow period in life when you’re cut off from the world, feeling rejected, sidelined, blocked from progress, or cast into the role of an outsider.”We’ve all experienced these times in life, but wintering is a quiet act of defiance in a world that never stops.It is an example of gentle rebellion in the face of the perpetual demand to be productive and useful. It’s choosing rest over empty hustle, care over competition, and creativity over endless productivity.May suggests that we often treat these winters as something to hide or ignore. However, embracing them is “a radical act—choosing to slow down, letting spare time expand, and getting enough rest. If you shed this skin, you’ll expose all those painful nerve endings and feel raw. But if you don’t, the old skin will harden around you.”This resonates deeply with what we do in The Return to Serenity Island.🏝️ Join me this year to rest, explore, and play: serenityisland.me🔗 Full Notes: the-haven.co/embracing-wintering-on-serenity-island
Why You Dont Need To Come Out of Your Shell Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-02-21 | Have you ever been told to come out of your shell? It’s a phrase many of us have heard, especially if we’re introverted, sensitive, or reflective by nature. But what if this idea misunderstands the role of a shell? What if, instead of seeing it as a limitation, we saw it as a space of protection, growth, and even creativity?In this video, we explore the idea of shells—not as barriers to break free from, but as integral parts of who we are. Whether you’re an introvert, a highly sensitive person, or someone who values quiet reflection, your shell might just be one of your greatest strengths.Pick The LockIf this feels alive for you and you’d like a sounding board to bounce ideas off, I’d love to invite you to book a Pick The Lock call - the-haven.co/pick-the-lock
What does your shell make possible? #Introvert #stayinyourshell #hsp #quietlycreative Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-02-21 | ...
The Means Justify The End Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-02-14 | We’ve all heard the phrase, “the end justifies the means.” In this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, I turn it inside out and explore it from another angle. What if, for some people, focusing solely on the outcome as the ultimate goal can lead to a dissatisfying and alienating approach to life?With the conceptual approach, the end justifies the means. With an experimental approach, the means justify the end. It’s more about the journey than the destination. The process itself brings the “end” into focus, even if it doesn’t feel complete. It’s a waypoint on a road to nowhere, anywhere, and everywhere.LinksFull notes: the-haven.co/the-means-justify-the-endThe Return To Serenity Island - serenityisland.meDo You Feel Like a Late Bloomer? This May Explain Why - kendrapatterson.com/blog/2020/11/12/do-you-feel-like-a-late-bloomer-this-might-explain-whyExperimental Writers vs. Conceptual Writers - williamlanday.com/2010/08/30/experimental-writers-vs-conceptual-writersThe Let Them Theory - the-haven.co/let-them-theory
Why Mel Robbins failed to include Cassie Phillips and the #letthem poem in her book #selfhelpbooks Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-02-12 | ...
Mel Robbins conceals the truth of her let them “discovery” Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-02-10 | Short version - youtube.com/shorts/ni8aOTZWNNM?si=0e2oNTAh8yB09_z_ Part 2 | Mel Robbins responds to "Let Them" allegations - youtube.com/watch?v=ryQBcUuN8pkPart 3 | Why the Mel Robbins "Let Them" situation concerns everyone (with Sage Justice) - youtu.be/aCTjxY0MSrYMel Robbins' book has sparked controversy.In May 2023, her video about discovering the Let Them Theory went viral. However, from the start, she failed to credit where or from whom she heard the concept. While Let Them isn’t new, Mel ignores that this particular Let Them moment had already gone viral, inspired by a poem by Cassie Phillips in late 2022. Where HAD she "just heard about this thing called the Let Them Theory"?Despite claiming extensive research, Mel omits this context in her book and publicity. She also portrays herself as the catalyst for people getting Let Them tattoos, yet this trend began in 2022, long before her involvement.Mel claims her discovery happened at a high school prom, but the timeline doesn't match. Her original video was posted the day before her son's prom. In a podcast on May 29th, 2023, she says she’d been practising the theory for some time, implying she knew about it before she "just heard about it," as described in a viral May 13th video.She has shared this story with prominent figures like Oprah, Simon Sinek, Mayim Bialik, Kelly Clarkson, and Lewis Howes and mainstream platforms like The Today Show. Millions trust these voices, yet key details have been overlooked, shaping a misleading and exclusionary narrative.So why has Mel altered the timeline? And why does her version erase the fertile ground that led to the movement from which she is profiting? Timestamps00:00 Intro02:00 Cassie Phillips & The Missing Context06:19 What IS The Let Them Theory?09:51 Not a New Idea10:26 Tattoos, Discovery Video, and Podcast16:20 Mel's Prom Story19:21 After The Prom20:16 The Word "Discovery"24:33 Facebook Post26:50 Controlling and Trademarking30:46 Conclusion32:59 Awkward GoodbyesSourcesMel Robbins and Plagiarism - sagejustice.substack.com/p/mel-robbins-and-plagiarismCan Mel Robbins Trademark Your Words? - sagejustice.substack.com/p/can-mel-robbins-trademark-your-wordsPostsThreads (@soheefit) - threads.net/@soheefit/post/DFgWvKSzwmT?hl=enTrademark - tsdr.uspto.gov/documentviewer?caseId=sn98643523&docId=PNR20241122120502&linkId=1#docIndex=7&page=1Cassie Phillips FB Post - facebook.com/cassie.sturgill/posts/pfbid0R2A3jEJr9d9uuNxH6JxiZ33tsjS3XdFY9KNAM12y8XvWVxRUuiqV6Vx69EAS2NELlInterviewsThe Pivot Pod - youtube.com/watch?v=iHUV4E2DGDI&t=2596sThe Prof G Pod - youtube.com/watch?v=RnqWhWZsvxsMatthew Hussey - youtube.com/watch?v=VGUgfK1gfCsLewis Howes - youtube.com/watch?v=9OsNWnZJXrs&t=329sJay Shetty - youtube.com/watch?v=P91b4civBxA&t=135sKatie Couric - youtube.com/watch?v=kFvT-zQ_lugMayim Bialik - youtube.com/watch?v=EoIwvvFhm00&t=4146sSimon Sinek - youtube.com/watch?v=JP5USHGSF8oThe Squeeze - youtube.com/watch?v=ce1ACxrI6scOprah - youtube.com/watch?v=8_JGarGAPg4&t=2175sKelly Clarkson - youtube.com/watch?v=D5J_ULDK9n8&t=4sTODAY - youtube.com/watch?v=x8wgk9hBrQUMel RobbinsDiscovery video (19th May 2023) - youtube.com/shorts/sEDZwG6bFssIG (13th May) - instagram.com/melrobbins/reel/CsLvs-voVTO/?hl=enPodcast (29th May 2023) - youtu.be/d4z5C8G32AY?si=AyPIgvdokDUiyPfZThe Let Them Story (Cassie Phillips)Part 1 - tiktok.com/@cassiebrookephillips/video/7459969167219805483Part 2 - tiktok.com/@cassiebrookephillips/video/7459985172851903790Part 3 - tiktok.com/@cassiebrookephillips/video/7460004932830235946Let Them PoemLooking at life with Dee - youtube.com/watch?v=8w_w1PhvXOE&Andy Mai - youtube.com/watch?v=M5A8_9mvRmANobel Cats - youtube.com/watch?v=a2fqok9t1oI&Angel - youtube.com/watch?v=XVGke8ascXQMidnight Road - youtube.com/watch?v=DCZ8W3BQcrYBigSizeFam - youtube.com/watch?v=O8tsOtw0NJYLaugh Lines & Life Lessons - youtube.com/watch?v=0Tr2PvuKISITattoosinstagram.com/p/Cr9FRaIRm-2instagram.com/p/CmwgdcYueYWinstagram.com/p/CljtYerpcsuinstagram.com/p/CmXlhlNtCFYinstagram.com/p/Co6bAILvG6oinstagram.com/p/CrOpsiXJw-Uinstagram.com/p/CsM_Bs0M5gotiktok.com/@tayjaj/video/7207099531689905454tiktok.com/@natalyiawilson/video/7163070524443266350tiktok.com/@yayathedondiva/video/7221635851728588078tiktok.com/@_ronist_/video/7302501622045773086tiktok.com/@nikkichastain31/video/7232147703134686506tiktok.com/@sshiells.s/video/7186708725762166021
Power in persistence Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-01-19 | The randomiser wheel picked "Power in persistence". I'm currently using a tool to select phrases for my daily journal practice. They are all associated with the theme of Strength: the-haven.co/strength
Active Hope When The World Is Falling Apart (with Cindy Gale) Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-01-17 | Many people feel overwhelmed, uncertain, or powerless in a world grappling with climate crises, political instability, and societal upheaval. But what if there was a way to process these emotions and transform them into meaningful action? This is the premise of "The Work That Reconnects" and Active Hope: How to Face the Mess We’re in with Unexpected Resilience and Creative Power, developed by Joanna Macy and Chris Johnson. These tools invite us to explore our emotional responses to the world, shift our perspectives, and find meaningful ways forward.In this episode of The Gentle Rebel Podcast, I chat with Cindy Gale, a psychotherapist, transactional analyst, and facilitator of The Work That Reconnects. In our conversation, she shared several practices for staying anchored as we navigate the pressing complexity of our times.Full Description: the-haven.co/active-hope-with-cindy-galeBuy The Book: amzn.to/40aZOC5Cindy's website: cindygalehsp.comThe Work That Reconnects: workthatreconnects.org
Strength in numbers Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-01-16 | The randomiser wheel picked "Strength in numbers". I'm currently using a tool to select phrases for my daily journal practice. They are all associated with the theme of Strength: the-haven.co/strength
No pain, no gain Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-01-14 | The randomiser wheel picked “No Pain, No Gain”. I’m currently using a tool to select phrases for my daily journal practice. They are all associated with the theme of Strength. Learn more: the-haven.co/strength
It was uncomfortable... Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-01-12 | The randomiser wheel picked "It Was Uncomfortable". I'm currently using a tool to select phrases for my daily journal practice. They are all associated with the theme of Strength: the-haven.co/strength
Power through Andy Mort | The Gentle Rebel 2025-01-09 | The randomiser wheel picked "Power Through". I'm currently using a tool to select phrases for my daily journal practice. They are all associated with the theme of Strength: the-haven.co/strength
